ONE SHOT. TEMPORARY SOLITUDE.
TITLE : TEMPORARY SOLITUDE
DESCRIPTION : one shot. angst somewhat.
AUTHOR : 003lastwords
PAIRING : vam <3
POV : first.
DISCLAIMER : i don't own anyone, obviously.
that's illegal.
sue me if you want, i don't have any money.
I reside in the house of a boy whom I do not love. He guides his bedroom door shut, the two of us enclosed within the room. The sound the doorknob produces seems to resound and echo through the house. Eyes of guilt rest upon me. Restless I find myself, my skin becoming lightly salted from my sweat. Ice crystallizes on the glossy window panes of the room and I focus on the frosty patterns woven into large elaborate designs. I am not nervous, I know what is to follow. I am not nervous, guilty perhaps? I avoid eye contact. I do not want him to notice the distant, removed look radiating from my eyes. Maybe he prefers to focus only on the slight glint of lust which becomes unbridled occasionally during my stay. A shallow sigh escapes my lungs as he pushes me onto his bed, tears at my shirt and crawls onto my lap in an effortless chain of routine motions. This boy whom I do not love is now pressing his lips to my neck. I suddenly notice Trouble, his kitten, delicately pawing at the bottom of the bedroom door. I sympathetically watch the poor creature try to escape the room. I allow a fake moan to escape my lips. My mind is elsewhere, thinking of my wife and child at home. My eyes trace the curves and contours of the sinewy body of a boy whom I do not love. When did I begin to value these late night meetings more than anything else? Why? The more questions that float around in my mind, the less clothes I find myself wearing. The boy whom I do not love and I proceed to finish what we started. Slumber then finds its way into the bed we share. I bury my face into his pillow and he clings to me, arms wrapped around my almost anorexic frame. It’s the same plot without variation, every movement expected, predicted, habitual. I wish to suffocate in these pure white pillows. I wait until he is asleep so I can make my routine escape from his clutches. His door seemingly takes hours to open and I cautiously slip out of his house, wordless. Snow dances from the sparkling dark of dawn. My trembling hand produces a flame from a chrome lighter and I stand outside and shiver in the cold. In that moment, I realize I have no where to go. In that moment, I realize home and a woman whom I love lay across the ocean. I extinguish my cigarette and slip back into the house of a boy whom I do not love. The heat radiating from the house is a stunning contrast with the frigid winter air and my cheeks flush a shade of rose. I crawl back into the bed of a boy whom I do not love. I solely seek his warmth, not his love. Slumber finds its way into the bed we share and closes my tired eyes, carrying me to dream of the comfort of home.
---
comments make my life better.
<3!
DESCRIPTION : one shot. angst somewhat.
AUTHOR : 003lastwords
PAIRING : vam <3
POV : first.
DISCLAIMER : i don't own anyone, obviously.
that's illegal.
sue me if you want, i don't have any money.
I reside in the house of a boy whom I do not love. He guides his bedroom door shut, the two of us enclosed within the room. The sound the doorknob produces seems to resound and echo through the house. Eyes of guilt rest upon me. Restless I find myself, my skin becoming lightly salted from my sweat. Ice crystallizes on the glossy window panes of the room and I focus on the frosty patterns woven into large elaborate designs. I am not nervous, I know what is to follow. I am not nervous, guilty perhaps? I avoid eye contact. I do not want him to notice the distant, removed look radiating from my eyes. Maybe he prefers to focus only on the slight glint of lust which becomes unbridled occasionally during my stay. A shallow sigh escapes my lungs as he pushes me onto his bed, tears at my shirt and crawls onto my lap in an effortless chain of routine motions. This boy whom I do not love is now pressing his lips to my neck. I suddenly notice Trouble, his kitten, delicately pawing at the bottom of the bedroom door. I sympathetically watch the poor creature try to escape the room. I allow a fake moan to escape my lips. My mind is elsewhere, thinking of my wife and child at home. My eyes trace the curves and contours of the sinewy body of a boy whom I do not love. When did I begin to value these late night meetings more than anything else? Why? The more questions that float around in my mind, the less clothes I find myself wearing. The boy whom I do not love and I proceed to finish what we started. Slumber then finds its way into the bed we share. I bury my face into his pillow and he clings to me, arms wrapped around my almost anorexic frame. It’s the same plot without variation, every movement expected, predicted, habitual. I wish to suffocate in these pure white pillows. I wait until he is asleep so I can make my routine escape from his clutches. His door seemingly takes hours to open and I cautiously slip out of his house, wordless. Snow dances from the sparkling dark of dawn. My trembling hand produces a flame from a chrome lighter and I stand outside and shiver in the cold. In that moment, I realize I have no where to go. In that moment, I realize home and a woman whom I love lay across the ocean. I extinguish my cigarette and slip back into the house of a boy whom I do not love. The heat radiating from the house is a stunning contrast with the frigid winter air and my cheeks flush a shade of rose. I crawl back into the bed of a boy whom I do not love. I solely seek his warmth, not his love. Slumber finds its way into the bed we share and closes my tired eyes, carrying me to dream of the comfort of home.
---
comments make my life better.
<3!