i dislike my classmates, for the most part. how could people be so ignorant?
So, I waited and waited for school to end.
And it didn't.
[I don't want the rain to ever stop.]
In every class, I loose myself completely in reading Pride and Prejudice, which is the only way i manage to survive school.
one week. one week and i will be in arizona. ONE WEEK until i am in arizona. <3. incredible.
from the second i got in the car, my mother and i began to fight. badly. and then carmen got involved and i yelled some explicitives at her, and screamed back at my mom who was following me around yelling in my face until i screamed at her enough to get her to leave the house. and she did.
and i went to sleep.
for a very, very long time.
i'm disoriented as i am after long naps.
i'm disoriented as i am after long fights.
[remember] she said my cousins couldn't come over, and i yelled at her "that's too fucking bad!"
that was the thing that got to me.
i have a way of controlling people when i really shouldn't be.
and i make my mother feel dumb and worthless, she says.
she doesn't realize, though, that that's how everyone else feels about me.
she doesn't realize her own daughter is fucked up enough to think so highly of herself.
all i want to do is go back to sleep, and i don't know what time it is, and almost forget where i am.
but once thing i do remember is that in the middle of my sleep, i was awoken by my mother telling me that my cousins are allowed over, but she is still angry with me, and very much so.
i think i told her to "shut up and fuck off".
in a way i feel sympathetic.
other than that, i feel apathy, which is a combination of emotions that make no sense,
but at the current time,
i cannot say i can make any more sense of my day.
where are you, meg & jess?<3
And it didn't.
[I don't want the rain to ever stop.]
In every class, I loose myself completely in reading Pride and Prejudice, which is the only way i manage to survive school.
one week. one week and i will be in arizona. ONE WEEK until i am in arizona. <3. incredible.
from the second i got in the car, my mother and i began to fight. badly. and then carmen got involved and i yelled some explicitives at her, and screamed back at my mom who was following me around yelling in my face until i screamed at her enough to get her to leave the house. and she did.
and i went to sleep.
for a very, very long time.
i'm disoriented as i am after long naps.
i'm disoriented as i am after long fights.
[remember] she said my cousins couldn't come over, and i yelled at her "that's too fucking bad!"
that was the thing that got to me.
i have a way of controlling people when i really shouldn't be.
and i make my mother feel dumb and worthless, she says.
she doesn't realize, though, that that's how everyone else feels about me.
she doesn't realize her own daughter is fucked up enough to think so highly of herself.
all i want to do is go back to sleep, and i don't know what time it is, and almost forget where i am.
but once thing i do remember is that in the middle of my sleep, i was awoken by my mother telling me that my cousins are allowed over, but she is still angry with me, and very much so.
i think i told her to "shut up and fuck off".
in a way i feel sympathetic.
other than that, i feel apathy, which is a combination of emotions that make no sense,
but at the current time,
i cannot say i can make any more sense of my day.
where are you, meg & jess?<3