I found 99% of this to be true...
Part 1 - Jeff Foxworthy's view of Michigan:
If you consider it a sport to gather your food by drilling through
18 inches of ice and sitting there all day hoping that the food will swim by,
you might live in Michigan.
If you're proud that your region makes the national news 96 nights each year
because Pellston is the coldest spot in the nation, you might live
in Michigan.
If your local Dairy Queen is closed from November through March, you
might live in Michigan.
If you instinctively walk like a penguin
for five months out of the year,
you might live in Michigan.
If someone in a store offers you
assistance, and they don't work
there,
you might live in Michigan.
If your dad's suntan stops at a
line curving around the middle of
his forehead,
you might live in Michigan.
If you have worn shorts and a coat
at the same time, you might live
in Michigan.
If your town has an equal number of
bars and churches, you might
live in Michigan.
If you have had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who
dialed a wrong number,
you might live in Michigan.
Part 2 - You know you're a true MICHIGANIAN when.............
1. "Vacation" means going up north on I-75.
2. You measure distance in hours.
3. You know several people who have hit a deer more than once.
4. You often switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day.
5. You can drive 65 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard, without flinching.
6. You see people wearing camouflage at social events (including weddings).
7. You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both unlocked.
8. You carry jumper cables in your car and your girlfriend knows how to use them.
9. You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.
10. Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow.
11. You know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter and road construction.
12. You can identify a southern or eastern accent.
13. Your idea of creative landscaping is a statue of a deer next to your blue spruce.
14. You were unaware that there is a legal drinking age.
15. Down South to you means Ohio
16. A brat is something you eat.
17. Your neighbor throws a party to celebrate his new pole barn.
18. You go out to fish fry every Friday.
19. Your 4th of July picnic was moved indoors due to frost.
20. You have more miles on your snow blower than your car.
21. You find 0 degrees "a little chilly."
22. You drink pop and bake with soda.
23. Your doctor tells you to drink Vernors and you know it's not medicine.
24. You know what a Yooper is.
25. You think owning a Honda is Un American.
26. You know that UP is a place, not a direction
27. You know it's possible to live in a thumb.
28. You understand that when visiting
Detroit, the best thing to
wear is a Kevlar vest.
If you consider it a sport to gather your food by drilling through
18 inches of ice and sitting there all day hoping that the food will swim by,
you might live in Michigan.
If you're proud that your region makes the national news 96 nights each year
because Pellston is the coldest spot in the nation, you might live
in Michigan.
If your local Dairy Queen is closed from November through March, you
might live in Michigan.
If you instinctively walk like a penguin
for five months out of the year,
you might live in Michigan.
If someone in a store offers you
assistance, and they don't work
there,
you might live in Michigan.
If your dad's suntan stops at a
line curving around the middle of
his forehead,
you might live in Michigan.
If you have worn shorts and a coat
at the same time, you might live
in Michigan.
If your town has an equal number of
bars and churches, you might
live in Michigan.
If you have had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who
dialed a wrong number,
you might live in Michigan.
Part 2 - You know you're a true MICHIGANIAN when.............
1. "Vacation" means going up north on I-75.
2. You measure distance in hours.
3. You know several people who have hit a deer more than once.
4. You often switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day.
5. You can drive 65 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard, without flinching.
6. You see people wearing camouflage at social events (including weddings).
7. You install security lights on your house and garage and leave both unlocked.
8. You carry jumper cables in your car and your girlfriend knows how to use them.
9. You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a snowsuit.
10. Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow.
11. You know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter and road construction.
12. You can identify a southern or eastern accent.
13. Your idea of creative landscaping is a statue of a deer next to your blue spruce.
14. You were unaware that there is a legal drinking age.
15. Down South to you means Ohio
16. A brat is something you eat.
17. Your neighbor throws a party to celebrate his new pole barn.
18. You go out to fish fry every Friday.
19. Your 4th of July picnic was moved indoors due to frost.
20. You have more miles on your snow blower than your car.
21. You find 0 degrees "a little chilly."
22. You drink pop and bake with soda.
23. Your doctor tells you to drink Vernors and you know it's not medicine.
24. You know what a Yooper is.
25. You think owning a Honda is Un American.
26. You know that UP is a place, not a direction
27. You know it's possible to live in a thumb.
28. You understand that when visiting
Detroit, the best thing to
wear is a Kevlar vest.