Tuesday afternoon- 16:32
I'm so bored. I wish I could get out more but...no...Billy has to stay home and be a good boy today, no bottle, no angst, sit at home and relax and be a good little boy for Jake.
I sigh as I check my watch for the thousandth time today, 4:32...ten minutes later than the last time I checked.
God, if I'd have known rehab would be this boring I would have been more careful not to let Jake find out. Damnit. Sighing again I fish my personal walkman from my bag and flip it on- just the one song in there, one that means alot to me in my own sad and pathetic way.
And I can't help but sing along, I can't help it, anyone could easily hear- I'm loud enough, and that would probably embaress me (that naked feeling of them having seen a part of me that wasn't to be shown just yet).
But singing is in my soul, in my blood, and the lyrics just flow.
And I'd give up forever to touch you
Cause I know that you feel me somehow
You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be
And I don't want to go home right now
And all I can taste is this moment
And all I can breathe is your life
And sooner or later it's over
I just don't want to miss you tonight
And I don't want the world to see me
Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am
And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming
Or the moment of truth in your lies
When everything feels like the movies
Yeah you bleed just to know you're alive
(his voice gives me shivers, and just for a moment my voice stutters and shifts, it always does that to me, the voice I want whispering in my ear...amazing, but I carry on nonetheless and sing because I need to- because singing heals the soul)
And I don't want the world to see me
Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am
(lost in the music that comes between this part and the next, violins, guitar solo, anticipation. And her voice floats back to the song. Quickly followed by his.)
And I don't want the world to see me
Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am....
And I don't want the world to see me
Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am...
I just want you to know who I am...
I just want you to know who I am...
I just want you to know who I am........
The cheers and the clapping fill my ears- and just for a second, it's easy to believe they're for me.
song= Goo goo dolls sung live by Avril Lavigne and Johnny Rzeznick- Iris
I sigh as I check my watch for the thousandth time today, 4:32...ten minutes later than the last time I checked.
God, if I'd have known rehab would be this boring I would have been more careful not to let Jake find out. Damnit. Sighing again I fish my personal walkman from my bag and flip it on- just the one song in there, one that means alot to me in my own sad and pathetic way.
And I can't help but sing along, I can't help it, anyone could easily hear- I'm loud enough, and that would probably embaress me (that naked feeling of them having seen a part of me that wasn't to be shown just yet).
But singing is in my soul, in my blood, and the lyrics just flow.
And I'd give up forever to touch you
Cause I know that you feel me somehow
You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be
And I don't want to go home right now
And all I can taste is this moment
And all I can breathe is your life
And sooner or later it's over
I just don't want to miss you tonight
And I don't want the world to see me
Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am
And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming
Or the moment of truth in your lies
When everything feels like the movies
Yeah you bleed just to know you're alive
(his voice gives me shivers, and just for a moment my voice stutters and shifts, it always does that to me, the voice I want whispering in my ear...amazing, but I carry on nonetheless and sing because I need to- because singing heals the soul)
And I don't want the world to see me
Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am
(lost in the music that comes between this part and the next, violins, guitar solo, anticipation. And her voice floats back to the song. Quickly followed by his.)
And I don't want the world to see me
Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am....
And I don't want the world to see me
Cause I don't think that they'd understand
When everything's made to be broken
I just want you to know who I am...
I just want you to know who I am...
I just want you to know who I am...
I just want you to know who I am........
The cheers and the clapping fill my ears- and just for a second, it's easy to believe they're for me.
song= Goo goo dolls sung live by Avril Lavigne and Johnny Rzeznick- Iris