(no subject)
there is so much drama happening now.
sarah wants to go to a foster home. she's been at the police station all day. sarah is my 11 year old sister who ran away on thursday, for those of you who don't know. i love her with all of my heart. she's my best friend and i never thought i'd loose her. she's the last person keeping me here.
chris was arrested on wednesday. he awoled from placement about a month ago. chris is my boyfriend - the most intelligent, kindhearted man i've ever met. all i want to do anymore is be around him. we don't even have to be touching or talking and i feel complete.
i've been at amber's all day. amber is the girl who 'stole' my last boyfriend, david. david is awesome. and amber, wow. we have so much in common it's bizarre. i love her and david. they're lovely.
jeremiah also asked me to marry him yesterday and run with him to ventura in november. after ben and crystal get married. i told him no. 1 - because jeremiah and i have a history of running together, and two - i have chris. i don't need jeremiah. i need C H R I S. and nobody else.
i don't know what to do anymore.
i have so much medication in my room.
it'd be so easy to swallow it all and end this bullshit.
so easy.
sometimes, i wonder why i don't.
FUCK ME.
my name is jessika and i am fourteen. i smoke pot, ciggarettes, crank, and i drink. i've run away twice. i've been in a mental hospital. i go to therapy ever tuesday, and i am homeschooled. i cannot stand public school - i am the most paranoid little fuck you will ever meet.
i hallucinate.
my best friends live on the wire across the world. i am attached to the computer most of the time. but lately i leave because i cannot handle this place. it is so fucked up here. everyone is dying. everyone is leaving. i cannot handle it. i cannot handle change. i cannot handle violence. i cannot handle life.
i am obsessed with music.
i play guitar.
i took a break from watching this to see a thing on tv.
they were talking about 'the wall'.
i LOVE pink floyd more than you could ever imagine. i grew up on floyd, my baby sister will grow up on floyd, my children, their children, their children's children WILL GROW UP ON FLOYD. ZEPPELIN. MORRISON. BOWIE.
MORRISSEY.
DEPECHE MODE.
THE CURE.
THE CULT.
someone please shoot me and my drug-infected mind.
i will give you a cookie.
so this is it.
now you get to decide whether you want to add me or not.
why add?
because this is FRIENDS ONLY.
sarah wants to go to a foster home. she's been at the police station all day. sarah is my 11 year old sister who ran away on thursday, for those of you who don't know. i love her with all of my heart. she's my best friend and i never thought i'd loose her. she's the last person keeping me here.
chris was arrested on wednesday. he awoled from placement about a month ago. chris is my boyfriend - the most intelligent, kindhearted man i've ever met. all i want to do anymore is be around him. we don't even have to be touching or talking and i feel complete.
i've been at amber's all day. amber is the girl who 'stole' my last boyfriend, david. david is awesome. and amber, wow. we have so much in common it's bizarre. i love her and david. they're lovely.
jeremiah also asked me to marry him yesterday and run with him to ventura in november. after ben and crystal get married. i told him no. 1 - because jeremiah and i have a history of running together, and two - i have chris. i don't need jeremiah. i need C H R I S. and nobody else.
i don't know what to do anymore.
i have so much medication in my room.
it'd be so easy to swallow it all and end this bullshit.
so easy.
sometimes, i wonder why i don't.
FUCK ME.
my name is jessika and i am fourteen. i smoke pot, ciggarettes, crank, and i drink. i've run away twice. i've been in a mental hospital. i go to therapy ever tuesday, and i am homeschooled. i cannot stand public school - i am the most paranoid little fuck you will ever meet.
i hallucinate.
my best friends live on the wire across the world. i am attached to the computer most of the time. but lately i leave because i cannot handle this place. it is so fucked up here. everyone is dying. everyone is leaving. i cannot handle it. i cannot handle change. i cannot handle violence. i cannot handle life.
i am obsessed with music.
i play guitar.
i took a break from watching this to see a thing on tv.
they were talking about 'the wall'.
i LOVE pink floyd more than you could ever imagine. i grew up on floyd, my baby sister will grow up on floyd, my children, their children, their children's children WILL GROW UP ON FLOYD. ZEPPELIN. MORRISON. BOWIE.
MORRISSEY.
DEPECHE MODE.
THE CURE.
THE CULT.
someone please shoot me and my drug-infected mind.
i will give you a cookie.
so this is it.
now you get to decide whether you want to add me or not.
why add?
because this is FRIENDS ONLY.