to who i may concern:
i don't know here to begin. i'm frustrated and alone, but why? i have a boyfriend and stuff but i lost everything else...i lost the people i needed or say the least the people that have helped me become stable with myself, now its all come back.
maybe im just stubborn or selfish. and i didnt really lose these people but i lost my best friend, daniel ( who screwed me over and used me like a piece of meat ), Ricky ( the one who would come late at night when i was crying about how much i hated my life and sat with me threw dexters funeral..he's gone to flordia ) and daniel, he's gone to brazil and wont be back till im 20 something...im loosing it guys, i seriously am again.. im so fucking alone...why can't i be happy wiht myself. i wish i was pretty like all the other girls i look up too. Cassidy, Melina, Jennabie, arugh, i hate it...i've been starving myself since school started and this weekend..i lost it..i ate everything so fast that my mom was flipping out...and i feel fat once again..beauty doesnt exist in me..maybe this will all fly over soon..but i've been feeling shitty all week, just good at covering it up...and i love it how i vent and vent so someone can help me but all they do is just talk about how life is good. i KNOW ITS GOOD...
this is my live journal and if u think that im just craving attention..just shut the fuck up and go away..
'here comes the rain again, falling from the stars. Drenched in my pain again, becomming who we are'