(no subject)
Today has been okay. Jen and I talked and Bobbie and I talked. Bobbie apologized for crying on the fone to me and I told her it was okay. It showed me she cared that I left her. I miss her a lot..
Jen keeps telling me she loves me and misses me. I know she does, but I don't want to be with her.. Yeah sometimes I do, and I regret leaving her because I miss something about us. But not a lot..
I'm not mad at Bobbie for cheating. If I was her.. I'd probably do it too. Thing is.. I'm not mad at her. Yeah I was hurt, but the pain subsidded, and I just can't stay mad at her. I love her with everything I am. I do trust her.. which scares me. I mean.. I believe her, and she hurt me. And I don't know what's going on. I hear her voice, think about her, and see her face none stop throughout my mind.
I was thinking about her at work, and I was tryna make myself mad at her, but I can't. I'm not mad at her. Is this real love? I hope so.. because I'm tired of searching.. I'm not getting with her right away. She's got a long time to prove to me she wouldnt do anything to ruin us again.. and I don't want to rush anything.
Gah.. I was daydreaming about her and I being together.. and talking about having kids, and I was juss sitting there so sad.. because then I thought about her with someone else.. and I just felt depressed.. :(. I love her so much.. I really do. I love everything about her.. I love how she cares about her friends and enjoys hanging with them. I love her voice and her personality. I love the way she talks to me on the fone. The way she gets mad when I call her cute. How evil she can get when she gets me back for picking on her. I love who she is.. How she stopped drinking for me..
She just better not hurt me again.. or I swear I'll end my life.. I wouldn't be able to take it =\. But yeah.. I love Her..
Work was good.. I'm so tired though. I'm going to go lay down. <3.
Jen keeps telling me she loves me and misses me. I know she does, but I don't want to be with her.. Yeah sometimes I do, and I regret leaving her because I miss something about us. But not a lot..
I'm not mad at Bobbie for cheating. If I was her.. I'd probably do it too. Thing is.. I'm not mad at her. Yeah I was hurt, but the pain subsidded, and I just can't stay mad at her. I love her with everything I am. I do trust her.. which scares me. I mean.. I believe her, and she hurt me. And I don't know what's going on. I hear her voice, think about her, and see her face none stop throughout my mind.
I was thinking about her at work, and I was tryna make myself mad at her, but I can't. I'm not mad at her. Is this real love? I hope so.. because I'm tired of searching.. I'm not getting with her right away. She's got a long time to prove to me she wouldnt do anything to ruin us again.. and I don't want to rush anything.
Gah.. I was daydreaming about her and I being together.. and talking about having kids, and I was juss sitting there so sad.. because then I thought about her with someone else.. and I just felt depressed.. :(. I love her so much.. I really do. I love everything about her.. I love how she cares about her friends and enjoys hanging with them. I love her voice and her personality. I love the way she talks to me on the fone. The way she gets mad when I call her cute. How evil she can get when she gets me back for picking on her. I love who she is.. How she stopped drinking for me..
She just better not hurt me again.. or I swear I'll end my life.. I wouldn't be able to take it =\. But yeah.. I love Her..
Work was good.. I'm so tired though. I'm going to go lay down. <3.