omg an update. D:
I don't even know anymore. So much shit has been going on... in my life, and in the life of close friends. Sometimes, I’m not even sure how to handle it. Most things have settled down and gotten better for everyone else, but my own problems still persist.
I’ve posted news of this before... and it wasn't happening then, but it is now. My parents made news of moving to Texas official a few weeks ago. I should be leaving around December/January... and it's so fucking depressing. On top of that... When I was talking to my dad just now... I mentioned that I wanted to go get my teeth cleaned. Routine, right? Well, I just asked him when he's free to take me. Then he just says, "Whenever I’m free, I need to get a surgery to get this bump off my neck." I ask, what bump? "This tumor." ... my eyes started tearing, but what I don't get is, if he knew it was there, why didn't he try to get it out earlier? What if it progresses into something worse? =/ I don't know... I’m glad everyone else's troubles are gone... but mine don't seem to be leaving... more things seem to be coming. I’m not as happy as I act. My friends mention things that could be done to cheer them up, and if I can, I do it for them. But I don't even know what would cheer me up now. There isn't anything purchasable for me to ask for.
... I don't remember when I typed that^^ =/ ... but here's a real post. D:
Hm, since my last entry... I'm no longer a full time student. Jon came home from camp for a little while... but I didn't get to see him. :( I quit my job. And I love my friends so so so so so much more. Oh, and I'm moving for sure now. :O(
I have become such a bad student. I've dropped out of my philosophy class, and that was because there was no way that I could've passed with anything higher than a D. ... and that was still unlikely. Then a few weeks later, I got dropped out of my English class because I missed too many days. wtf? ... sigh. I don't even know anymore. I'm doing ALRIGHT in my other classes, but that isn't really enough. Though, I'm starting to think that any attempts I'm making academically are going to waste because I might have to start all over.
From what I'm aware... I'm going to leave ~December 29-31. Somewhere between those days. I can't believe that I'm actually moving. Honestly, I've been so numb about the whole idea for so long now... The moment that I knew for sure I was moving, I completely broke down. I hadn't cried that hard in the longest time. After I was done with all that crying, I had tried so hard to convince my dad to let me stay for school... I failed. I ended up getting into a heated argument with him and he made everything that was wrong with our family my fault because I wanted to finish high school here. I don't really feel like talking about what happened, because the ones that matter already know... but the time in which I have left here is quickly depreciating... I've been trying to make the best of my time here-- spending as much of my time with my friends as I possibly can.
The friends I have are a few of the most important people to me. [Sort of] like what Eddie was saying the other night... my friends ARE my family. My family isn't enough for me. Constantly, I am alone and depressed at home. My family is here, but they don't support or comfort me when I need them most. My friends are the ones that are always there for me. I've chosen to have them in my life, and I refuse to have them taken away from me. I have to move, but I'm going to be coming home to California as much as I possibly can, or afford to. Amtrak anyone? :D ... 38hr train rides. .___.
As far as I know, I'm not going to be going to school next semester. This is a huge SIGH to me. I use school as a tool to get out of my house... now what do I do? I think I'm going to try to convince my grandparents to buy me a ticket to go to the east coast so I can visit my cousins. My uncle will spoil me. :) and my cousin said that she'll take me out to have some fun for once. I miss her, it's been years. We used to be really close... and then she grew up and started college. Now I'M in college! ... sort of... LOL. And then while I'm on that side of the country I'll make an attempt to visit Vivian, even though I hate her. LOL LOL LOL. I miss my 'sister.' :O( WHATEVS. She's coming back to visit a bit before I leave. Well, this is just a plan. I don't know if it'll actually happen... but I want it to.
Anyway, back to my friends... I love them. It had taken such a long time for me to realize who my friends really are... and they're the same people I praised in my last entry. Jinian, Eddie, Kieu, and Ronald. I LOVE THEM SO MUCH I DON'T WANT TO LEAVE. OMG OMG OMG. :O( Well, mostly it's just Jinian, Eddie, and Kieu. I don't even know what's up with Ronald anymore. We don't talk as much... and it kinda makes me sad. I mean, sometimes he's an asshole and I hate him... but I love the guy to death. ... whatevs. Jinian + Thuy = Kenya Krew??? omg. We surround ourselves with cute stuff. We constantly speak in internetz. We're so gay we're actually married. Well, according to Facebook. ;D My crush on Eddie is over... LOL. I love the guy way more now though. :) Oh, in addition to these said persons... Rami and Mariella started hanging out with us more. :D yayy! Everything is more fun with more friends. Feurene and Kevin are still my listed best-friends. I hardly ever see them though. :O( Jinian and Eddie are getting up there too. Well, Jinian is a best friend. We've established this a while back. She completes me. Everything is so much more fun with her. :)
I'm tired of typing... here are a few links for pictures. I uploaded them to facebook from a while back til now. :)
Kimberly's Birthday Dinner.
Random Hanging Outtings with teh friendz!!!
Halloween 2007. I was a cat. LULz.
I’ve posted news of this before... and it wasn't happening then, but it is now. My parents made news of moving to Texas official a few weeks ago. I should be leaving around December/January... and it's so fucking depressing. On top of that... When I was talking to my dad just now... I mentioned that I wanted to go get my teeth cleaned. Routine, right? Well, I just asked him when he's free to take me. Then he just says, "Whenever I’m free, I need to get a surgery to get this bump off my neck." I ask, what bump? "This tumor." ... my eyes started tearing, but what I don't get is, if he knew it was there, why didn't he try to get it out earlier? What if it progresses into something worse? =/ I don't know... I’m glad everyone else's troubles are gone... but mine don't seem to be leaving... more things seem to be coming. I’m not as happy as I act. My friends mention things that could be done to cheer them up, and if I can, I do it for them. But I don't even know what would cheer me up now. There isn't anything purchasable for me to ask for.
... I don't remember when I typed that^^ =/ ... but here's a real post. D:
Hm, since my last entry... I'm no longer a full time student. Jon came home from camp for a little while... but I didn't get to see him. :( I quit my job. And I love my friends so so so so so much more. Oh, and I'm moving for sure now. :O(
I have become such a bad student. I've dropped out of my philosophy class, and that was because there was no way that I could've passed with anything higher than a D. ... and that was still unlikely. Then a few weeks later, I got dropped out of my English class because I missed too many days. wtf? ... sigh. I don't even know anymore. I'm doing ALRIGHT in my other classes, but that isn't really enough. Though, I'm starting to think that any attempts I'm making academically are going to waste because I might have to start all over.
From what I'm aware... I'm going to leave ~December 29-31. Somewhere between those days. I can't believe that I'm actually moving. Honestly, I've been so numb about the whole idea for so long now... The moment that I knew for sure I was moving, I completely broke down. I hadn't cried that hard in the longest time. After I was done with all that crying, I had tried so hard to convince my dad to let me stay for school... I failed. I ended up getting into a heated argument with him and he made everything that was wrong with our family my fault because I wanted to finish high school here. I don't really feel like talking about what happened, because the ones that matter already know... but the time in which I have left here is quickly depreciating... I've been trying to make the best of my time here-- spending as much of my time with my friends as I possibly can.
The friends I have are a few of the most important people to me. [Sort of] like what Eddie was saying the other night... my friends ARE my family. My family isn't enough for me. Constantly, I am alone and depressed at home. My family is here, but they don't support or comfort me when I need them most. My friends are the ones that are always there for me. I've chosen to have them in my life, and I refuse to have them taken away from me. I have to move, but I'm going to be coming home to California as much as I possibly can, or afford to. Amtrak anyone? :D ... 38hr train rides. .___.
As far as I know, I'm not going to be going to school next semester. This is a huge SIGH to me. I use school as a tool to get out of my house... now what do I do? I think I'm going to try to convince my grandparents to buy me a ticket to go to the east coast so I can visit my cousins. My uncle will spoil me. :) and my cousin said that she'll take me out to have some fun for once. I miss her, it's been years. We used to be really close... and then she grew up and started college. Now I'M in college! ... sort of... LOL. And then while I'm on that side of the country I'll make an attempt to visit Vivian, even though I hate her. LOL LOL LOL. I miss my 'sister.' :O( WHATEVS. She's coming back to visit a bit before I leave. Well, this is just a plan. I don't know if it'll actually happen... but I want it to.
Anyway, back to my friends... I love them. It had taken such a long time for me to realize who my friends really are... and they're the same people I praised in my last entry. Jinian, Eddie, Kieu, and Ronald. I LOVE THEM SO MUCH I DON'T WANT TO LEAVE. OMG OMG OMG. :O( Well, mostly it's just Jinian, Eddie, and Kieu. I don't even know what's up with Ronald anymore. We don't talk as much... and it kinda makes me sad. I mean, sometimes he's an asshole and I hate him... but I love the guy to death. ... whatevs. Jinian + Thuy = Kenya Krew??? omg. We surround ourselves with cute stuff. We constantly speak in internetz. We're so gay we're actually married. Well, according to Facebook. ;D My crush on Eddie is over... LOL. I love the guy way more now though. :) Oh, in addition to these said persons... Rami and Mariella started hanging out with us more. :D yayy! Everything is more fun with more friends. Feurene and Kevin are still my listed best-friends. I hardly ever see them though. :O( Jinian and Eddie are getting up there too. Well, Jinian is a best friend. We've established this a while back. She completes me. Everything is so much more fun with her. :)
I'm tired of typing... here are a few links for pictures. I uploaded them to facebook from a while back til now. :)
Kimberly's Birthday Dinner.
Random Hanging Outtings with teh friendz!!!
Halloween 2007. I was a cat. LULz.