the move

[___downtown81]

once the ashes were scattered deep under the ground,
and the dust from the ancient doilies flew dizzily through the air;
my nervous spine would haphazardly twitch at every sound,
even when every part of me has accepted that you won't be there.

so i moved to a city of smog and my own blind hope,
laid the foundation down to build a life i can pretend to lead;
all the while, i'm still surmounting the need to cope,
and trying to re-access my aching want from my aching need.

{i miss you. i miss you. i miss you.}