Aug 29, 2004 23:25
Yeah.. So I know it's been a while sence I have updated. I've been busy I guess. Since then, uhh..... a lot happened. School started last Monday. I guess that is ok so far. I don't have any classes with Drew, nor do I see her through out the whole day. ..and she's so busy with Homework/ Cross Country/ Band that she has no time for me. I left her a note on her windshield after work the other day while she was at practice, I thought it would be...uhh......'sweet' of me. So I did. It read: "Hey Beautiful, Hope your first few days have been great. Too bad we don't have more classes together. Love, ..oh you know. P.S. Don't be afraid to call me.." She called me the next day. Nothing was really said.. Same ole same ole.. Well, I see her at the game on Friday - she said she would call me Saturday night to do something..................Saturday comes......................No call. I waited all night in my room. Even when it got to be 11 o'clock, I was still waiting for maybe even an appology. But once it hit 12, I was pretty upset. I wasn't going to take it easy if she did call, so I'm glad she didn't. I decided to take a drive.. I got out twards the movie theatre and I got a call..it was Adam, we talked a while and he calmed me down a bit. I was still pretty upset though. The next day (today) came........But still no call. I ended up going to a movie with Aaron and his new woman. She is a beautiful girl, I think he deserves her but he needs to think about stuff before he does it. I gave him some advice, and it was to take your time, and not rush into anything..he agreed, but I don't think it will help. Anyways, she brought a freind.. I really did not like her. She would not stop swearing and talking about parties and what not. I didn't like it. It made me realize how much I missed Drew, and loved certian things/ qualities that she had that this girl did not.. Also, another weird thing has been going on. This girl that I met in Indy (which was freaking awesome by the way(indy)) has been calling me a lot- and I really don't like her at all either. She is a really attractive girl, but I just don't 'like' her.. Sometimes when she calls I just want to pick it up and yell; "I DON'T LIKE YOU!" and hang up. Oh well..
Speaking of Indy, it was great! I overcame lots of tempation! No drinking for me! I think Aaron and I were the only two who did not drink! Yay for us! We saw lots of AMAZING cars! It was truly amazing! I mean, there was literally BILLIONS of dollars sitting in the field. We also saw lots of drunk women. ..and I learned that if for some odd reason, you want to see a drunk womens boobs.........give them beads! ..I did not see one ugly woman there, it was great. I went broke that week though. That is the only part I regret.
Uhh, another thing that happened this year.......... Uh, Drew and I went to the fair. It was ok, she took me to see her pictures! I was VERY proud of her. She did an AWESOME job and won 2 1st place and 2 2nd places! They were all awesome pictures! We saw a band and hung out with her brother for a while..... then we did nothing. It sucked. I drove around and on the way to her home, I did not say one word to her. I was so upset. We cleared things up. .......I guess I expect too much out of her. I don't know... I guess from what happened months ago still hasn't passed me up, and I think of it as she should be drooling over me... But shes not like that, and I guess that is one thing I have to get used to. I saw Aaron and his girlfriend that he has known for like a month, and her and him have done more than Drew and I ever have. Not that that bothers me..but I miss the little things... Drew never held my hand and layed up agianst me.. I wanted that.. the little things that I never had, and felt like I should have.. Like I deserved something out of all of my efforts to make her happy. I guess I never did either. Oh well........ What else could I do. It's almost like she didn't want it.
You know, I was hesitant about even writting in this tonight, but after you get started, it just opens things up in your head, and make you want to vent. So I'm sorry if you are reading this and thinking I am a sad emo kid. Maybe I am deep inside.
Kyle Hart got out of jail the other day. He just called me today. We had a good conversation. He is supposed to call me back though. I worry about him a lot. I really like the kid, but I just wish he would realize what he is doing to himself. He is going to attempt to try to get back in school tommorrow. I hope he does. He really needs it. ..and a job. ..and no drugs.
Well, I can't think of too much else to write.. I have school tommorrow, and I am not excited about waking up so early. I won't have too much homework this semester, so I guess that is something to look forward to. I need prayer. I have been somewhat drifting away. Not really, but somewhat.. I don't know what it is that is pulling me away.. I think it is going to bed so early for school. Who knows. ..well.. I know I need to make time for God. I will have to start that soon. Tommorrow after work! Yes! Work, by the way, sucks.
"I've Given My Heart Away
To So Many Things
So Many Times I've Failed
Help Me Stop This Endless Cycle
Remind Me Of How It Can Be"
-Haste The Day
OH! I saw As I Lay Dying twice this summer, that was great! PEACE FO GOOD!