Prologue to my new story
Title: We All Fall Down...We Just Never Know When To Pick Ourselves Back Up
Author: Moi,
Rating: I'd say a hard PG-13
Pairing: A wee bit of Ryan Ross(P!ATD)/Bammie but it'll be vam...eventually
Summary: Set in the 1820s or so. Bam's gay, the rest of his family finds out so he's forced to do the maid's work, and looked down upon. Finally, insanity kicks in, and he kills them all one night, and his fate lies in the form of an insane asylum, where he meets Ville.
Disclaimer: Don't own, don't sue. Really, how can this be true?
Warnings: Lots of angst and flashbacks. Don't say you weren't warned.
Notes: All flashbacks are in italics.
Prologue
The creak of the wooden floors under my bare feet should’ve awoken me from my walking slumber, where I would’ve stopped, and turned, and went straight back to the cozy warmth of my four poster bed, awaiting the dreaded morning where Jess would push me out of bed just like every morning at 6:30 to clean his already tidy room. The wooden floors cannot do all though, and even though the creaks reached my ears and penetrated my skull, I still did not turn around and go back to room, and perhaps now that I am looking back upon the incident I was not actually asleep, just terrorized, traumatized, wanting it to all be over. Little did I know, it all would be over, just because of a fatal mistake that I chose to make, the one that would change my life and put me in the most agonizing hell possible. To think one is insane is one thing; to torture them in hopes of accomplishing the goal of helping them is a total other. Such pain as my family put me through was nothing in comparison to what I was about to endure.
My stomach throbbed, threatening to empty its contents as I slowly walked down to the door. I believe my self-conscious knew exactly what I planned to do, but I, for one, did not know a thing until I actually did it. In fact, it happened so quick I had to go back and look at the blood on my hands that I was washing off and stare and stare at those corpses to actually understand the meaning of it all. The blood on my hands...it couldn’t possibly have been related to me, could it have been?
And one look at those mutilated bodies told all. And to think, it all started with a kiss...a kiss that changed my life.
"You’re cute."
"Are not. You’re cute."
"Are not! You’re way cuter than me!"
I found myself laughing along with Ryan Ross, my best friend and crush. He was the maid’s son, and although it was a sin to think of another man in such a way, I found my wet dreams often containing the likes of him. I didn’t hear the door open as I leaned over and kissed Ryan, my lust grabbing a hold of me and steering me in the direction to infinite hell.
"Oh my lord!" screeched Mother, unused to such behavior. Like I had said before, such acts on another male by a male were prohibited, only to be punished in the cruelest of ways. The sound of glass breaking told me that Mother was bringing lemonade to us; I didn’t dare look up at her in fear of the rage that became of her.
Eyes wide, I sat in the middle of my bed, legs pulled up to my chest. Somehow I felt nearly no remorse, just fear, fear for what might become of me, fear of what could happen once people found out. How long could I live a lie, until the townspeople noticed something wrong? My heart pounded like a jackrabbit in my ribs, and I was so very sure that it would jump out and I would die right there on the spot, and at the time I was so afraid of death that I had both of my hands over my heart, in an attempt that, if such might happen, I could save myself.
What I didn’t know was that death would be far better than what lay ahead of me. I was opening up a farther, unexplored path of deep hatred and doom, but at the time I did not feel it coming at me, in a wave of darkness that would soon engulf me, and live in me, turning me to the deepest and cruelest of thoughts.
Author: Moi,
Rating: I'd say a hard PG-13
Pairing: A wee bit of Ryan Ross(P!ATD)/Bammie but it'll be vam...eventually
Summary: Set in the 1820s or so. Bam's gay, the rest of his family finds out so he's forced to do the maid's work, and looked down upon. Finally, insanity kicks in, and he kills them all one night, and his fate lies in the form of an insane asylum, where he meets Ville.
Disclaimer: Don't own, don't sue. Really, how can this be true?
Warnings: Lots of angst and flashbacks. Don't say you weren't warned.
Notes: All flashbacks are in italics.
Prologue
The creak of the wooden floors under my bare feet should’ve awoken me from my walking slumber, where I would’ve stopped, and turned, and went straight back to the cozy warmth of my four poster bed, awaiting the dreaded morning where Jess would push me out of bed just like every morning at 6:30 to clean his already tidy room. The wooden floors cannot do all though, and even though the creaks reached my ears and penetrated my skull, I still did not turn around and go back to room, and perhaps now that I am looking back upon the incident I was not actually asleep, just terrorized, traumatized, wanting it to all be over. Little did I know, it all would be over, just because of a fatal mistake that I chose to make, the one that would change my life and put me in the most agonizing hell possible. To think one is insane is one thing; to torture them in hopes of accomplishing the goal of helping them is a total other. Such pain as my family put me through was nothing in comparison to what I was about to endure.
My stomach throbbed, threatening to empty its contents as I slowly walked down to the door. I believe my self-conscious knew exactly what I planned to do, but I, for one, did not know a thing until I actually did it. In fact, it happened so quick I had to go back and look at the blood on my hands that I was washing off and stare and stare at those corpses to actually understand the meaning of it all. The blood on my hands...it couldn’t possibly have been related to me, could it have been?
And one look at those mutilated bodies told all. And to think, it all started with a kiss...a kiss that changed my life.
"You’re cute."
"Are not. You’re cute."
"Are not! You’re way cuter than me!"
I found myself laughing along with Ryan Ross, my best friend and crush. He was the maid’s son, and although it was a sin to think of another man in such a way, I found my wet dreams often containing the likes of him. I didn’t hear the door open as I leaned over and kissed Ryan, my lust grabbing a hold of me and steering me in the direction to infinite hell.
"Oh my lord!" screeched Mother, unused to such behavior. Like I had said before, such acts on another male by a male were prohibited, only to be punished in the cruelest of ways. The sound of glass breaking told me that Mother was bringing lemonade to us; I didn’t dare look up at her in fear of the rage that became of her.
Eyes wide, I sat in the middle of my bed, legs pulled up to my chest. Somehow I felt nearly no remorse, just fear, fear for what might become of me, fear of what could happen once people found out. How long could I live a lie, until the townspeople noticed something wrong? My heart pounded like a jackrabbit in my ribs, and I was so very sure that it would jump out and I would die right there on the spot, and at the time I was so afraid of death that I had both of my hands over my heart, in an attempt that, if such might happen, I could save myself.
What I didn’t know was that death would be far better than what lay ahead of me. I was opening up a farther, unexplored path of deep hatred and doom, but at the time I did not feel it coming at me, in a wave of darkness that would soon engulf me, and live in me, turning me to the deepest and cruelest of thoughts.