(no subject)
I was working on my site, but we (ange and I) got to talking and it just started to hurt. that dull ache became an ulcer and it was just ungood.
things I'd never written before came out and it hurt to read it, and what hurt more was that I believe/d it.I just started crying and it felt so good to just cry and not be told to stop crying. granted, I didn't tell her I was sobbing like a baby, but it just felt so good to cry. I was hurting so I cried, and it felt like such a release. Tonight has just been shitty. That's the only way to explain it. So much emotional crap has been going on and built up inside of me, and it just hurt so much. It was great to cry and to not be told "oh, don't cry, it'll be o.k.". I don't care if it'll be o.k. right now I hurt and I deserve to cry.
Boys are taught that it's bad to cry. baloney. have you ever just had a good sob? yelled at the air, pretending it was -insert person here-? They'll never hear you.
I'm still sad. I'm still kind of hurt. I'm still kind of angry. But I feel an inner ball of goodness. I feel like I've accomplished something, and that means a lot to me, right now, because if I never have another night like tonight, it'll be too soon.
things I'd never written before came out and it hurt to read it, and what hurt more was that I believe/d it.I just started crying and it felt so good to just cry and not be told to stop crying. granted, I didn't tell her I was sobbing like a baby, but it just felt so good to cry. I was hurting so I cried, and it felt like such a release. Tonight has just been shitty. That's the only way to explain it. So much emotional crap has been going on and built up inside of me, and it just hurt so much. It was great to cry and to not be told "oh, don't cry, it'll be o.k.". I don't care if it'll be o.k. right now I hurt and I deserve to cry.
Boys are taught that it's bad to cry. baloney. have you ever just had a good sob? yelled at the air, pretending it was -insert person here-? They'll never hear you.
I'm still sad. I'm still kind of hurt. I'm still kind of angry. But I feel an inner ball of goodness. I feel like I've accomplished something, and that means a lot to me, right now, because if I never have another night like tonight, it'll be too soon.