Extremes. I'm going to die.

[___doll_]

analxcavity: i just don't know jenna
That was the beginning of it all.
Now, I'm crying, and I can't breathe.
Like Savanah says: I'm being too extreme.
But, I'm going to die. I AM. No one's telling me otherwise.
I'm going to fucking die.

Isaac is my world.
I love him so much.
I would be with him for the rest of my life it were possible right now.
I want to do everything I can to make shit right. But, I can't.
He wont' let me. He just won't fucking let me.

Yea, I hurt him.
He hurt me, too.

I'm trustworthy. I swear.
I'll do anything to prove it.

I keep listening to M.H.I.M. - Beautiful Mind
It makes me cry harder, because so many times,
I sat in Isaac's car, listening to it.
And watching him at the show,
so happy and satisfied with the moment,
it melted my heart.

I love that boy more than I could ever explain.
It's so real. So, good.

I'm starting to doubt everything he said to me.
Wifey, Steven Eli Hayden & Delilah Mae, bubble baths together, our cute hand holding, him wanting to make love to me, how beautiful he made me out to be, him walking around the apartment with me in my bra and on his shoulders.
Everything I once thought was so real, isn't so real;
misleading.

But, sometimes I doubt myself.

I don't think I'm cute enough,
or smart enough,
or skinny enough,
funny enough, or rich enough.
I just don't think I'm anything close to enough.

I'm displeasing, and unsatisfying.
I am too tall.
I get acne, bad.
My hair is too short.
I wear glasses.
I don't have a car or a job.
And, I'm a drop-out with a shitty family and very few good friends.

I'm just fucked.
So, extremely fucked.