(no subject)
Things went from AWESOME to shitty back to awesome and on down again.
Even if I sound pathetic, I still miss John like crazy. I don't know what to make out of it. I didn't do anything wrong for us to hate each other. And maybe if I did, I would have no idea because we still haven't spoken in over a month or two. It's just real great how he can go from kissing you and telling you that he loves you back to, "I hate you, I want nothing to do with you." It seems that alot of people do that, it's bullshit.
I love him with all my heart, and it breaks my heart that I can't still be his best friend and vice versa. It breaks my heart watching him go down a path that I don't want him to. It's hard to watch your friends go down, especially when you can do absolutely nothing about it. I miss him like crazy, and maybe Jessie is right, maybe he's trying to forget me, but I don't want to forget him. I do and I don't. I loved the times we spent together, and I wouldn't trade any moment of it for anything else. He was the best thing in my life, and I still love him. Even after the shit he did, all the lies he told, it's pathetic on my part but, I'd still take him back, because I believe he could better himself, that he could improve if he had the right push.
Now, Justin has a girlfriend, and man do I hate it. That's another thing: He finds out about whats-his-name and fucking has a girlfriend the next week? Pretty fucking retarded. Now, I lost my other best friend, because he has no time for anything else. Whatever Justin.
I leave for DC tomorrow. I'm not excited at all.
Oh, and for you all people complaining I wasn't at band practice: Shut the fuck up. You don't know why I wasn't there, so shut the hell up. Sorry if I had a more important thing to do than sit at band. I wasn't sleeping.
Even if I sound pathetic, I still miss John like crazy. I don't know what to make out of it. I didn't do anything wrong for us to hate each other. And maybe if I did, I would have no idea because we still haven't spoken in over a month or two. It's just real great how he can go from kissing you and telling you that he loves you back to, "I hate you, I want nothing to do with you." It seems that alot of people do that, it's bullshit.
I love him with all my heart, and it breaks my heart that I can't still be his best friend and vice versa. It breaks my heart watching him go down a path that I don't want him to. It's hard to watch your friends go down, especially when you can do absolutely nothing about it. I miss him like crazy, and maybe Jessie is right, maybe he's trying to forget me, but I don't want to forget him. I do and I don't. I loved the times we spent together, and I wouldn't trade any moment of it for anything else. He was the best thing in my life, and I still love him. Even after the shit he did, all the lies he told, it's pathetic on my part but, I'd still take him back, because I believe he could better himself, that he could improve if he had the right push.
Now, Justin has a girlfriend, and man do I hate it. That's another thing: He finds out about whats-his-name and fucking has a girlfriend the next week? Pretty fucking retarded. Now, I lost my other best friend, because he has no time for anything else. Whatever Justin.
I leave for DC tomorrow. I'm not excited at all.
Oh, and for you all people complaining I wasn't at band practice: Shut the fuck up. You don't know why I wasn't there, so shut the hell up. Sorry if I had a more important thing to do than sit at band. I wasn't sleeping.