woah....
It's only been 6 months since I posted in this emo-tastic excuse for an online journal.
Update on what's new in the land of Casey:
+Realized how much of a douchebag Dan was, and got the shit out of that relationship. I was miserable, and denying that I was miserable (awesome?)
+Did really shitty in school this past semester... but it isn't the end of the world, I can bounce back from it, and I will. Cuz I rock!
+Decided to give OkCupid another try, despite the creepsters that loom all around it. I made a couple really great friends... and met an amazing guy. I know I'm already basically falling in love with him, but it's fantastic.
+Dan managed to get between me and Steph... but... We're friends again, closer than ever, and clearly lesbian for each other (not really, we just <3 each other more than words could ever express)
+Found out about how much more Dan lied to me than I thought he did... but got over it within 12 hours.... It's almost as if I had expected it? I certainly wasn't shocked. I was more irritated with having to deal with the bullshit again.
+I am loving my life so much lately. For once I'm genuinely happy, and it's not because of anyone other than myself. I mean, my friends make me happy, and Curt (amazing guy) makes me happy, but, I'm happy when I'm not around them as well. I'm just genuinely happy for once. It's a new feeling, and it's FANTASTIC!
+I've been writing in my real journal again (I started a new one.. figured I'd start fresh) and it's been so therapeutic.
+I for once feel as if I belong somewhere. I feel like I am where I should be, that I've found my friends that will last me a life time, that my future, my life in general, is finally starting to fall into place -- and it's beautiful.
+Though my relationship was nothing but bullshit, and being miserable and cheated on, and unloved... I am so much better for it. I learned so much about myself through the experience -- who I am and what I do and do not want. In a sense, I found myself, and I truly love who I've become. I feel as if the world is in my hands right now, I feel completely in control of my life.
+Did I mention how much I'm loving life?
Clearly, my life isn't perfect, no one's life is ever perfect. I could use more money... I would love to be able to afford to move out, live on my own (I am so ready for that..)... my dog died and that fucking sucks, I miss him every day still... I still have some trust issues from my last relationship, but, they're very self-preserving... and I know I will be able to ignore them eventually, when I know it's right.
I really am, genuinely, completely, unbreakably happy :)
Update on what's new in the land of Casey:
+Realized how much of a douchebag Dan was, and got the shit out of that relationship. I was miserable, and denying that I was miserable (awesome?)
+Did really shitty in school this past semester... but it isn't the end of the world, I can bounce back from it, and I will. Cuz I rock!
+Decided to give OkCupid another try, despite the creepsters that loom all around it. I made a couple really great friends... and met an amazing guy. I know I'm already basically falling in love with him, but it's fantastic.
+Dan managed to get between me and Steph... but... We're friends again, closer than ever, and clearly lesbian for each other (not really, we just <3 each other more than words could ever express)
+Found out about how much more Dan lied to me than I thought he did... but got over it within 12 hours.... It's almost as if I had expected it? I certainly wasn't shocked. I was more irritated with having to deal with the bullshit again.
+I am loving my life so much lately. For once I'm genuinely happy, and it's not because of anyone other than myself. I mean, my friends make me happy, and Curt (amazing guy) makes me happy, but, I'm happy when I'm not around them as well. I'm just genuinely happy for once. It's a new feeling, and it's FANTASTIC!
+I've been writing in my real journal again (I started a new one.. figured I'd start fresh) and it's been so therapeutic.
+I for once feel as if I belong somewhere. I feel like I am where I should be, that I've found my friends that will last me a life time, that my future, my life in general, is finally starting to fall into place -- and it's beautiful.
+Though my relationship was nothing but bullshit, and being miserable and cheated on, and unloved... I am so much better for it. I learned so much about myself through the experience -- who I am and what I do and do not want. In a sense, I found myself, and I truly love who I've become. I feel as if the world is in my hands right now, I feel completely in control of my life.
+Did I mention how much I'm loving life?
Clearly, my life isn't perfect, no one's life is ever perfect. I could use more money... I would love to be able to afford to move out, live on my own (I am so ready for that..)... my dog died and that fucking sucks, I miss him every day still... I still have some trust issues from my last relationship, but, they're very self-preserving... and I know I will be able to ignore them eventually, when I know it's right.
I really am, genuinely, completely, unbreakably happy :)