Anger and hubris run amok
The following is a small rant session. Please excuse the cynical tone, the lack of eloquent presentation, and the occasional USE OF CAPS.
What a day. Here are a few highlights to give you a more complete picture.
No, Curt, I did not stop by Berkeley's and pick you up taffy, nor did I stop at Sapienza's for cookies on my recent journey to BURY MY GRANDFATHER. What is most troubling about this is you were in NJ visiting your father at the time of the funeral yet couldn't be bothered to attend. Why couldn't you stop by Berk's and get the damn taffy yourself? Granted I was on Long Island and therefore could have stopped in to get some Sappy's or even some Martino's but you will forgive me if I had other things on my mind. So next time you think you'll drop me an email, you inconsiderate prick, don't.
Dear Dr. Plagiarist: No, you can not use something I wrote and turned in to you in your class two years ago as your own work in a refereed journal. Especially since I had tried to publish it in the same journal within this calendar year. Oh wait, you didn't ask in the first place... How'd I find out, you ask? The editor called me about an hour ago and asked if I was copying my professor's work. I haven't figured out what to do about you yet, but I'm going to ask around and take appropriate action. I'll be damned if you try and cut my funding last year and then try to steal my work. You haven't been at this university long enough to have that much clout.
And finally, to my fellow travailleux, I may have cancer, but I am not going to die right now, and therefore can do things like water sampling and other elementary field tasks with both no accommodation AND my eyes duct-taped shut. I am sick, not bedridden, and despite my constant headache and near-constant nausea, my alternating cycles of water retention and loss, the occasional vision-too-blurry-to-function day, and all my other vicious cycles, I can still earn my keep.
I'm going to go call someone. I am going to go call her. She will know what to do.