What. The. Hell.
Okay. I'm relieved and pissed off.
I'm 205% positive I have the learning disability "Dyscalculia." Don't know what Dyscalculia is? Of course. Nobody does.
I didn't know. My teachers didn't know. The phychiatrists didn't know. I was just diagnosed with ADD. Yeah, I have ADD. But I KNEW it was something else. My parents knew. I didn't know how to explain it. It's all about math, of course.
It was never that I was "just bad at math." Lots of people are bad at math. But its different. I see numbers backwards, upside down. I couldn't tell time on a clock until I was 16.
I just researched it and it all makes sense. I have every fucking symptom.
People with Dyscalculia:
1. Have poor athletic coordination. That's me!
2. Have trouble with formal music education. That's me! That explains why I was never able to read music and count.
3. Have trouble learning dance steps and sequences. Hellooo me.
4. Horrible drivers. Have poor sense of direction and perception.
5. Difficulty keeping score in games. Bad at strategic games like chess. Seems absent minded.
6. Lacks "big picture" thinking.
7. Unable to comprehend mechanical processes.
Yes, thats me all of those. The problem is that it affects everything in my life and all these years I just felt stupid. Nobody told me about it or believed me. I go to special services in college and they ask "do you have dyslexia?" No. Everyone knows about that learning disability. But nobody knows about mine so nobody knows how to help me. If more people knew about it..wow..school might have been a lot easier. So yeah, i'm kind of pissed.
You'd think that I could escape math in art school. HA! I have to do all this measuring. I can't use a ruler. I can't measure. There are too many numbers and I just don't get it.
I'm so sick of every teacher getting fed up with me and saying "why don't you get it?" No teacher would yell at a dyslexic person because they have trouble reading. GAHH. What the hell.