(no subject)
so.
she came around.
things are so fucked up.
now, i have to forget what happened, it didnt happen. we agreed we would, but i duno.. im going to try my god damned hardest, but i never ever suceed at things like this.
im a complete failure. i am a complete failure, i cant even function now. when things get hard.. down go the tablets, down goes the alcohol. i just cant cope.
i cant do essays, cant do sketches, cant do coursework. all i can do, is cry. my eyes are beginning to hurt so much from the tears, they i wish i could just fall asleep and never wake up away, i cant stand all this pain.
i just dont know what to do, when all i want, is not to be here. how can i do anything else? i cant concentrate, cant sit still. cant even think.
what is the point in life? why do we strive for things that we cannot each begin to partly achieve.
i thought everything was going to get better, i thought it was getting better. but now. i know, everything is so much worse than i could ever have imagined.
i cant cope with anything, nothing. i cant even attend school for a full day, what a fucking loser i am. cant even go to work. I CANT EVEN FUCKING HAVE A NORMAL FUCKING FRIENDSHIP.
"i am hopnig through the dark clouds, light shall break and bring a bright sky"
someone.
please.
make me go
away
she came around.
things are so fucked up.
now, i have to forget what happened, it didnt happen. we agreed we would, but i duno.. im going to try my god damned hardest, but i never ever suceed at things like this.
im a complete failure. i am a complete failure, i cant even function now. when things get hard.. down go the tablets, down goes the alcohol. i just cant cope.
i cant do essays, cant do sketches, cant do coursework. all i can do, is cry. my eyes are beginning to hurt so much from the tears, they i wish i could just fall asleep and never wake up away, i cant stand all this pain.
i just dont know what to do, when all i want, is not to be here. how can i do anything else? i cant concentrate, cant sit still. cant even think.
what is the point in life? why do we strive for things that we cannot each begin to partly achieve.
i thought everything was going to get better, i thought it was getting better. but now. i know, everything is so much worse than i could ever have imagined.
i cant cope with anything, nothing. i cant even attend school for a full day, what a fucking loser i am. cant even go to work. I CANT EVEN FUCKING HAVE A NORMAL FUCKING FRIENDSHIP.
"i am hopnig through the dark clouds, light shall break and bring a bright sky"
someone.
please.
make me go
away