update <3

[__takemeaway__]

Well I haven't really been updating because most of you, (not all) don't mean anything to me, so I didn't think you sould have the privledge of hearing about whats going on in my life, but I'm bored so here it goes

Comments

[gunshotsymphony]

So I read your post. (and no it wasnt so i could cause "drama" its because i care)

"Just about everyone else in the past I've been friends with has done something super shitty to me. Or I look at them now and I am disgusted."

So what exactly is it that I have done to you, thats so shitty? I know we've been having our arguements latley, but Im still not really sure what EXACTLY it was? Or if thats not it then what part of me discusts you? I would really like to know seeing as not to long ago we both agreed that we are the only ones that HAVENT done anything shitty to eachother. Im not trying to cause an arguement. I just think its shitty we've been friends since 4th grade, and just becuase you dont like the people i associate with, you are going to hate me for it. If this is going to cause a fight between me and you again then dont even reply. But Personally I would like to work it out between us. you ARE my best friend. I dont think that the people i hang out with or the people you do should come between somthing that i thought was so strong.

here goes nothing.

[__takemeaway__]

Ok, I'm letting you know this isn't easy, and it took me about an hour and a half to decide if I am going to reply to you or not.

I'm not sure excatly how to word this so I'm just going to go step by step...

So what exactly is it that I have done to you, thats so shitty?

The fact that you assumed the shit that was going on with your journal was me. I'm not going to lie, I did know who and it's not just one certain person, but this doesn't matter now because it's over with. In one entry you went on and on about how I dwell on other peoples lives, how I have "issues". Cassie, if you are saying I'm your best friend, then you would know me just a little bit better than that.
You said how I changed, yes I have changed. But I have changed for the better. I can't really say you have done me wrong, but what you have done in these past months has disgusted me. Cassie since we have been old enough to know the difference from right and wrong, I have always known you to stick up for yourself, and stand up for what you believe in.
The Cassie now, isn't that same person. The Cassie now is someone who lets useless fucks talk shit about you, say all these horrible things about you and then lie to your face about it, and you let it slide. That isn't cool. What also isn't cool is the fact how these mere wastes of oxygen do all these things to you and you call them your best friend. How many times have I heard you say "Oh I went out with Kelly and Taryn last night and I payed for everything"...or...."I went out with them last night and since I payed for everything last night you'd think they would buy me a drink or something". C'mon now, I have a good memory, and you said this the night after I met Mike. Which was about 5 months ago. Then in the past I hear about how pissed off you were because you were so into Sean and what did your best friend do? She fucked him while you were in the next room. What did she do while she was living here, she talked shit about you and how you slept with allllll these people and how you got herpes from Dan. I just don't understand how it is these people treat you and then its all ok and you are best friends with them.
You asked what disgusts me, thats my answer. Your beliefs have changed, and it is sad, because you let these pieces of shit walk all over you. And the only reason why I got so angry, is because I care about you and hate to see these idiots do this to you.

The people I hang out consists of Mike. He doesn't stop me from doing anything. In fact he has encouraged me that I should go hang out with my friends on quite a few occasions. The problem is, I don't have any. And it's not because of them not wanting to be my friend, its me not wanting to be theirs.

Re: here goes nothing.

[gunshotsymphony]

I never said it was you. but i figured you knew who it was. thats why i asked you. and that post about dwelling on peoples lives wasnt to you. yea i did say you were starting drama, but thats when you IMed me after i changed my screen name and you still found it. I didnt want anyone to know it. only about 3 people did at the time. but now we are getting off the subject.

I understand the whole Taryn and Kelly thing. and i havent hung out with them in at least a month besides when they are at a show im at or whatever. the only person i hang out with now is my boyfriend and Krista. becuase of exactly what you have just said. I dont let taryn and kelly walk all over me anymore. thats why we havent been getting along that well lately. when they do somthing shitty, i say somthing.

I COMPLETELY understand about the "friends" situation.

I know you just wanted the best for me, but i just wish you could understand that the best for you isnt always whats best for me. im not talking about taryn and kelly anymore. I know you look at where im at in life right now and think Im being an idiot with staying at the job im at and not going to school. but its where i am, and i like it here for now. I do plan on making a future for myself. Ive already told you what i want to do and as soon as im capable of doing it, i will.

I know we probably will never be like we were...but I dont want us to dislike eachother.

Re: here goes nothing.

[__takemeaway__]

okay, sorry it took so long to get back to you, but I have been busy.

as for the post about me dwelling on other peoples lives, yes it was to me, because right after I im'd you you posted that, lol But anyway.

Glad to know you aren't letting people take you for granted, you don't need it.

And yes, I do want the best for you. And I do know whats best for me isn't for you. It's something that I have forgot about a long time ago. You are having fun right now, living your life. I had my fun, partying, hanging out with my friends all the time, which is not bad in the least bit. But I am just growing up, it takes some people more time than others to realize what is important in life. It took me a while, and i realized, if I want to go somewhere in life, and make money, I'm going to have to apply myself.. And thats all I'm doing.

I don't hate you Cassie, i dont dislike you, but the things you said about me, were hurtful.

Re: here goes nothing.

[gunshotsymphony]

the post wasnt directly towards you. yes, it did apply to the situation, but it wasnt only for you. remeber, im cassie...drama is always surrounding me.

as for the things i said about you...I dont remeber saying things about you besides that you all were creating drama. but if i did say anything else im sorry for it. The things you said to me were quite hurtful too. and i didnt have just you saying things...I had all 3 of you.

anyways sorry for it all.

Re: here goes nothing.

[gunshotsymphony]

holy typos.