like dead flowers..
Why is it that I have no luck at all? I find someone who is amazing in every which way, and that's just a let down.
I mean, not completely. I'm just tired of not doing anything anymore. We use to do so much...and be so happy. & now all it seems that we do it "argue." I know I'm not perfect. No one is. I'm just miserable. When I try to tell him how I feel, it turns into a screaming match. I can't take it anymore. I love him, I really truly do. He's funny, knows how to make me laugh, and I don't know what it is, but when he smiles, I can't help but smile. Maybe it's just me..maybe I'm the problem. Should I just walk away? Leave it all behind? I've thought about it. I doubt I can though without destroying myself. Am I over reacting? It's good to express your feelings, right? Obviously I have a lot of questions that won't be answered because this is pretty much me talking to myself here. I guess I'll just have to wait and see. "Only time will tell." It just so sucks. I feel sick to my stomach about this entire situation. I know half of it's my fault, I confess to that. It just can't be right when I express and show how much I care and love him and rarely ever get anything like that in return. Giving isn't always receiving...but it's not like giving him my love and care costs anything. There is only so much someone can build up inside before letting it all out..and it'll erupt at some point. Trust me, I just found out the hard way.
I mean, not completely. I'm just tired of not doing anything anymore. We use to do so much...and be so happy. & now all it seems that we do it "argue." I know I'm not perfect. No one is. I'm just miserable. When I try to tell him how I feel, it turns into a screaming match. I can't take it anymore. I love him, I really truly do. He's funny, knows how to make me laugh, and I don't know what it is, but when he smiles, I can't help but smile. Maybe it's just me..maybe I'm the problem. Should I just walk away? Leave it all behind? I've thought about it. I doubt I can though without destroying myself. Am I over reacting? It's good to express your feelings, right? Obviously I have a lot of questions that won't be answered because this is pretty much me talking to myself here. I guess I'll just have to wait and see. "Only time will tell." It just so sucks. I feel sick to my stomach about this entire situation. I know half of it's my fault, I confess to that. It just can't be right when I express and show how much I care and love him and rarely ever get anything like that in return. Giving isn't always receiving...but it's not like giving him my love and care costs anything. There is only so much someone can build up inside before letting it all out..and it'll erupt at some point. Trust me, I just found out the hard way.