Help?

[fallstoofast]

Ok, so I have a really really complicated question for you all.  Well... actually, the question is quite simple, it's the scenario that's complicated.  I warn you there is a LOT of reading involved in this, so don't click the cuts if you're not prepared.  I'm just not sure who else to ask except a therapist and - quite frankly - I'm not prepared to pay for one.  These are all links to my personal journal entries, just so you know.  As you can see from the dates, this has been going on for quite some time.  Anyways, here we go...

The Beginnings - 12/11/05

Negative Reactions - 12/15/05

You Keep Hell Alive - 1/4/06

Phone Calls - 2/9/06

Dear Abby - 2/11/06

Last Time I Do This - 2/17/06

I Can't Be Your Friend - 2/19/06

The World as Marcos Sees It - 2/25/06

My question is this: What the hell should I do?

(Cross-Posted, I'm sorry!!!)