This is what I'm about.
Two words that had an effect:
Distance.
(What distance?)
Perfect.
(Again, finally.)
In response to Leah,
I have to agree completely. Everyone has changed, and we imagine it to be for the worse for three reasons. Reason one being that the haze of nostalgia has fucked all of our memories. Reason two being that the haze of drugs has fucked all of our memories. And reason three being that we were all stoked off the serotonin and dopamine, but it wasn't real. We really don't all like each other as much as those chemicals led us to believe.
But in order to deal with the present, we have to realize that our concept of the past is not accurate. The past really was not that great, but believing the past to be great, fucks up our concept of the present.
I know I've changed and I know I've fucked up and I know I've made some terrible decisions and hurt people that I love with all my heart. But so has everyone else. We've all kicked people down, we've kicked our own friends down when they needed us most. I'm sick of people kicking other people down. I'm ready for some compassion.
I'm sorry for every time I hurt you, every time I neglected you, every time I started a fight over nothing. I'm sorry for not being honest, I'm sorry for not being faithful, I'm sorry for trying to hide my infidelity, I'm sorry for sneaking around. I'm sorry for not trusting you, and I'm sorry for treating you like you didn't love me. I'm sorry for abandoning you, I'm sorry for leaving you behind. I'm sorry for making you feel like complete shit every time you made a mistake. I'm sorry for lying.
When I say I'm sorry, it's not for everyone. It's for the people who really matter to me, the people who will matter to me in ten years, or twenty. I'm not saying sorry for forgiveness, I have already been forgiven. I'm saying sorry for the record, so we all know that part of my life is over. I'm done with negativity.
I remember when I always talked about my two best friends in the world, back in the day. And now I'm finally making everything right with both of them, and it feels amazing. I love you Leah, I love you Clinton.
Distance.
(What distance?)
Perfect.
(Again, finally.)
In response to Leah,
I have to agree completely. Everyone has changed, and we imagine it to be for the worse for three reasons. Reason one being that the haze of nostalgia has fucked all of our memories. Reason two being that the haze of drugs has fucked all of our memories. And reason three being that we were all stoked off the serotonin and dopamine, but it wasn't real. We really don't all like each other as much as those chemicals led us to believe.
But in order to deal with the present, we have to realize that our concept of the past is not accurate. The past really was not that great, but believing the past to be great, fucks up our concept of the present.
I know I've changed and I know I've fucked up and I know I've made some terrible decisions and hurt people that I love with all my heart. But so has everyone else. We've all kicked people down, we've kicked our own friends down when they needed us most. I'm sick of people kicking other people down. I'm ready for some compassion.
I'm sorry for every time I hurt you, every time I neglected you, every time I started a fight over nothing. I'm sorry for not being honest, I'm sorry for not being faithful, I'm sorry for trying to hide my infidelity, I'm sorry for sneaking around. I'm sorry for not trusting you, and I'm sorry for treating you like you didn't love me. I'm sorry for abandoning you, I'm sorry for leaving you behind. I'm sorry for making you feel like complete shit every time you made a mistake. I'm sorry for lying.
When I say I'm sorry, it's not for everyone. It's for the people who really matter to me, the people who will matter to me in ten years, or twenty. I'm not saying sorry for forgiveness, I have already been forgiven. I'm saying sorry for the record, so we all know that part of my life is over. I'm done with negativity.
I remember when I always talked about my two best friends in the world, back in the day. And now I'm finally making everything right with both of them, and it feels amazing. I love you Leah, I love you Clinton.