(no subject)
sometimes i think i feel things more intensely than others, and i worry that it will be bad for me.
i tried to explain to brian how badly i want to move to myrtle beach. it's not just a longing for the beach, for the good weather, for the reasons that everyone wants. down there, even if i have the same problems that i do up here, i feel happier, healthier, just better internally. and when i'm not there, i miss it like i'm missing a person that i am good friends with and can only see once a year. it's not just about missing a place. sometimes it's so intense, my longing to be there, that i seriously consider just driving down there, getting a job and apartment on the fly, and making it work. the only thing that holds me back is my feeling of responsibility to my job.. not brian, not my parents, not my friends.
it's something that i've been thinking a lot about lately, how i hate this place and how sad i am here. and how i just feel like i belong there. and how i have no fucking clue what to do about that.
i tried to explain to brian how badly i want to move to myrtle beach. it's not just a longing for the beach, for the good weather, for the reasons that everyone wants. down there, even if i have the same problems that i do up here, i feel happier, healthier, just better internally. and when i'm not there, i miss it like i'm missing a person that i am good friends with and can only see once a year. it's not just about missing a place. sometimes it's so intense, my longing to be there, that i seriously consider just driving down there, getting a job and apartment on the fly, and making it work. the only thing that holds me back is my feeling of responsibility to my job.. not brian, not my parents, not my friends.
it's something that i've been thinking a lot about lately, how i hate this place and how sad i am here. and how i just feel like i belong there. and how i have no fucking clue what to do about that.