i was the one worth leaving.

[_4_letter_lie_]

i really dont know what to think anymore.
There's one part I hate, though. Often, when I take a turn too fast or too sharp, or just when I lose control, I fall. The worst part is right before the fall when I can feel everything coming apart and I know exactly what's going to happen - and I can't do anything to stop it.

I give up.
I won't even bother addressing that "you" anymore...
I have this problem you see...and I'm really in trouble...cause I'm not sure what I'm going to do...or...where to go...
But I don't need anyone's help. I got myself into this mess, and I will find a way out of it.
I'm not the only woman who's had a hard time of it...I mean - things could be alot worse...
and...
I don't need anyone to love me. I'll take care of myself.
so...
Hurray for pride.

truthfully if i had a chance to try this all again, i'de say yes.
truthfully i won't end this pain because i have some weird sense that things will work out.
why am i hopeless?

pondering this concept
nobobody read this anyways.
i might delete you all and make it private.
just a thought.