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Feb 18, 2005 13:56

Neurotically Yours: Episode # 065: So I Said to My Doctor

Pilz-E: So, I’m talking to my doctor about my ‘jit’ nervous, I’m nervous. And he says, he says, “I know what the problem might be. You drink so much coffee. It’s making you a little jittery.” And I said, “What?!” He said, “Coffee.” And I said, “Yes, thank you I would love some.” So he said, “No. Just that could be the problem.”

And what’s so ironic about this whole thing is, we were talking about my nervousness due to coffee, over coffee. So I think he’s just trying to hook me, and put me in this vicious cycle of disgusting my dependence of coffee over coffee thus, reinforcing the dependence and reinforcing his dependence on my money.

So I said, “Maybe we shouldn’t meet in Joe’s coffee shop anymore, and we should you know go to your office or something. And he says, “Well, that would be fine.” And and I said, “Well, do you have any coffee there?” And he says, “No, I don’t have any coffee there.” So I said, “Well, well with all the money I give you, you, you figure you could add a little cup of sanka in there even. You know patient comes in, you give him some decaf at least.

Germaine: Aw, come on. Where’s the fuckin’ waitress?

Pilz-E: You can’t just go throughout the day without the coffee!

Germaine: I’ve been sitting here for 20 minutes waiting for a refill of coffee.

Pilz-E: Oh. ‘jch’ Thank you. I would love some.

Germaine: Damnit!

Pilz-E: My God! The cup is empty! Now, mother fuck is the crazy non here! It’s empty! Like a head on a shelf of a dead man’s office.

Copyright: Jonathan Ian Mathers: 2005.
www.illwillpress.com
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