posted here and gj...
im kinda in shock that i just had the guts to do that.
me and todd are on a break.
he needs to think about whatever the hell happened tonight with him and meg.
and i need to think about what i really want and or need from him.
holy fucking crap and a half. of course. hoobastank-the reason comes on.
what the hell is this.
and what the hell have i done?
like okay. he would ALWAYS refer to her as bad news girlfriend.
i dont get it. really i dont.
but i have some of the best friends. i dont know what i would do if you guys werent there for me all the time
im kinda in shock that i just smiled. like i didnt cry that much. and i just smiled. smiled. me. wtf is going on.
I miss you. not enough to want you back, just enough for it to hurt
i really dont know. i want someone to love me. and tell me they love me. it was over a week. and it didnt even seem real.
No matter how hard you try to get over someone, you will still have some sort of feeling for them, remembering the ways things used to be, and how they are now. And you sometimes hope that the new person in their life was still you, and everything was how it used be, erasing all the bad things that happened.
i know how you feel. really i do. there are some people from my past i would love to have back. because looking back on things, when you are in love, you dont remember the bad. because the good outweighed the bad. but then.. i would start to think about you. and how deep everything we have/had is/was. maybe we dont think alike as much as i thought.
um. im really excited to go to california now.
okay. sometimes i get that he really does care. but he rarely says it. and sometimes doesnt show it. and i need that affection. i dont know how else to say it. ive said it before and nothing happened. at least after maybe a day. idk. i guess this is the point of the break. to figure out what i want in a relationship. and what i need for things to work.
Promise me that's all I want. Just a promise that you will never forget me. Tell me I changed you somehow. Let me know that I had an impact on your life. Promise me that you will always remember me. Losing you was hard enough, but I don't want to live knowing I meant absolutely nothing to you
Everything I am
And everything in me
Wants to be the one
You wanted me to be
I'll never let you down
Even if I could
I'd give up everything
If only for your good
So hold me when I'm here
Right me when I'm wrong
You can hold me when I'm scared
You won't always be there
So love me when I'm gone
allie.. i cant thank you enough... for understanding exactly what im going through. i love you-
alex.. im glad i surprise you. ;) thank you. for being there. i love you-
twin. yeah you know how cool you are. i love you-
well. okay. its 12:07. maybe i should get some sleep.
just kidding.
everything does happen for a reason. 'absence makes the heart grow fonder' we'll see about that one. obviously this cant go on forever. so maybe this is the point.. when i walk away.. and later ill find him again. maybe we arent to that point yet.
i deserve better than that. i deserve to be wanted. i want to be the one chased. not the one chasing. it always seems like i make the moves. and im sick of it.
ive finally made my decision. 2001 has been the best summer of my life so far. like yes. last summer was fun. i wont deny that having todd around was awesome. but the general atomosphere was so different. it was much more.. serious. hmpf. so me and lisa decided. we are going to control the bac. and this summer. and make it awesome. because its my last one.
Everyday I miss the you that I used to know.. before you let me down, before I let you go
okay. well i promise im done now. i really dont know what else to say. i want you to miss me. i want you to finally realize what you have taken for granted. and then show me that you have realized that.
thanks to everyone for being there. i love you guys so much <3
DUDE! THE OC TONITE WAS AWESOME! i cant wait til next week!
and on another random note- tomorrow is the last day before SPRING BREAK!!!
goodnight! :0)
me and todd are on a break.
he needs to think about whatever the hell happened tonight with him and meg.
and i need to think about what i really want and or need from him.
holy fucking crap and a half. of course. hoobastank-the reason comes on.
what the hell is this.
and what the hell have i done?
like okay. he would ALWAYS refer to her as bad news girlfriend.
i dont get it. really i dont.
but i have some of the best friends. i dont know what i would do if you guys werent there for me all the time
im kinda in shock that i just smiled. like i didnt cry that much. and i just smiled. smiled. me. wtf is going on.
I miss you. not enough to want you back, just enough for it to hurt
i really dont know. i want someone to love me. and tell me they love me. it was over a week. and it didnt even seem real.
No matter how hard you try to get over someone, you will still have some sort of feeling for them, remembering the ways things used to be, and how they are now. And you sometimes hope that the new person in their life was still you, and everything was how it used be, erasing all the bad things that happened.
i know how you feel. really i do. there are some people from my past i would love to have back. because looking back on things, when you are in love, you dont remember the bad. because the good outweighed the bad. but then.. i would start to think about you. and how deep everything we have/had is/was. maybe we dont think alike as much as i thought.
um. im really excited to go to california now.
okay. sometimes i get that he really does care. but he rarely says it. and sometimes doesnt show it. and i need that affection. i dont know how else to say it. ive said it before and nothing happened. at least after maybe a day. idk. i guess this is the point of the break. to figure out what i want in a relationship. and what i need for things to work.
Promise me that's all I want. Just a promise that you will never forget me. Tell me I changed you somehow. Let me know that I had an impact on your life. Promise me that you will always remember me. Losing you was hard enough, but I don't want to live knowing I meant absolutely nothing to you
Everything I am
And everything in me
Wants to be the one
You wanted me to be
I'll never let you down
Even if I could
I'd give up everything
If only for your good
So hold me when I'm here
Right me when I'm wrong
You can hold me when I'm scared
You won't always be there
So love me when I'm gone
allie.. i cant thank you enough... for understanding exactly what im going through. i love you-
alex.. im glad i surprise you. ;) thank you. for being there. i love you-
twin. yeah you know how cool you are. i love you-
well. okay. its 12:07. maybe i should get some sleep.
just kidding.
everything does happen for a reason. 'absence makes the heart grow fonder' we'll see about that one. obviously this cant go on forever. so maybe this is the point.. when i walk away.. and later ill find him again. maybe we arent to that point yet.
i deserve better than that. i deserve to be wanted. i want to be the one chased. not the one chasing. it always seems like i make the moves. and im sick of it.
ive finally made my decision. 2001 has been the best summer of my life so far. like yes. last summer was fun. i wont deny that having todd around was awesome. but the general atomosphere was so different. it was much more.. serious. hmpf. so me and lisa decided. we are going to control the bac. and this summer. and make it awesome. because its my last one.
Everyday I miss the you that I used to know.. before you let me down, before I let you go
okay. well i promise im done now. i really dont know what else to say. i want you to miss me. i want you to finally realize what you have taken for granted. and then show me that you have realized that.
thanks to everyone for being there. i love you guys so much <3
DUDE! THE OC TONITE WAS AWESOME! i cant wait til next week!
and on another random note- tomorrow is the last day before SPRING BREAK!!!
goodnight! :0)