(no subject)
i'm so tired. so so so tired. i have to work really, really hard. i wish i didn't fuck up. i wish my mom was home. the feeling i get when i come home just makes me feel like shit.
whenever i walk in late at night, when it's dark and no one is home, i just want so bad to sit and cry. the last time my mom was home was a long time ago. there's no food, nothing. it's so hard to have to wake myself up in the morning for school when there's no one there to make sure you get up. all the things i took for granted when i was younger - having your mom say goodnight, having her tell you to have a good day, asking you how school was. i wish i still had those things. i wish i could come home to my mom yelling at me about how i was late, but i don't get that, and i wish i did.
i have to beg her to stay home some nights, and even then, she leaves, and i won't see her for another two weeks. her visits are quick, and there's few of them.
i hate this empty apartment.
whenever i walk in late at night, when it's dark and no one is home, i just want so bad to sit and cry. the last time my mom was home was a long time ago. there's no food, nothing. it's so hard to have to wake myself up in the morning for school when there's no one there to make sure you get up. all the things i took for granted when i was younger - having your mom say goodnight, having her tell you to have a good day, asking you how school was. i wish i still had those things. i wish i could come home to my mom yelling at me about how i was late, but i don't get that, and i wish i did.
i have to beg her to stay home some nights, and even then, she leaves, and i won't see her for another two weeks. her visits are quick, and there's few of them.
i hate this empty apartment.