#Fic# Why eggplants?
Title: Why eggplants?
Pairing: Akame
Rating: PG
Genre: crack, humor
Warning: no beta
Summary: Jin is getting presents from fans and one thing is common in all of them.
AN: After Blackheat told me Jin got these presents really I couldn't stop myself to write a fic about it.
The manager said nothing at all. Not even a single thing as he threw yet another huge box of letters next to the other twenty in front of the one named Akanishi Jin. The singer was just watching the action blinking and in disbelief then rather expressionless as he saw yet again... those were from fans and the most horrible thing, each of them were decorated with eggplant pictures.
For two days this kept going on like that, never in his life did he get so many letters from so many different countries. He usually - as all of them in JE - didn't care much about fanletters, never answering them and rarely even bothering to read, he has work to do, he has no time for stuff like that.
He was already almost buried with papers, letters and there was not a single inch in KAT-TUN dressing room which didn't have something eggpalnt decorated because the presents he got were all over the room. He swore he won't throw any of it away as long as he won't solve the mystery: Why eggplants??
He spent most of his time thinking about it, and when he was bored of building postcard castles of the received bunch, seeing it won't give him any salvation from the pain of the matter being unsolved, he was just staring at them messed up all over the table.
Taguchi, Ueda, Koki and Kame all had different expressions painted on their faces. Ueda had one that screamed 'no comment', Koki was grinning dirtyly and tried not to laugh out loud. Kame was just shaking his head with narrowed eyes, hands on his hips. All of them understood it, expect Taguchi who was as usual. A wide smile which showed he was as clueless why his bandmate was getting these stuff as Akanishi himself.
'Hmmm... let's see... Eggplant... Hmm... Maybe they want me to eat healtyly since eggplant is a vegetable. Or.... it is purple as Murasaki my song, so they want me to sing Murasaki on the concert while being healthy...' He was thinking hard.
"Uh... sorry for being late." Nakamaru stepped in and with that same movement accidentally kicked away a plush eggplant. Jin tossed the mountain of eggplant keyholders away, postcards and drawings from the table to be able to see Maru and with the most serious expression he started to talk finally after just staring at the things for half an hour.
"I just wonder...why eggplants??"
Kame gaped and Koki burst out laughing. This was what he was thinking about? All of them thought Jin already knew. Ueda turned away and Nakamaru sweatdropped. Just Junno nodded with a thoughtful face.
"You really don't know?!?" The youngest member of the group asked in disbelief, widening his eyes. Wasn't it obvious enough?
"I just hope you use YOUR eggplant more times than your brain." The rapper teased feeling totally amused. Jin just blinked innocently, not getting the meaning and looked around. "All of them?? But I have so much, just look. And what can I use it to? I can't eat it and ... I was thinking to give the plush to Nakamaru which he already kicked."
Koki was holding his tummy from laughing. "Nakamaru kicked YOUR eggplant? You want to give it to him??? Poor Kame-chan!" It was really just too entertaining. Times like this he thanked fate he was in KAT-TUN because being with Akanishi sometimes was more funny than watching 10 comedies in a row. He even didn't stop laughing when Kame hit the back of his head hard.
Kazuya was a little blushed, but not feeling embarrassed, rather he couldnt believe this was happening.
"Kazu? What does my eggpant do with Kazu?" Jin blinked more now.
"Oh God! Nothing?? Then sorry we misunderstood your moans all the time." This caused the Joker even harder slap from the K of the band to his head.
Seeing how much darkness his boyfriend is in, Kame tried to explain the situation.
"Khmm.. Jin, they mean YOUR eggplant... down there. You see?"
The not very clever expression showed the younger that the meaning still didn't sink into Akanishi's brain.
"You mean my eggplant patterned new sock?"
Koki was already on the floor rolling laughing, earning a death glare from Kame.
"Then I help too." He said ignoring Kazuya's warning look 'dontyoudareto'. "It is what Kame-chan is always eating, he is very healthy already I am sure."
"Koooki!!" was heard from a furious turtle and the rapper popped up of the ground, running for his life, being chased around the table.
"I feel I am in the kindergarten..." Ueda sighed then he decided to break the wall of total darkness in his bandmate. "They mean your COCK."
After a deep silence from Jin he exclaimed. "Whaaat???" It finally reached his braincells and he stood up, pouting. "But my cock is not purple and that shaped! Right Kazu? Tell them!" He whined and Kame stopped dead in his track, looking at him as furiously as at Koki.
"Decided. I will kill you both."
****
END
Pairing: Akame
Rating: PG
Genre: crack, humor
Warning: no beta
Summary: Jin is getting presents from fans and one thing is common in all of them.
AN: After Blackheat told me Jin got these presents really I couldn't stop myself to write a fic about it.
The manager said nothing at all. Not even a single thing as he threw yet another huge box of letters next to the other twenty in front of the one named Akanishi Jin. The singer was just watching the action blinking and in disbelief then rather expressionless as he saw yet again... those were from fans and the most horrible thing, each of them were decorated with eggplant pictures.
For two days this kept going on like that, never in his life did he get so many letters from so many different countries. He usually - as all of them in JE - didn't care much about fanletters, never answering them and rarely even bothering to read, he has work to do, he has no time for stuff like that.
He was already almost buried with papers, letters and there was not a single inch in KAT-TUN dressing room which didn't have something eggpalnt decorated because the presents he got were all over the room. He swore he won't throw any of it away as long as he won't solve the mystery: Why eggplants??
He spent most of his time thinking about it, and when he was bored of building postcard castles of the received bunch, seeing it won't give him any salvation from the pain of the matter being unsolved, he was just staring at them messed up all over the table.
Taguchi, Ueda, Koki and Kame all had different expressions painted on their faces. Ueda had one that screamed 'no comment', Koki was grinning dirtyly and tried not to laugh out loud. Kame was just shaking his head with narrowed eyes, hands on his hips. All of them understood it, expect Taguchi who was as usual. A wide smile which showed he was as clueless why his bandmate was getting these stuff as Akanishi himself.
'Hmmm... let's see... Eggplant... Hmm... Maybe they want me to eat healtyly since eggplant is a vegetable. Or.... it is purple as Murasaki my song, so they want me to sing Murasaki on the concert while being healthy...' He was thinking hard.
"Uh... sorry for being late." Nakamaru stepped in and with that same movement accidentally kicked away a plush eggplant. Jin tossed the mountain of eggplant keyholders away, postcards and drawings from the table to be able to see Maru and with the most serious expression he started to talk finally after just staring at the things for half an hour.
"I just wonder...why eggplants??"
Kame gaped and Koki burst out laughing. This was what he was thinking about? All of them thought Jin already knew. Ueda turned away and Nakamaru sweatdropped. Just Junno nodded with a thoughtful face.
"You really don't know?!?" The youngest member of the group asked in disbelief, widening his eyes. Wasn't it obvious enough?
"I just hope you use YOUR eggplant more times than your brain." The rapper teased feeling totally amused. Jin just blinked innocently, not getting the meaning and looked around. "All of them?? But I have so much, just look. And what can I use it to? I can't eat it and ... I was thinking to give the plush to Nakamaru which he already kicked."
Koki was holding his tummy from laughing. "Nakamaru kicked YOUR eggplant? You want to give it to him??? Poor Kame-chan!" It was really just too entertaining. Times like this he thanked fate he was in KAT-TUN because being with Akanishi sometimes was more funny than watching 10 comedies in a row. He even didn't stop laughing when Kame hit the back of his head hard.
Kazuya was a little blushed, but not feeling embarrassed, rather he couldnt believe this was happening.
"Kazu? What does my eggpant do with Kazu?" Jin blinked more now.
"Oh God! Nothing?? Then sorry we misunderstood your moans all the time." This caused the Joker even harder slap from the K of the band to his head.
Seeing how much darkness his boyfriend is in, Kame tried to explain the situation.
"Khmm.. Jin, they mean YOUR eggplant... down there. You see?"
The not very clever expression showed the younger that the meaning still didn't sink into Akanishi's brain.
"You mean my eggplant patterned new sock?"
Koki was already on the floor rolling laughing, earning a death glare from Kame.
"Then I help too." He said ignoring Kazuya's warning look 'dontyoudareto'. "It is what Kame-chan is always eating, he is very healthy already I am sure."
"Koooki!!" was heard from a furious turtle and the rapper popped up of the ground, running for his life, being chased around the table.
"I feel I am in the kindergarten..." Ueda sighed then he decided to break the wall of total darkness in his bandmate. "They mean your COCK."
After a deep silence from Jin he exclaimed. "Whaaat???" It finally reached his braincells and he stood up, pouting. "But my cock is not purple and that shaped! Right Kazu? Tell them!" He whined and Kame stopped dead in his track, looking at him as furiously as at Koki.
"Decided. I will kill you both."
****
END