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I just got done venting in my other journal [xanga] and thought I should put it in here, in case that one of whom i was referring to just so conveniently happens to come across this &read it... enjoy.
last night was a long night; mom had friends over &stuff, and we all drank &i got pretty drunk. it was fun. layed out in the sun for a while &got a tiny bit of color that went away by this morning. talked to pete for about an hour &a half last night, then watched "road trip" & "not another teen movie." good stuff, crawled into bed, just to wake up at the ass-crack of dawn this morning to babysit. 11-5. the kids were awesome, we watched movies &played outside most of the time, and hey, i got 60 bucks. so it's all good. i wanna go shopping... i'm probably hangingout with ashley pretty soon, we haven't hungout in a while &her boyfriend is moving here soon. i better get to her before he does! haha.
so yeah, i got the job at roadhouse. i've needed a job for a while now and i wanted to work there because i hear it's fun &it pays good. steph also said she wants to work with me, so i finally applied &got the job. i have orientation tomorrow after school &hopefully i'll start the training on tuesday. pretty nervous, but the people i know that work there say i have nothing to worry about. :]
i can't wait for the summer; it's gonna be so amazing. back to palmcoast to spend the summer with my bestfriends &the love of my life. beach, parties, bonfires. fucking insanity. i'm so stoked. i miss peter so much man, it's been like 2 weeks already and the night i got home i cried myself to sleep; it's pretty much been the same way every single night for the past couple weeks. it sucks being so in love with someone and knowing you can't be with them all the time - but i have to admit, the times we are together are the best i've ever had and wouldn't trade them for the world. he's such a great person and he's so amazing, i love everything about him. he makes me so happy. it's so sad that people really think they could take him from me. we're in love, and we're not breakingup anytime soon, and i'm sorry you're so unhappy with yourselves that you need to "blackmail" me and put threats &restrictions on my life &relationship to make yourself feel more superior. you seriously suck at life &you should go die. :] kthnx.
i'm taking courses at CTC next year to get my creds up, and it's a simple test to take in order to qualify. i've been studying &getting myself together. i've been focusing so much on myself &studies, and my OWN life lately to realize what's been goingon around me. not that i really care; because i pay complete attention to the people i do care about. the rest of you can fuck yourselves for all i care, you're not ruining anything for me.
another thing [yes this is it for this update]; i'm seriously getting fed up with the immature shit from all of you who have nothing else to do rather than harrass me. it's pretty sickening to my gut. you disgust me. you think that i'm just always going to take it &take it &take it forever, but in reality, think about it. the people you fuck with, snap. don't be surprised if one of these days i just fucking explode. i'm such a nice person and deserve nothing but happiness, and well, for you, i can't really say the same. you don't know half of the shit that i've been through and that i go through NOW, and you'll never know. you just need to leave me alone and stay the fuck out of my life. this goes for all of you who can't take a fucking hint that you're being ignored &your words mean nothing to me. of course, i read your pathetic, petty comments, but that doesn't mean they really affect me. it's just getting exhausting to have to come to my journal every day to see another one of your swift-written little comments TELLING me what i should &should not do, and how I should and should not be. you didn't give birth to me, therefore, stay the fuck out of my business. I could care less what you think about me. your opinions are useless to me &i refuse to change for anyone but myself. there is nothing wrong with me or what i do; you should be questioning "what's really wrong with me?" then maybe you'll come up with an adequate answer to all of your fucking problems in life &then MAYBE you'll leave me the fuck alone, because you're really gay &annoying. go ahead, comment on this &tell me what you think, but keep in mind, they'll only be deleted - and don't flatter yourself. it's not because i'm AFRAID of you [considering I really have nothing to be afraid of], it's just that what you say means nothing at all to me &they're so ridiculous that they don't deserve to be in my journal.
peter's birthday is in 12 days; i don't know what to get him. any ideas? comment.
k, i'm done with this entry [as i promised] &i know it was extremely long but I had to get some things off my chest, and YEAH. IT'S MY JOURNAL &I CAN BABBLE ALL I WANT. haha. so i'm gonna go and take a shower &clean up for bed. i need to get some sleep &re-cooperate from the previous weekend. awh, &tomorrow i'm hangingout with my sandra at lunch. :] she's so awesome.
night.
"How does it feel to be on the receiving end of this one?"
I just got done venting in my other journal [xanga] and thought I should put it in here, in case that one of whom i was referring to just so conveniently happens to come across this &read it... enjoy.
last night was a long night; mom had friends over &stuff, and we all drank &i got pretty drunk. it was fun. layed out in the sun for a while &got a tiny bit of color that went away by this morning. talked to pete for about an hour &a half last night, then watched "road trip" & "not another teen movie." good stuff, crawled into bed, just to wake up at the ass-crack of dawn this morning to babysit. 11-5. the kids were awesome, we watched movies &played outside most of the time, and hey, i got 60 bucks. so it's all good. i wanna go shopping... i'm probably hangingout with ashley pretty soon, we haven't hungout in a while &her boyfriend is moving here soon. i better get to her before he does! haha.
so yeah, i got the job at roadhouse. i've needed a job for a while now and i wanted to work there because i hear it's fun &it pays good. steph also said she wants to work with me, so i finally applied &got the job. i have orientation tomorrow after school &hopefully i'll start the training on tuesday. pretty nervous, but the people i know that work there say i have nothing to worry about. :]
i can't wait for the summer; it's gonna be so amazing. back to palmcoast to spend the summer with my bestfriends &the love of my life. beach, parties, bonfires. fucking insanity. i'm so stoked. i miss peter so much man, it's been like 2 weeks already and the night i got home i cried myself to sleep; it's pretty much been the same way every single night for the past couple weeks. it sucks being so in love with someone and knowing you can't be with them all the time - but i have to admit, the times we are together are the best i've ever had and wouldn't trade them for the world. he's such a great person and he's so amazing, i love everything about him. he makes me so happy. it's so sad that people really think they could take him from me. we're in love, and we're not breakingup anytime soon, and i'm sorry you're so unhappy with yourselves that you need to "blackmail" me and put threats &restrictions on my life &relationship to make yourself feel more superior. you seriously suck at life &you should go die. :] kthnx.
i'm taking courses at CTC next year to get my creds up, and it's a simple test to take in order to qualify. i've been studying &getting myself together. i've been focusing so much on myself &studies, and my OWN life lately to realize what's been goingon around me. not that i really care; because i pay complete attention to the people i do care about. the rest of you can fuck yourselves for all i care, you're not ruining anything for me.
another thing [yes this is it for this update]; i'm seriously getting fed up with the immature shit from all of you who have nothing else to do rather than harrass me. it's pretty sickening to my gut. you disgust me. you think that i'm just always going to take it &take it &take it forever, but in reality, think about it. the people you fuck with, snap. don't be surprised if one of these days i just fucking explode. i'm such a nice person and deserve nothing but happiness, and well, for you, i can't really say the same. you don't know half of the shit that i've been through and that i go through NOW, and you'll never know. you just need to leave me alone and stay the fuck out of my life. this goes for all of you who can't take a fucking hint that you're being ignored &your words mean nothing to me. of course, i read your pathetic, petty comments, but that doesn't mean they really affect me. it's just getting exhausting to have to come to my journal every day to see another one of your swift-written little comments TELLING me what i should &should not do, and how I should and should not be. you didn't give birth to me, therefore, stay the fuck out of my business. I could care less what you think about me. your opinions are useless to me &i refuse to change for anyone but myself. there is nothing wrong with me or what i do; you should be questioning "what's really wrong with me?" then maybe you'll come up with an adequate answer to all of your fucking problems in life &then MAYBE you'll leave me the fuck alone, because you're really gay &annoying. go ahead, comment on this &tell me what you think, but keep in mind, they'll only be deleted - and don't flatter yourself. it's not because i'm AFRAID of you [considering I really have nothing to be afraid of], it's just that what you say means nothing at all to me &they're so ridiculous that they don't deserve to be in my journal.
peter's birthday is in 12 days; i don't know what to get him. any ideas? comment.
k, i'm done with this entry [as i promised] &i know it was extremely long but I had to get some things off my chest, and YEAH. IT'S MY JOURNAL &I CAN BABBLE ALL I WANT. haha. so i'm gonna go and take a shower &clean up for bed. i need to get some sleep &re-cooperate from the previous weekend. awh, &tomorrow i'm hangingout with my sandra at lunch. :] she's so awesome.
night.
"How does it feel to be on the receiving end of this one?"