(no subject)
So I went to Rockford this weekend to visit the Master's Commission I'm going to in September, and I can't believe how beautiful my future looks. I don't think I have ever been surrounded by so many positive influences in my entire life as much as I was that whole weekend. In every person that I met I saw a glimpse of what I long to be every morning when I wake up. Confident, loving, accepting, faithful, beautiful from the inside out, bright, and a breath of fresh air. God has worked on each and every one of them so carefully it's phenomenal, and I can't wait for Him to work on me.
Those nine months are going to change me more than I can even imagine, and no one is going to be able to recognize me when I come back. I'm totally okay with that; I'm not happy with the person I am right now, and nothing here is going to benefit me as much as Rockford is. I need to keep my eyes on what's important and focus on keeping the most important people as close to me as I can. I'm done with the immature mind games and acceptance issues that I face every day, I'm not going to lose my focus on things that don't matter. I think too much, I always have. I just need to chill out and realize how pathetic I am sometimes.
I've learned more the past week than I have in a while. It's not my place to take care of anybody else but myself, and I need a lot of taking care of. I'm trying to have a more open mind and be as determined as I can to ready myself for how hard those nine months are going to be; but I'm ready for it. I've given myself completely to God, and nothing is as important to me as He is right now. In order for yourself to grow, something has to die. I died to myself, and I'm allowing Him to bring me back to life; to the woman I was made to be.
Those nine months are going to change me more than I can even imagine, and no one is going to be able to recognize me when I come back. I'm totally okay with that; I'm not happy with the person I am right now, and nothing here is going to benefit me as much as Rockford is. I need to keep my eyes on what's important and focus on keeping the most important people as close to me as I can. I'm done with the immature mind games and acceptance issues that I face every day, I'm not going to lose my focus on things that don't matter. I think too much, I always have. I just need to chill out and realize how pathetic I am sometimes.
I've learned more the past week than I have in a while. It's not my place to take care of anybody else but myself, and I need a lot of taking care of. I'm trying to have a more open mind and be as determined as I can to ready myself for how hard those nine months are going to be; but I'm ready for it. I've given myself completely to God, and nothing is as important to me as He is right now. In order for yourself to grow, something has to die. I died to myself, and I'm allowing Him to bring me back to life; to the woman I was made to be.