(no subject)
i work at pleasing me cuz i cant please you.
and that's why i do what i do.
i am curious.
i am exploring.
i am learning.
i am more on my own than i've ever been. so many strange things are coming at me all at one time. nothing serious or legal. i dont feel like the new year as some huge deal but it's shaping up to be the way this month's going so far. i'm writing a lot. and reading. it's really nice. i do have a sudden urge to be more social. i worked very hard last year and achieved a lot of goals and i need to fall back into the social ring and let work be work and not my life. maybe it's just turning 21. you were young and a teenager and you were expressing yourself to the fullest then you turn 18 and start doing things more on your own and more people have more expectations of you and responsibilities. so you get all that shit figured out and you're like hey were did my fun life go? where did my adventure go? when did it turn into discretion and censorship? very strange.
so now im at the wtf where is my life. but it's fun. its a slow long process getting back to a balance between work and play and evaluating what you really want for yourself rather than what other people want from you. and other people could be anyone; your family, your boss, your coworkers, your landlord, your bill collectors.
so this year i'm going to take more time and NOT go to bed at 8 oclock just because i have to wake up early in the morning. i'm going to have fun, im going to do what i want to do and continue to stay focused and excel at work. i'm a big girl and i can have my cake and eat it too.
dammit.
and that's why i do what i do.
i am curious.
i am exploring.
i am learning.
i am more on my own than i've ever been. so many strange things are coming at me all at one time. nothing serious or legal. i dont feel like the new year as some huge deal but it's shaping up to be the way this month's going so far. i'm writing a lot. and reading. it's really nice. i do have a sudden urge to be more social. i worked very hard last year and achieved a lot of goals and i need to fall back into the social ring and let work be work and not my life. maybe it's just turning 21. you were young and a teenager and you were expressing yourself to the fullest then you turn 18 and start doing things more on your own and more people have more expectations of you and responsibilities. so you get all that shit figured out and you're like hey were did my fun life go? where did my adventure go? when did it turn into discretion and censorship? very strange.
so now im at the wtf where is my life. but it's fun. its a slow long process getting back to a balance between work and play and evaluating what you really want for yourself rather than what other people want from you. and other people could be anyone; your family, your boss, your coworkers, your landlord, your bill collectors.
so this year i'm going to take more time and NOT go to bed at 8 oclock just because i have to wake up early in the morning. i'm going to have fun, im going to do what i want to do and continue to stay focused and excel at work. i'm a big girl and i can have my cake and eat it too.
dammit.