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[__mouse]

My family has forgiven John for what he did to me back then

Comments

Re: I hope this helps more than it makes you angry.

[__mouse]

It doesn't make me angr at all, sugar, and I appreciate the shit out of it. I certainly plan to try hard, though the confidence that I'm capable pales as time goes on, and soon the money for therapy (which is what I need even more than anxiety drugs and motivation or money for other shit) won't be a problem anymore and I'll finally be able to fill my days with normal activities instead of nameless forboding...it's just priceless to me to simply be understood and for someone to care to understand it is hard and I'm not taking the lazy easy road, but merely trying to stabilize myself enough to normalize myself and live my damn life, which as you know is all I want! It's just (as you well know) so hard and obnoxious and hurtful to be presumed upon and doubted when you're giving it your best effort just to not curl up into a small ball and hold your middle finger up to the world! Especially when I love their son so much and do so muh for him and tolerate so much from him and considering the insane whore-bitches they had to dea with before me...I just wish the man I love's family would love and accept and encourage me the way the Lumans do! I understand why they're concerned and bothered, but some understanding has to come into play on their part too...it just really hurts me to be misunderstood and misinterpreted by them, especially because they don't realize John is way more a party monster and disfunctional in his own, and in my ipinion, much more destructive ways...
Also, someone told me something hilarious and/or rad about Germany I can't remember at the moment, but I was like MUST TELL B IMMEDIATELY...hoping I recall...

Re: I hope this helps more than it makes you angry.

[___brianalolz]

I'm in a similar position with you in life right now. Everyone I meet over here asks me how long I'm going to stay, how I plan to get residency, where I go to school, where I work, what my plans for life are and I don't have shit to answer. It doesn't make you a piece of shit to not have a plan, it makes you a piece of shit to not want one. My main point in that whole big long shannegan post is that you have to take baby steps and try to accomplish shit, even if it's little shit. I have a long list of things that I want to do and every day I put it off for another day. It depresses the hell out of me and that is just a prime example of the emotional toll that being unproductive takes.

My advice with John's family is to ignore them, because as badly as it hurts when someone else puts you down, they don't really even know what's up and I believe there is no better feeling than proving them wrong. It won't take you long to do that if you set yo mind to it.

Re: I hope this helps more than it makes you angry.

[__mouse]

I'm using my mee-maw's xmas money she gave me to get my ged. IN YOUR FACE, H8-ER'S!!!! hahah I feel so white trash