Carpet Crumbs, Fried Chips & Warped Broomsticks
It's true that you'll never know someone entirely. And even then, why would you want to know someone that well? Sick of surprises, are we?! Or even learning something and then thinking, "well shitty dicks, ain't that somethin'?!" It's always cheese and crackers when you have one of those moments.
I was sitting on a sofa with my hands down my pants and "Smiles" was reading a book about slap-fighting your congressman. We started chatting the pro's and con's about sniffing asses as a form of picking up signals when we got on the subject of college times. Turns out "Smiles" was just like me. Drinkin', smokin', hugs, rock 'n' roll, bong-loading pure clumps of cat litter for that diamond fresh taste. Shit, made me wish "Smiles" and I had gone to the same college. It was fun Paddy-Cakin' past times, and what's more fun than that?! "MILLER TIME!!"
Everything was peachy-keen, but then I heard the 400 Blows and Weedeater didn't make it to Flagstaff. I was about to sit down on the toilet and cry until I saw all my favorite Pokemon characters there: "Landice," "Spicole," "Sash," "Tickle," "Wave Rick," "Coach," "Goody," "Quarry," "Sista Sista" and those really rare ones you see but are hard to capture.
(NOTE: I actually ended up sitting on the toilet crying a Snickers bar and "Meg Keg 'O Beer" walked in on me. It actually made my night moreso after I battled them Pokemon's!)
I woke up the next morning and decided I was through leaving my broomstick adapters at my friend "Chilldo's" house. I realized once I got them home that the soft, electrical innards had heat-stroke and the broomsticks themselves were a little warped. Rumplestiltskin is charging me $50. Not too shabby I'd say. Still, I'm plenty pissed at "Chilldo" for getting beer stains and dirt all over the adapters. Leaving them there was my fault, but that doesn't mean someone has the right o use them as a coaster or an ashtray.
If that wasn't bad enough, my computer fried my chips instead of baking them to a nice temperature. Now I have to yell at my computer like a defective Steve Urkel Doll until it starts talking my language again.
I wanna eat some mushrooms and watch the new Transformers movies. I hope that Shiaf LeBouf punk gets fondled by Bumblebee and then punted over a freeway by Star Scream.