Well I'm Sitting Alone Thinking About It All Over Coffee
so i just got back from hanging out with krystina. and we had a "bawlfest". eventhough she did most of the crying i knew how she felt. and i cried on my way home ... and i kinda still am.
this winter i pretty much had everything.
..the best roommates anyone could ask for.
..a bestfriend who was there for me whenever.
..great boyfriend.
..and i was back in school again.
i was pretty much on cloud nine and was loving every minute of it.
then summer came. and everything went to shit.
..i lost a boyfriend
..i lost a potential boyfriend .. because i said the wrong thing.
..i lost my roommates
..my bestfriend and i drifted apart.
basically i fell off of cloud nine and fell back into reality fast ... hard ... and still have a bump on my head the size of texas.
i thought this summer was gonna ROCK! partying it up with the roommates ... meeting new people ... making new friendships ... all while having a cute boy by my side. i thought i was so far from rock bottom that i would never be there. little did i know that's where i was headed.
i eventually became the most disliked person in this shitty town because of a few fuck-ups on my part. i'm not so much anymore ... and i don't ever wanna be again. i apologized and some forgave. and i'm rebuilding those friendships slowly ... but surely. others are pretty content on hating me. and i hate that. i hate that there is someone ... four hours away ... that i was once close to for six months that hates me. i know ... they're four hours away why should i care that they hate me ... i don't know i just do. i guess because i was really looking forward to becoming this person's friend but i guess now i won't ever get that opportunity. at one point in time i had some pretty strong feelings for this person and eventhough they're not as strong as they once were i would still like to be friends with them. but i'm not gonna try to be friends with someone who has no intentions on being my friend.
i would really like for this person to read this so he could know that he did have an effect on me and that i'm sorry for whatever it was that i did and that i want to be nothing more but his friend and that if ever needs someone to talk to i am here. i'm just a phone call away.
basically what i'm saying is ... if you feel like you have everything you could ever want in life ... don't take it for granted coz' one wrong choice and you could end up like me with a big ass knot on the side of your head that won't go away. and hurts everytime you think about that one thing you fucked up on.
k i guess that's it.
if it doesn't make sense ... sorry
it is 345 in the morning.
<3 Josie
this winter i pretty much had everything.
..the best roommates anyone could ask for.
..a bestfriend who was there for me whenever.
..great boyfriend.
..and i was back in school again.
i was pretty much on cloud nine and was loving every minute of it.
then summer came. and everything went to shit.
..i lost a boyfriend
..i lost a potential boyfriend .. because i said the wrong thing.
..i lost my roommates
..my bestfriend and i drifted apart.
basically i fell off of cloud nine and fell back into reality fast ... hard ... and still have a bump on my head the size of texas.
i thought this summer was gonna ROCK! partying it up with the roommates ... meeting new people ... making new friendships ... all while having a cute boy by my side. i thought i was so far from rock bottom that i would never be there. little did i know that's where i was headed.
i eventually became the most disliked person in this shitty town because of a few fuck-ups on my part. i'm not so much anymore ... and i don't ever wanna be again. i apologized and some forgave. and i'm rebuilding those friendships slowly ... but surely. others are pretty content on hating me. and i hate that. i hate that there is someone ... four hours away ... that i was once close to for six months that hates me. i know ... they're four hours away why should i care that they hate me ... i don't know i just do. i guess because i was really looking forward to becoming this person's friend but i guess now i won't ever get that opportunity. at one point in time i had some pretty strong feelings for this person and eventhough they're not as strong as they once were i would still like to be friends with them. but i'm not gonna try to be friends with someone who has no intentions on being my friend.
i would really like for this person to read this so he could know that he did have an effect on me and that i'm sorry for whatever it was that i did and that i want to be nothing more but his friend and that if ever needs someone to talk to i am here. i'm just a phone call away.
basically what i'm saying is ... if you feel like you have everything you could ever want in life ... don't take it for granted coz' one wrong choice and you could end up like me with a big ass knot on the side of your head that won't go away. and hurts everytime you think about that one thing you fucked up on.
k i guess that's it.
if it doesn't make sense ... sorry
it is 345 in the morning.
<3 Josie