The Hunger Ch. Two

[ask_the_angels6]

Pairing: Vamish
Summary:
Ville has been a widower for two years because his wife Claire was killed by this guy Mark Christian, a local maniac who has preyed upon the Valo family since their only child , Jastine was born some 14 years ago. Slowly Ville seems to be spiraling into a deep depresion, Jastine is the only thing keeping him from ending his

Comments

[bloodhill]

Oh that cant not like Bammie. But I like this, it makes me laugh. :)

[bloodhill]

I ment they not that. Oh and FC!!!

[ask_the_angels6]

you're good at FCs you now that. and thanks i appreciate the love and support.

[bloodhill]

oh I'm good at FC's cause I have no life at the moment. :)

[ask_the_angels6]

yeah that always sucks

[dyingforyourluv]

Hmmm....I like the premise to this story. A lot. However, the layout confuses me a bit. Maybe you should try your hand at simple html sometime, it could really pollish up the way your story is presented. If you want some pointers, I'll gladly give them to you.

Other than that, I wish the chapters were longer. And a beta-reader might be a good thing to grab, just to clean up the few grammatical and spelling errors here and there. Just a suggestion.

But in all I like it, and I hope to read more soon!

[ask_the_angels6]

ill be sure to look in to that , thnx

[him_fan812]

Not to sound like a bitch but why is there a theme song in the middle of the story of every chapter?

[ask_the_angels6]

i don't know, i felt like putting in a theme song. purely out of bordome

[him_fan812]

Oh ok but it's still a good story cant wait for more.

[jalluvsrmz]

Yay! Bam's here, now! Can't wait for more!