(no subject)
i'm young and i am free
but i get tired and i get weak
i get lost and i can't sleep
but suddenly, suddenly...
how does it feel to be different from me?
are we the same?
how does it fucking feel?
today was a spectacularly fantastic day. no, seriously. it started out bad because i missed class this morning because i couldn't really get out of bed. ::note, i'm sorry heidi:: after all of that was over i went to grab a bite or like 39 to eat with everyone. good times.
lauren and boz and i almost got swept away from the wind during a mini storm we had. seriouly, i was rolling around on the ground. (i dare you to run under the water. ok!! whoa dude. i didn't even get wet!) sorry, random lauren fun. haha. mmm, pizza is good, and so is faygo that only costs a dollar from the dollar tree. is it a store or is it a tree? heeeelllooooo... ::pause:: kitty. (in purse formation)
omg, the JTT fan club is growing, i can't handle all this excitement. it makes me giddy like a little girl.
let me just say that william hung is also my inspiration. as anne and boz and i tailgate in the parking lot... rockin' out to william hung and playing "the cigarette game". if one could think of a better name for the game, there would be one. but alas, no one can.
rumors fucking blow, and meg is spreading quite a few of them. or her friends are? or... it's just amusing to me. if you don't fucking know me, don't fucking talk to my ex about me. period. and i know that her only goal in telling me that lauren thought i was hitting on her, and that she was telling meg's friends about it, was to get me to shy away and disoffilate myself from her and everyone else. fat chance in fucking hell. i love my friends. seriously, bitch... you better fucking watch out before they fucking take you out. you fucking love me? with your blown kisses as you come to see me when i'm at work? you reaching out to hug me in my room. the kiss you tried to give me before i pulled away? you wanted to spend the night in my room and then basically i'm kicked out of your car after i tell you that your friends make red flags fly up everywhere for me? you calling me not even 15 minutes later demanding to know where i was? you crying and sobbing and telling me that you're going home this instant because school doesn't matter? you listening to the cds i made you on fucking repeat, in and out of your car? you reading fucking livejournal, trying to find out... something? anything? and how about you irriating the fuck out of me? i feel so... so... fucking used? manipulated? trashed? broken? hurt? i don't know. it's a fucking mixture of all of these things. i have lost all emotion. i feel it. all i have is all i can give. i give it all to my friends and family. relationships be damned, for this moment. meg broke me, for now. i do apologize. i'll stick to sleeping in beds with my good and straight friend anne. and giving my hugs to lauren who deserves them. and spending all the damn time with bozzy that i fucking want. i'll stick to life now, a life without a relationship, and lots of friendship. a life without meg. go home. you fucking suck. go the fuck home. gimme 2 months to settle myself, we'll see where life takes us in the fall. friends? maybe. i don't fucking know. all i know now is that you need to hit the road, jack. and don't you come back.
whoa, now that i've gotten that out of my system.
i feel like shit.
whoa.
great.
but i get tired and i get weak
i get lost and i can't sleep
but suddenly, suddenly...
how does it feel to be different from me?
are we the same?
how does it fucking feel?
today was a spectacularly fantastic day. no, seriously. it started out bad because i missed class this morning because i couldn't really get out of bed. ::note, i'm sorry heidi:: after all of that was over i went to grab a bite or like 39 to eat with everyone. good times.
lauren and boz and i almost got swept away from the wind during a mini storm we had. seriouly, i was rolling around on the ground. (i dare you to run under the water. ok!! whoa dude. i didn't even get wet!) sorry, random lauren fun. haha. mmm, pizza is good, and so is faygo that only costs a dollar from the dollar tree. is it a store or is it a tree? heeeelllooooo... ::pause:: kitty. (in purse formation)
omg, the JTT fan club is growing, i can't handle all this excitement. it makes me giddy like a little girl.
let me just say that william hung is also my inspiration. as anne and boz and i tailgate in the parking lot... rockin' out to william hung and playing "the cigarette game". if one could think of a better name for the game, there would be one. but alas, no one can.
rumors fucking blow, and meg is spreading quite a few of them. or her friends are? or... it's just amusing to me. if you don't fucking know me, don't fucking talk to my ex about me. period. and i know that her only goal in telling me that lauren thought i was hitting on her, and that she was telling meg's friends about it, was to get me to shy away and disoffilate myself from her and everyone else. fat chance in fucking hell. i love my friends. seriously, bitch... you better fucking watch out before they fucking take you out. you fucking love me? with your blown kisses as you come to see me when i'm at work? you reaching out to hug me in my room. the kiss you tried to give me before i pulled away? you wanted to spend the night in my room and then basically i'm kicked out of your car after i tell you that your friends make red flags fly up everywhere for me? you calling me not even 15 minutes later demanding to know where i was? you crying and sobbing and telling me that you're going home this instant because school doesn't matter? you listening to the cds i made you on fucking repeat, in and out of your car? you reading fucking livejournal, trying to find out... something? anything? and how about you irriating the fuck out of me? i feel so... so... fucking used? manipulated? trashed? broken? hurt? i don't know. it's a fucking mixture of all of these things. i have lost all emotion. i feel it. all i have is all i can give. i give it all to my friends and family. relationships be damned, for this moment. meg broke me, for now. i do apologize. i'll stick to sleeping in beds with my good and straight friend anne. and giving my hugs to lauren who deserves them. and spending all the damn time with bozzy that i fucking want. i'll stick to life now, a life without a relationship, and lots of friendship. a life without meg. go home. you fucking suck. go the fuck home. gimme 2 months to settle myself, we'll see where life takes us in the fall. friends? maybe. i don't fucking know. all i know now is that you need to hit the road, jack. and don't you come back.
whoa, now that i've gotten that out of my system.
i feel like shit.
whoa.
great.