she takes off her dress now
if you want to know the truth
i'm not coming back i'm not coming back i'm not coming back to you
i'm going back to the same place that started this whole mess & none of you are going to be there with me.
i am going back to the exact same place that started this entire mess & not a single one of you are going to be with me this time around.
i am going right back to the place that started this whole chain of (chaotic) events, & for the first time in my whole entire twenty years of living, not a single one of the (former & current) pieces of my life & heart are going to be right my side telling me that they are equally as scared as i am, & i don't know if i hate myself or them more because someone, somewhere, was abandoned, & i can't help thinking that it was me, because goddamnit, all of you seem to be doing just fine & dandy with someone by your side, & why the fuck didn't either of them call me back tonight when just hours earlier, i felt oh so honored to have not one but two boys who cared enough about me to say 'i'll call your parents house even if it'll wake them up', even though they were in two entirely different contexts, i still felt lucky enough to have a great boy by my side who likes me & another who is a best friend, but neither called & danny is out with his brother & i can't just help feeling that i have done not one thing, but everything terribly wrong in the last twenty years & seven months & thirteen days & some hours.
i'm not coming back i'm not coming back i'm not coming back to you
i'm going back to the same place that started this whole mess & none of you are going to be there with me.
i am going back to the exact same place that started this entire mess & not a single one of you are going to be with me this time around.
i am going right back to the place that started this whole chain of (chaotic) events, & for the first time in my whole entire twenty years of living, not a single one of the (former & current) pieces of my life & heart are going to be right my side telling me that they are equally as scared as i am, & i don't know if i hate myself or them more because someone, somewhere, was abandoned, & i can't help thinking that it was me, because goddamnit, all of you seem to be doing just fine & dandy with someone by your side, & why the fuck didn't either of them call me back tonight when just hours earlier, i felt oh so honored to have not one but two boys who cared enough about me to say 'i'll call your parents house even if it'll wake them up', even though they were in two entirely different contexts, i still felt lucky enough to have a great boy by my side who likes me & another who is a best friend, but neither called & danny is out with his brother & i can't just help feeling that i have done not one thing, but everything terribly wrong in the last twenty years & seven months & thirteen days & some hours.