is there anything worth waiting for, worth living for, worth dying for.
its been a one of a kind day.
in the barn at 5am n had company. some kid that his daddy punished him by waking his ass up at 4 in making him work in wht barn with me. its b4 6:30 i dont fction b4 6:30 honestly no one is ever around at that hour i dont speak or respond but today i had to n had to do it without coffee, FUCK. so i was snappy. i was irritable. add some pms to that n you have a not to happy ashley. oh and a not to happy ashley got a 'if a girl can do it so can i, but i can do it better' boy around her. yeah not gonna work. i tel him dont do this do that stay away from that horse he will hurt you i have scars to prove it. but does anyone listen to ashley? nope. he fucking des tha opposite of what i say. yeah piss me off. i was so happy when a) i threw somehitng at him (small n couldnt hurt him) b) he noticed his 'fuck my k swiss's i just fucking bought them yesterday' shoes were ruined (not my falut your going to a barn dont wear new white shoes) & c) he left. all by 8 am.
went into another ocd ashley cleaning spree. (i can NOT stand a bathroom that isnt scrubbed weekly. yes i may be crazy but im clean =D lol) found soo much shit when i clean my room. i mean i found old milo posters *orgasm* lol. a photo album mom made right b4 she died. (i cried the entire time i read it) money (yes! lol) old notes hehe and pictures! haha proof not all ex's look like fat ugly seniors no one likes!!! lmfao. &&& saw a movie idk what it was called but it was so fucked up a typical only in jersey movie. lol.
oh! started the english essay. it amuses me. 'goodbye wearing party dresses while walking in the rain. goodbye AIM, you brought me so much good but still some bad *ahem the weirdo 21 year old meh he got scared away though. lol* goodbye fridgid walks and running into store to get warm. So long yellow binder and the pages of notes you hold. *shit i need to think of a place to hide that over the summer. haha too much incriminationg stuff in there. lol <3 * Goodbye being cold, bored, or sore. Goodbye silly string and ambusing people. Goodbye car chases. Goodbye snow. Goodbye all the receses that he collected for me *ah i <3 halloween got candy i wanted without having to trick or treat, but in self defense i was on the phone with him as i made him get me candy. stupid pageant fucked up my bday/halloween. * Goodbye chemisrty and the formulas i do not know. Goodbye warm rainy nights and dancing inthe puddles. *everyone should try this lol * Goodbye walking and runnnig to clear your head. Goodbye randomness. ' yeah thats the start of it. all * * parts arent actually in the paper though. lol. uh dur. i actually liked this project. =D its nice cause if i were dead n saying bye its actually stuff id miss. im a loser i know. =P