Miracle
Title: Miracle
Author: althea / 79_percent
Rating: PG-13
Form: One-shot, Songfic
Fandom: H.O.T
Pairing: JunTa
Genre: Mild Angst
Lyrics: B*Witched - I Shall Be There
Summary: They never met before, and yet they knew they're meant for each other.
A HOT -Birthday Dedication- Fiction
"Miracle"
Part 1/1
~*~
[Awaken, breathe;
Hear the calling in the wind..]
"Mr. Moon."
HeeJun pressed a specific, grey button on his telephone while his other hand kept typing furiously on his keyboard.
"Yes, Rina?" He addressed his secretary over the intra-company telephone network. He gave a sharp frown to himself when his screen displayed the words in bold red, indicating that his attempt to access his personal account had been denied. Strange, he mused. He had never made any wrong input before, especially when it concerned his password.
"Mr. Lee is on the third line," the sweet voice informed him politely.
"Which Mr. Lee?" He did not recall any Lees in any of his latest transactions. Even if at the very least he had ten cases on his hands there and then, he could be sure none of them bore the surname Lee. He typed a few more commands before pressing the 'enter' button. When the window started to load, he gave a satisfactory smile and leaned well back onto his cushioned chair.
"It's Lee JaeWon-sshi, the future heir of the Exodus Hotel."
HeeJun chuckled at the mention of his cousin being called the 'heir' to his father's vast enterprise. He knew well that his cousin was reluctant to serve in the hospitality industry in which the family had been running on for generations. He would rather pursue his career in arts. And perhaps, to escape the rigid hold of the world and fly to somewhere peaceful with a particular sweet someone.
"Mr. Moon? Sir? Are you still there?" HeeJun heard the worried tone in his employee's voice.
"Ah, yes, I'm sorry. Could you transfer him to my private line, please, Rina. Thank you very much."
"You're welcome, Sir."
Hearing the soft buzzing sound of his other telephone by the window, HeeJun sighed, suddenly feeling a growing headache at the back of his skull. He picked the receiver up and promised his exhausted mind for a painkiller later.
"Yoboseyo?"
[The voice, it's saying
That a journey must begin..]
"Yoboseyo?"
["KangTa! Stop avoiding my calls!!"]
The young CEO immediately put his handphone further away from his ear as the person across the line hollered, almost effectively deafening his ear. He winced when the shouts resumed for a little more than two minutes. When he heard the audible breathing as the other person stopped screaming, he timidly placed his phone back to his ear and asked, "You done?"
["NO!"]
"Wait, wait!! WooHyuk, I weren't avoiding your calls," he tried to explain himself, turning his chair so that now he faced the huge glass window behind him.
"I was in an important meeting earlier with a big client. I can't possibly make him wait just to take your call, can I?" He reasoned out. He left his comfortable seat and looked at the busy streets of Seoul form his view 27 floors above the sea level. Leaning his forehead against the cool surface of the glass, he sighed.
".. Yes, I know. Once you come back from New York, everything would be settled," he mumbled to the phone.
He paused. "When will you be back? Did you alter your arrival date?"
He widened his eyes, "Three days later? Hyukkie, you told me you'd only come back in a month!!"
"Alright, alright.. I know. Geez, now I understand why Dad appointed you as my deputy," KangTa smiled despite the exhausted lilt in his voice. "Have a safe journey. ..Okay. See you then. I'll get Tony to pick you up at the airport."
With another forced smile, he pressed the off button on his handphone and carelessly threw it across the room. By sheer luck, it landed with a soft sound on the marine-blue sofa at the corner of his room after hitting the glass wall beside the door. Folding his arms across his chest, he leaned his side against the glass surface.
Since when did he start feeling so tired?
He sighed audibly, eyes still focused on the long lines of cars on the streets below him. From his higher point of view, Seoul seemed like a small playground, complete with artificial trees, cars, buildings and any other structures to complete the mechanism of a busy city. He held his throbbing temples with two fingers, slightly noticing the rising warmth of his forehead. He groaned inwardly. He could not afford to fall sick. Definitely not now. Or any other time for that matter. He had way too many things waiting for him to settle that he could not afford any time for himself.
"Mr. Ahn?"
There was a soft knock on the door, before it opened revealing a young female with a green folder in her hands.
"Yes, YoungEun?" KangTa responded without a look. He did not need to turn around to check who the person was for he only allowed his personal secretary to enter his office.
"You have an appointment later with Mr. Lee and Mr. Shin of-"
"Could you postpone that for another date?"
"Yes, of course, Sir," his secretary answered, making some notes on the paper on her hands. She looked up to see her employer looking through the glass with an expression that she had never seen him with. All these years of being his secretary, she had hardly seen her young CEO sporting such melancholy façade.
"Mr. Ahn, you don't look well.. Do you want me to cancel the meeting with the Board of Directors later?"
KangTa seemed to be in deep thoughts as he kept his eyes down.
"Sir?"
"Yes, please.." He finally answered, moving away from his immobile position by the huge windowpane. He grabbed his overall and picked his keys from the table. He made his way towards the door, retrieving his forgotten handphone while on the way.
"Thank you very much, YoungEun. And please inform Tony that WooHyuk's date of arrival has been changed to three days later," he instructed with that mellow voice of his.
"Yes, Sir.."
With one last tired smile, he exited his office and made his way out of the building. His thoughts had been quite blank as he descended the lift. He could not help but think that he needed something from his mundane life. His daily routines and tasks had been draining him of any zest of life that hardly remained in his body once he took over the post of the President of his father's company.
He looked up at the cloudy sky, pushing both hands deep in the recesses of his jacket.
When would he be able to find some comfort in this meaningless world?
[We'll fly like a bird
In the scattered cloudy sky.]
When would he be able to find some comfort in this meaningless world?
HeeJun sighed, letting his legs bring him to wherever he was heading to. JaeWon had insisted on meeting him over dinner. That suited him just fine. It gave him ample time to escape from the hustle of his duties as the president of his company. He gave a wan smile, something that he did more often than he realised, and ran one hand through his black hair.
Since when life seemed so unbearable?
Without his own knowledge, he had somehow arrived at a park, a few blocks near his office. It was quite amazing actually, that in the middle of the business district, they, whoever they were, had managed to situate such a grand park. He caught sight of the shimmering lake and made his way there. He stood beneath the weeping willow by the side of the lake and marvelled at how magnificent such simple scenery could be.
Kneeling, he let one hand trace the surface of the lake, relishing the cool feeling that the sun-bathed water provided. The water was so clear that if there was no wind that caused the ripples to surface, he could see his own reflection. His well-sculpted eyebrow arched in a small frown when he realised that his fluid counterpart bore brown strands of chin-length hair instead of the black he sported. His hand paused midway in the water, as if afraid that the slightest movement he made would break the fragile vision held in his eyes.
A loud splash broke his tranquillity into glittering pieces of glass as in a moment of astonishment, his hand swept over the reflection he was trying so hard to preserve. He looked around him, scanning the perimeter of the lake, willing himself to spot whatever thing that broke his concentration. Yet, besides a few people taking a leisure stroll behind him, he saw no one else.
"Who is he?"
He wondered quietly to himself. Sighing for no particular reason at all, he wiped his wet hand on the side of his black jacket. Some things just were not meant to be. He closed his eyes, trying to remember the image he had vaguely seen earlier. And when he saw a hazy shadow of that particular someone whom he deemed a stranger, he felt an upsurge of warmth in his being. He felt, rather than saw, the other person held his wrist and gave him a shy smile.
HeeJun opened his onyx orbs abruptly, feeling the rush of blood in his face.
How could a stranger, someone he did not even know existed, make him feel so strongly?
He shook his head, making black strands of hair fly in the air. He had better get going before JaeWon started whining from the wait he had make him bear. He chuckled as he imagined his cousin waiting impatiently in the restaurant. As his black leather shoes left the grass patch and climbed onto the cemented walkway of the park, HeeJun could not help but smile when his thoughts brought him back to the memory of that flawless face he saw a few moments ago.
And when his intelligence reminded him of that angelic smile, he felt his own lips twitch in the beginning of a similar action. Pausing mid-stride, he frowned when he thought he heard a soft voice calling his name. He turned around trying to put a name to that hauntingly familiar voice. But when he was, again, greeted by silence, he could only sigh.
It must have been the wind.
[Leave aside the city worries
It's just a minute away..]
KangTa looked over his shoulder, a minute frown present in his tanned face. Exhaling slowly, he shifted his gaze back to the lake in front of him. He must have been hearing things. The park was void of any people he knew. No one could have called his name. He ran his fingers through his short brown strands, disentangling the knots that managed to form in his normally neat hairstyle. People told him that if he was too tired, his mind would began to stimulate things which caused hallucinations to occur.
He smiled to himself. It must have been it.
Settling down to sit on the grass patch just beneath the willow trees, he looked across the vast horizon and awed at how such a serene scenery still exist in reality. He thought that the only one left was within his memories. He missed those good old days he had with his friends while he was younger. He caught sight of a group of high school boys playing a game of soccer at the field to his south-western side and gave a wan smile. He was once a carefree soul, with no worries piled on his shoulders except for the fear of failing his tests.
Life was so simple then. Yet beautiful.
It was not until a fatal accident took his father away from him, leaving his mother bed-ridden with depression which meant that he would have to succeed his father's position and resume the family's business. He sighed again, seriously feeling that he would start to die slowly if he sighed too much. Closing his eyes, he focused his vision on the random, blinding light against the dark backdrop of his eyelids. Not for long, he lost concentration and his mind started to drift.
Within the recesses of his mind, he thought he saw a flick of black hair and a pair of exotic onyx eyes. He frowned, not able to put a name in that hazy shadow. He wondered if it was due to his overly imaginative mind, but he saw the figure, albeit blurred, extending one hand towards him. When he felt himself reaching out for that hand, he heard a vague voice calling his name.
/ChilHyun../
He jerked up in an abrupt motion, taking in his surroundings. Who could have known his real name? When was the last time anyone ever called him that? Drawing one knee up, he looked at his palm and stared at it as if it was the most intriguing object on Earth. Was the whole thing a result of his imaginative mind? If it was, then why did the touch feel so real? So real that he thought the other person, whoever he was, would bring him out of his lifeless routine.
Who is he?
/ChilHyun../
He looked over his shoulder again, before scanning the perimeter of the park.
It must have been the wind..
He felt something vibrated within the pocket of his trench coat and immediately fished a white cellphone out. He looked at the numbers displayed on the screen and gave a small smile. WooHyuk must have realised that he had sneaked out of the office despite his warnings. Flicking the cover open, he brought the phone close to his ear, ready to hear the screams from the other line.
While listening patiently to the mock-threats and growls, his mind thought of the figure he saw earlier and somehow, he felt a small warmth escalating within him.
[In my heart, I'll paint a picture
And I swear it's where I'll be..]
"No, it's alright. Keep the meeting schedule for tomorrow."
JaeWon peered up from behind his tall glass of drink to look at his cousin. He sighed, twirling the ice cubes in the glass with the straw that was held gently by two fingers. His cousin never seemed to be free from work. Every time he had the rare chance to meet up with him, there would always be at least one interruption from his handphone. No matter who the person on the other line was.
"Yes.."
He caught the black-haired youth giving him an apologetic smile and he just shook his head in assurance. He wondered if he would be in the same shoes as his cousin was once the Exodus land on his hands. He pouted at the prospective ugly circumstance.
"When's the next free day I have?"
"Oh.. I see. Alright. Thank you, Rina. And please, go home, it's way past your knock-off time."
HeeJun gently pushed the cover of his handphone with a thumb, heaving a long sigh. he closed his eyes when he noticed the irritating throbbing at the back of his head once again making its presence known.
"What's wrong?"
He opened one black eye and chuckled at the cute frown he was receiving from his younger dongsaeng.
"Why are you laughing?" JaeWon asked, the small frown deepened on his features.
"You looked so cute like that," HeeJun managed in between his giggles.
"I'm always *this* cute!" He pouted, as if he just received the biggest insult in his life.
If HeeJun were an anime character, a large droplet of sweat would have made its way down his temples.
"Stop laughing," the taller boy whined.
HeeJun just shook his head in amusement. Picking up his drinks, he took a small sip of the cold beverage, relishing the cool feeling down his throat. "So," he started, setting the glass on the table. "What were we talking about earlier?"
JaeWon shrugged. "I don't know.. What do you feel like talking about?"
"Well.."
"What's in your mind?"
"Someone.." He whispered.
"Hn?"
"No.. Nothing. It's just that.." HeeJun trailed off.
JaeWon waited patiently, encouraging his cousin to go on.
"Have you ever felt like running away?"
The tall boy with brown hair leaned back against his chair. "Well.. Not yet."
HeeJun gave a subdued smile. "It's just that sometimes.. Sometimes I feel like I don't have a life."
He paused, exhaling the breath that he did not realise had been holding. "I kept imagining a place where I could find solitude within it.. And perhaps someone to confide in.."
"Hyung.."
HeeJun looked at JaeWon. "Don't give me that look."
The other figure chuckled. "I think you need a girlfriend."
HeeJun halted with his glass of water held in mid-air as he widened his eyes.
"What??"
[Come and look in silence
Believe in what you see
(In a place like this)]
"What did you say?"
"I said, you look so forlorn that I thought you might be dumped."
KangTa made a confused face. "I'm not dumped."
"I know you're not dumped."
"Then?" KangTa's frown deepened as he twirled the pen held by his fingers absently.
WooHyuk shook his head in amusement. "I said," he started. "You looked like that. Doesn't mean you really are."
"Oh," came the monosyllabic response.
WooHyuk looked at his president sitting across him. He was gone for barely three weeks and his friend looked so different from what he remembered. Beneath those liquid brown eyes were a light shade of black, indicating roughly the amount of sleep he had forfeited. He looked pale even with his tanned skin and WooHyuk swore to himself that he lost weight. Even with the suit and clothes serving as a cover to his true figure, it was still obvious to his trained eyes. After all, he had seen KangTa from the beginning of his life.
"Are you alright?" He asked carefully.
KangTa looked up from reading the document that he was supposed to sign. "Why?"
"You looked so.."
KangTa smiled, shifting his gaze back to the stack of papers and putting his signature on it after he finished comprehending the content. "So what, Hyukkie?"
"Crestfallen."
KangTa chuckled, leaning back into the cushion of his seat.
"Are you alright?" Came the repeated question.
Intertwining his fingers, KangTa stared blankly at his deputy. When the concerned gaze he was given started to unnerve him, he bit his lips in a nervous gesture.
"Are you alright?"
His mind raked itself for some smart answer that could put WooHyuk off guard, but somehow at that present occurrence, his intelligence failed him. Perhaps it was the genuine concern he heard from the repeated question, perhaps it was just the lonely part of him that took charge of his demeanour, but at the worried voice, KangTa could feel something press against the back of his eyes.
"KangTa?"
"I.. I'm alright."
"Liar."
"Hyukkie, I can't not be alright, can I? Even if I know I'm not.."
He sighed, averting his gaze to the smooth surface of his working desk. "I don't have a life.."
WooHyuk was about to say something but whatever it was supposed to be, he had no chance to say it out for a knock on the door interrupted him.
"Mr. Ahn, Mr. Jang. The meeting's starting in five minutes."
KangTa gave his secretary a smile. "Thank you, YoungEun. I assume the materials have been prepared?"
"Yes, Sir," the lady in black answered in a pleasant alto tone.
"Alright, thank you." KangTa turned to look at WooHyuk. "Going?"
WooHyuk opened his mouth and was about to protest, but when he caught the resigned expression on the other's features, he could only shake his head.
"Let's go.."
He received a forced smile from the seemingly subdued figure.
"KangTa."
"Yeah?"
"I think you need a girlfriend."
"What?" He gave an incredulous look.
"I'm serious," WooHyuk chuckled, opening the door to the conference room. "You need one. Fast."
[The starry skies can move the mountains
The sun will warm the sea..]
HeeJun slammed his fist against the insides of the elevator where he was in at that moment. That had got to be the damnest meeting he had ever have. He was fortunate he had foreshadowed that the economy would face a downturn and that his company's financial abilities would be affected. He was really fortunate. For if he had not anticipated anything, he might very well be preparing to give up all his shares of the company to their biggest rival.
"Mr. Moon, Sir, your hand.."
HeeJun sighed. He had forgotten that he was not alone in the elevator.
"It's alright," he answered the unspoken question, feeling his knuckles throb. "Just make sure what I said earlier in the meeting is carried out."
"Yes, Sir."
HeeJun left the building briskly. His chauffeur had already waited at the foyer with the door to his Mercedes Benz open. Ignoring the pain resonating within his skull, he slipped in and immediately threw his whole weight on the cushioned seat. He felt so tired. So mentally exhausted that he wished he would just vanish there and then.
"Where would you like to go, Sir?"
"Anywhere."
The chauffeur in black uniform looked flabbergasted at the response. "Anywhere Sir?" He asked timidly.
"Yes, anywhere. Just start the engine."
Somehow understanding the internal turmoil that his young master experienced, the chauffeur ignited the engine of the car and not for long, the sleek black Benz was already amongst the many cars on the busy roads of Seoul.
HeeJun looked at the trees and people that seemed to be run in a blur of colours by the roadside as his car sped on the road. Propping his chin with one palm, he stared at the carefree pedestrians who did not seem to have too many burdens on their shoulders. He realised where that train of thoughts was going and immediately cut off any possible disturbances that would affect the stability of his mind. He sighed again, remembering what JaeWon told him a few nights ago.
He really needed someone in his life.
"Wait. Stop the car!" He suddenly said, while the building he had just seen earlier held his sight captive.
"Here, Sir?" The chauffeur asked, taking notice of the huge sign in front of him that stated that no vehicle should stop.
"Yes!!"
At the urgency tinting that one word HeeJun uttered, the chauffeur immediately stepped on the brake, sending the car into an abrupt halt. HeeJun pulled the door handle and stepped out of the car, not once his eyes left that building. There was something in it that intrigued his troubled mind. It was as if there was an invisible force drawing him nearer, pulling him closer.
"Sir, it's drizzling!!"
"It's alright.." HeeJun's voice was distant, as if he was in a trance.
"But.."
"I'll go back by myself."
Ignoring the feeble protest from his concerned chauffeur, HeeJun walked towards the white building. Slowly ascending the steps, he stopped in front of the well-crafted double doors. Never in his life had he stepped a foot inside a church and yet, at the moment, he was standing in front of a cathedral with the intention of going in nonetheless. Putting all the random questions popping within his brain away, his hand gently held the silver handle and pushed the wooden door open.
[In my heart, I'll paint a picture
And I swear it's where I'll be..]
Noticing how the sky was painted grey, he allowed himself a small smile. It was as if the heaven knew exactly how he was feeling inside, and made the sky a mirror of his heart.
KangTa took a deep breath and pushed the wooden door open. Stepping inside, he felt the serenity of the atmosphere enveloping him like a lover's embrace. He walked down the aisle, taking note of the parchment of glass-art painted on the ceiling and some portions of the walls. He felt so calm and peaceful inside it affrighted him.
Taking a seat on one of the benches along the red-carpeted aisle, he gazed at the huge cross hanging against the mildly coloured backdrop of glass. Recollection of his past, circumstances of the present and premonitions of his rather bleak future flooded his mind in an unstoppable wave of memories.
He thought of his late father, the authoritative figure in the company who changed drastically to become the most understanding father he had ever seen in his life once he stepped into his home. He thought of his mother, the widow who wallowed in a well of depression since the departure of her husband. He closed his eyes as once again the vision of his once beautiful mother, waking up everyday only with tears streaming her face, emerged within his consciousness. And he felt his heart ache. That well was just too deep for him to be able to pull her out.
He thought of his company, the very firm that his father view as his life, where all his sweat and hard work had been poured into and with the utmost effort he could muster. What kind of a son would he be if he let the company fall in his hands? From that day he stepped up the social ladder, he lost the last semblance of life he possessed. He lost his identity. Everything had been replaced. The fake smiles hurt his jaw, the proper posture hurt his physique, and the forced social gestures hurt his mind..
As he felt his eyes well up with long suppressed tears, he prayed for that little bit of sanity buried within him not to disappear.
He dimly heard the door being pushed open and slowly, he looked over his shoulder when he heard the footsteps approaching him. He frowned when he seemed to recognise that figure. The light shining against the person was creating a silhouette-like effect, and somehow it reminded him of the person haunting his dreams since that day in the park.
When his was able to make out the outline clearer, he stifled a gasp.
/It's him../
[I shall be there
Will you be there?]
HeeJun entered the cathedral, only to be overwhelmed by the feelings that just came hitting him in an un-warned maelstrom. He remembered why he had avoided such places like a plague in the past. Sometimes, the feeling of being in a place so holy was too immense it would leave him astounded. He still could not comprehend his decision of going inside the church, except for the indescribable urge surging within him to do so.
Shaking his head from the absurdity of his actions, he resumed his steps down the red-carpeted aisle between the neat rows of lined wooden benches. He shifted his gaze from the magnificent work of art against the huge crucifix at the back of the church to the lone figure sitting on one of the benches. He slowed down his pace as he somehow felt that the shadow of the brown-haired figure was just too familiar for his own comfort.
He nearly gasped when the exact same pair of deep brown eyes from his vivid imagination was staring right back at him there and then. While his rationale mind was screaming uncontrollably, willing for an explanation for the seemingly eerie meeting to rise, his heart ached at the sight of those liquid pools shielded with unshed tears.
Out of impulse, he closed his eyes with a frown on his features and pulled the startled figure in, enclosing him in a loose embrace.
He did not know exactly why, but he seemed to understand the reasons behind those tears. He was too familiar with that hopelessness radiating from those eyes, too acquainted with the despair reflected in that beautiful face, too accustomed with that faltering sanity he deduced with one look at the brown-head's demeanour. He knew. For he had seen all that etched every morning in his mirrored reflection.
"Don't worry, I'll be here for you.." He whispered, not really able to decide if he had meant that phrase to himself, or to the other presence in the church.
[I shall be there
Will you be there too?]
KangTa was astonished when he found himself within the embrace of that familiar stranger. He was about to protest when the soft, calming voice stopped him.
"Don't worry, I'll be here for you.."
The voice was distant, yet he could decipher the underlying bitterness hidden within those words. While the surprise he felt was more than sufficient to baffle his whole mind, his emotions had already taken control of his whole being. His last peripheral defences broke into irretrievable fragments when he felt the arms tightening the hold on him. Giving the softer side of him complete control, he leaned his forehead on the stranger's shoulder and began to cry.
[I shall be there,
Will you be there?]
"Will we meet again?"
The black haired figure paused mid-step at the question posed to him and turned around to face KangTa. He gave the other person a rather genuine smile and closed the gap between them to place a feather-light kiss on the brown-framed cheek.
"I'm HeeJun. What about you?"
"Chil.. ChilHyun," he managed to answer despite the flush creeping up his face.
"Thank you.."
With another smile as his unspoken answer, HeeJun left the church, leaving KangTa in a daze.
KangTa shook himself out of his reverie and a small lilt of happiness brightened his face as the meaning of that last smile he saw dawned on him. The silent promise he was given had worth much more than it would, had it been conveyed out in words.
In that smile, that warmth that resonated within his sentience, he found the solitude that he had been searching all his life. He knew, with that one look, that he would not need to be alone anymore. Neither would HeeJun be.
He embarked on a journey of no return when he resumed office in his company a few years back. He found his sanity faltering and his life wafting away from his side as each day passed. He thought he had lost sight of his harbour for good when the only thing he could see was the vast, blue horizon of the ocean.
He was glad he finally found his way back home.
/I'll be there for you../
'I'll be there for you too..'
~ END~
Author: althea / 79_percent
Rating: PG-13
Form: One-shot, Songfic
Fandom: H.O.T
Pairing: JunTa
Genre: Mild Angst
Lyrics: B*Witched - I Shall Be There
Summary: They never met before, and yet they knew they're meant for each other.
A HOT -Birthday Dedication- Fiction
"Miracle"
Part 1/1
~*~
[Awaken, breathe;
Hear the calling in the wind..]
"Mr. Moon."
HeeJun pressed a specific, grey button on his telephone while his other hand kept typing furiously on his keyboard.
"Yes, Rina?" He addressed his secretary over the intra-company telephone network. He gave a sharp frown to himself when his screen displayed the words in bold red, indicating that his attempt to access his personal account had been denied. Strange, he mused. He had never made any wrong input before, especially when it concerned his password.
"Mr. Lee is on the third line," the sweet voice informed him politely.
"Which Mr. Lee?" He did not recall any Lees in any of his latest transactions. Even if at the very least he had ten cases on his hands there and then, he could be sure none of them bore the surname Lee. He typed a few more commands before pressing the 'enter' button. When the window started to load, he gave a satisfactory smile and leaned well back onto his cushioned chair.
"It's Lee JaeWon-sshi, the future heir of the Exodus Hotel."
HeeJun chuckled at the mention of his cousin being called the 'heir' to his father's vast enterprise. He knew well that his cousin was reluctant to serve in the hospitality industry in which the family had been running on for generations. He would rather pursue his career in arts. And perhaps, to escape the rigid hold of the world and fly to somewhere peaceful with a particular sweet someone.
"Mr. Moon? Sir? Are you still there?" HeeJun heard the worried tone in his employee's voice.
"Ah, yes, I'm sorry. Could you transfer him to my private line, please, Rina. Thank you very much."
"You're welcome, Sir."
Hearing the soft buzzing sound of his other telephone by the window, HeeJun sighed, suddenly feeling a growing headache at the back of his skull. He picked the receiver up and promised his exhausted mind for a painkiller later.
"Yoboseyo?"
[The voice, it's saying
That a journey must begin..]
"Yoboseyo?"
["KangTa! Stop avoiding my calls!!"]
The young CEO immediately put his handphone further away from his ear as the person across the line hollered, almost effectively deafening his ear. He winced when the shouts resumed for a little more than two minutes. When he heard the audible breathing as the other person stopped screaming, he timidly placed his phone back to his ear and asked, "You done?"
["NO!"]
"Wait, wait!! WooHyuk, I weren't avoiding your calls," he tried to explain himself, turning his chair so that now he faced the huge glass window behind him.
"I was in an important meeting earlier with a big client. I can't possibly make him wait just to take your call, can I?" He reasoned out. He left his comfortable seat and looked at the busy streets of Seoul form his view 27 floors above the sea level. Leaning his forehead against the cool surface of the glass, he sighed.
".. Yes, I know. Once you come back from New York, everything would be settled," he mumbled to the phone.
He paused. "When will you be back? Did you alter your arrival date?"
He widened his eyes, "Three days later? Hyukkie, you told me you'd only come back in a month!!"
"Alright, alright.. I know. Geez, now I understand why Dad appointed you as my deputy," KangTa smiled despite the exhausted lilt in his voice. "Have a safe journey. ..Okay. See you then. I'll get Tony to pick you up at the airport."
With another forced smile, he pressed the off button on his handphone and carelessly threw it across the room. By sheer luck, it landed with a soft sound on the marine-blue sofa at the corner of his room after hitting the glass wall beside the door. Folding his arms across his chest, he leaned his side against the glass surface.
Since when did he start feeling so tired?
He sighed audibly, eyes still focused on the long lines of cars on the streets below him. From his higher point of view, Seoul seemed like a small playground, complete with artificial trees, cars, buildings and any other structures to complete the mechanism of a busy city. He held his throbbing temples with two fingers, slightly noticing the rising warmth of his forehead. He groaned inwardly. He could not afford to fall sick. Definitely not now. Or any other time for that matter. He had way too many things waiting for him to settle that he could not afford any time for himself.
"Mr. Ahn?"
There was a soft knock on the door, before it opened revealing a young female with a green folder in her hands.
"Yes, YoungEun?" KangTa responded without a look. He did not need to turn around to check who the person was for he only allowed his personal secretary to enter his office.
"You have an appointment later with Mr. Lee and Mr. Shin of-"
"Could you postpone that for another date?"
"Yes, of course, Sir," his secretary answered, making some notes on the paper on her hands. She looked up to see her employer looking through the glass with an expression that she had never seen him with. All these years of being his secretary, she had hardly seen her young CEO sporting such melancholy façade.
"Mr. Ahn, you don't look well.. Do you want me to cancel the meeting with the Board of Directors later?"
KangTa seemed to be in deep thoughts as he kept his eyes down.
"Sir?"
"Yes, please.." He finally answered, moving away from his immobile position by the huge windowpane. He grabbed his overall and picked his keys from the table. He made his way towards the door, retrieving his forgotten handphone while on the way.
"Thank you very much, YoungEun. And please inform Tony that WooHyuk's date of arrival has been changed to three days later," he instructed with that mellow voice of his.
"Yes, Sir.."
With one last tired smile, he exited his office and made his way out of the building. His thoughts had been quite blank as he descended the lift. He could not help but think that he needed something from his mundane life. His daily routines and tasks had been draining him of any zest of life that hardly remained in his body once he took over the post of the President of his father's company.
He looked up at the cloudy sky, pushing both hands deep in the recesses of his jacket.
When would he be able to find some comfort in this meaningless world?
[We'll fly like a bird
In the scattered cloudy sky.]
When would he be able to find some comfort in this meaningless world?
HeeJun sighed, letting his legs bring him to wherever he was heading to. JaeWon had insisted on meeting him over dinner. That suited him just fine. It gave him ample time to escape from the hustle of his duties as the president of his company. He gave a wan smile, something that he did more often than he realised, and ran one hand through his black hair.
Since when life seemed so unbearable?
Without his own knowledge, he had somehow arrived at a park, a few blocks near his office. It was quite amazing actually, that in the middle of the business district, they, whoever they were, had managed to situate such a grand park. He caught sight of the shimmering lake and made his way there. He stood beneath the weeping willow by the side of the lake and marvelled at how magnificent such simple scenery could be.
Kneeling, he let one hand trace the surface of the lake, relishing the cool feeling that the sun-bathed water provided. The water was so clear that if there was no wind that caused the ripples to surface, he could see his own reflection. His well-sculpted eyebrow arched in a small frown when he realised that his fluid counterpart bore brown strands of chin-length hair instead of the black he sported. His hand paused midway in the water, as if afraid that the slightest movement he made would break the fragile vision held in his eyes.
A loud splash broke his tranquillity into glittering pieces of glass as in a moment of astonishment, his hand swept over the reflection he was trying so hard to preserve. He looked around him, scanning the perimeter of the lake, willing himself to spot whatever thing that broke his concentration. Yet, besides a few people taking a leisure stroll behind him, he saw no one else.
"Who is he?"
He wondered quietly to himself. Sighing for no particular reason at all, he wiped his wet hand on the side of his black jacket. Some things just were not meant to be. He closed his eyes, trying to remember the image he had vaguely seen earlier. And when he saw a hazy shadow of that particular someone whom he deemed a stranger, he felt an upsurge of warmth in his being. He felt, rather than saw, the other person held his wrist and gave him a shy smile.
HeeJun opened his onyx orbs abruptly, feeling the rush of blood in his face.
How could a stranger, someone he did not even know existed, make him feel so strongly?
He shook his head, making black strands of hair fly in the air. He had better get going before JaeWon started whining from the wait he had make him bear. He chuckled as he imagined his cousin waiting impatiently in the restaurant. As his black leather shoes left the grass patch and climbed onto the cemented walkway of the park, HeeJun could not help but smile when his thoughts brought him back to the memory of that flawless face he saw a few moments ago.
And when his intelligence reminded him of that angelic smile, he felt his own lips twitch in the beginning of a similar action. Pausing mid-stride, he frowned when he thought he heard a soft voice calling his name. He turned around trying to put a name to that hauntingly familiar voice. But when he was, again, greeted by silence, he could only sigh.
It must have been the wind.
[Leave aside the city worries
It's just a minute away..]
KangTa looked over his shoulder, a minute frown present in his tanned face. Exhaling slowly, he shifted his gaze back to the lake in front of him. He must have been hearing things. The park was void of any people he knew. No one could have called his name. He ran his fingers through his short brown strands, disentangling the knots that managed to form in his normally neat hairstyle. People told him that if he was too tired, his mind would began to stimulate things which caused hallucinations to occur.
He smiled to himself. It must have been it.
Settling down to sit on the grass patch just beneath the willow trees, he looked across the vast horizon and awed at how such a serene scenery still exist in reality. He thought that the only one left was within his memories. He missed those good old days he had with his friends while he was younger. He caught sight of a group of high school boys playing a game of soccer at the field to his south-western side and gave a wan smile. He was once a carefree soul, with no worries piled on his shoulders except for the fear of failing his tests.
Life was so simple then. Yet beautiful.
It was not until a fatal accident took his father away from him, leaving his mother bed-ridden with depression which meant that he would have to succeed his father's position and resume the family's business. He sighed again, seriously feeling that he would start to die slowly if he sighed too much. Closing his eyes, he focused his vision on the random, blinding light against the dark backdrop of his eyelids. Not for long, he lost concentration and his mind started to drift.
Within the recesses of his mind, he thought he saw a flick of black hair and a pair of exotic onyx eyes. He frowned, not able to put a name in that hazy shadow. He wondered if it was due to his overly imaginative mind, but he saw the figure, albeit blurred, extending one hand towards him. When he felt himself reaching out for that hand, he heard a vague voice calling his name.
/ChilHyun../
He jerked up in an abrupt motion, taking in his surroundings. Who could have known his real name? When was the last time anyone ever called him that? Drawing one knee up, he looked at his palm and stared at it as if it was the most intriguing object on Earth. Was the whole thing a result of his imaginative mind? If it was, then why did the touch feel so real? So real that he thought the other person, whoever he was, would bring him out of his lifeless routine.
Who is he?
/ChilHyun../
He looked over his shoulder again, before scanning the perimeter of the park.
It must have been the wind..
He felt something vibrated within the pocket of his trench coat and immediately fished a white cellphone out. He looked at the numbers displayed on the screen and gave a small smile. WooHyuk must have realised that he had sneaked out of the office despite his warnings. Flicking the cover open, he brought the phone close to his ear, ready to hear the screams from the other line.
While listening patiently to the mock-threats and growls, his mind thought of the figure he saw earlier and somehow, he felt a small warmth escalating within him.
[In my heart, I'll paint a picture
And I swear it's where I'll be..]
"No, it's alright. Keep the meeting schedule for tomorrow."
JaeWon peered up from behind his tall glass of drink to look at his cousin. He sighed, twirling the ice cubes in the glass with the straw that was held gently by two fingers. His cousin never seemed to be free from work. Every time he had the rare chance to meet up with him, there would always be at least one interruption from his handphone. No matter who the person on the other line was.
"Yes.."
He caught the black-haired youth giving him an apologetic smile and he just shook his head in assurance. He wondered if he would be in the same shoes as his cousin was once the Exodus land on his hands. He pouted at the prospective ugly circumstance.
"When's the next free day I have?"
"Oh.. I see. Alright. Thank you, Rina. And please, go home, it's way past your knock-off time."
HeeJun gently pushed the cover of his handphone with a thumb, heaving a long sigh. he closed his eyes when he noticed the irritating throbbing at the back of his head once again making its presence known.
"What's wrong?"
He opened one black eye and chuckled at the cute frown he was receiving from his younger dongsaeng.
"Why are you laughing?" JaeWon asked, the small frown deepened on his features.
"You looked so cute like that," HeeJun managed in between his giggles.
"I'm always *this* cute!" He pouted, as if he just received the biggest insult in his life.
If HeeJun were an anime character, a large droplet of sweat would have made its way down his temples.
"Stop laughing," the taller boy whined.
HeeJun just shook his head in amusement. Picking up his drinks, he took a small sip of the cold beverage, relishing the cool feeling down his throat. "So," he started, setting the glass on the table. "What were we talking about earlier?"
JaeWon shrugged. "I don't know.. What do you feel like talking about?"
"Well.."
"What's in your mind?"
"Someone.." He whispered.
"Hn?"
"No.. Nothing. It's just that.." HeeJun trailed off.
JaeWon waited patiently, encouraging his cousin to go on.
"Have you ever felt like running away?"
The tall boy with brown hair leaned back against his chair. "Well.. Not yet."
HeeJun gave a subdued smile. "It's just that sometimes.. Sometimes I feel like I don't have a life."
He paused, exhaling the breath that he did not realise had been holding. "I kept imagining a place where I could find solitude within it.. And perhaps someone to confide in.."
"Hyung.."
HeeJun looked at JaeWon. "Don't give me that look."
The other figure chuckled. "I think you need a girlfriend."
HeeJun halted with his glass of water held in mid-air as he widened his eyes.
"What??"
[Come and look in silence
Believe in what you see
(In a place like this)]
"What did you say?"
"I said, you look so forlorn that I thought you might be dumped."
KangTa made a confused face. "I'm not dumped."
"I know you're not dumped."
"Then?" KangTa's frown deepened as he twirled the pen held by his fingers absently.
WooHyuk shook his head in amusement. "I said," he started. "You looked like that. Doesn't mean you really are."
"Oh," came the monosyllabic response.
WooHyuk looked at his president sitting across him. He was gone for barely three weeks and his friend looked so different from what he remembered. Beneath those liquid brown eyes were a light shade of black, indicating roughly the amount of sleep he had forfeited. He looked pale even with his tanned skin and WooHyuk swore to himself that he lost weight. Even with the suit and clothes serving as a cover to his true figure, it was still obvious to his trained eyes. After all, he had seen KangTa from the beginning of his life.
"Are you alright?" He asked carefully.
KangTa looked up from reading the document that he was supposed to sign. "Why?"
"You looked so.."
KangTa smiled, shifting his gaze back to the stack of papers and putting his signature on it after he finished comprehending the content. "So what, Hyukkie?"
"Crestfallen."
KangTa chuckled, leaning back into the cushion of his seat.
"Are you alright?" Came the repeated question.
Intertwining his fingers, KangTa stared blankly at his deputy. When the concerned gaze he was given started to unnerve him, he bit his lips in a nervous gesture.
"Are you alright?"
His mind raked itself for some smart answer that could put WooHyuk off guard, but somehow at that present occurrence, his intelligence failed him. Perhaps it was the genuine concern he heard from the repeated question, perhaps it was just the lonely part of him that took charge of his demeanour, but at the worried voice, KangTa could feel something press against the back of his eyes.
"KangTa?"
"I.. I'm alright."
"Liar."
"Hyukkie, I can't not be alright, can I? Even if I know I'm not.."
He sighed, averting his gaze to the smooth surface of his working desk. "I don't have a life.."
WooHyuk was about to say something but whatever it was supposed to be, he had no chance to say it out for a knock on the door interrupted him.
"Mr. Ahn, Mr. Jang. The meeting's starting in five minutes."
KangTa gave his secretary a smile. "Thank you, YoungEun. I assume the materials have been prepared?"
"Yes, Sir," the lady in black answered in a pleasant alto tone.
"Alright, thank you." KangTa turned to look at WooHyuk. "Going?"
WooHyuk opened his mouth and was about to protest, but when he caught the resigned expression on the other's features, he could only shake his head.
"Let's go.."
He received a forced smile from the seemingly subdued figure.
"KangTa."
"Yeah?"
"I think you need a girlfriend."
"What?" He gave an incredulous look.
"I'm serious," WooHyuk chuckled, opening the door to the conference room. "You need one. Fast."
[The starry skies can move the mountains
The sun will warm the sea..]
HeeJun slammed his fist against the insides of the elevator where he was in at that moment. That had got to be the damnest meeting he had ever have. He was fortunate he had foreshadowed that the economy would face a downturn and that his company's financial abilities would be affected. He was really fortunate. For if he had not anticipated anything, he might very well be preparing to give up all his shares of the company to their biggest rival.
"Mr. Moon, Sir, your hand.."
HeeJun sighed. He had forgotten that he was not alone in the elevator.
"It's alright," he answered the unspoken question, feeling his knuckles throb. "Just make sure what I said earlier in the meeting is carried out."
"Yes, Sir."
HeeJun left the building briskly. His chauffeur had already waited at the foyer with the door to his Mercedes Benz open. Ignoring the pain resonating within his skull, he slipped in and immediately threw his whole weight on the cushioned seat. He felt so tired. So mentally exhausted that he wished he would just vanish there and then.
"Where would you like to go, Sir?"
"Anywhere."
The chauffeur in black uniform looked flabbergasted at the response. "Anywhere Sir?" He asked timidly.
"Yes, anywhere. Just start the engine."
Somehow understanding the internal turmoil that his young master experienced, the chauffeur ignited the engine of the car and not for long, the sleek black Benz was already amongst the many cars on the busy roads of Seoul.
HeeJun looked at the trees and people that seemed to be run in a blur of colours by the roadside as his car sped on the road. Propping his chin with one palm, he stared at the carefree pedestrians who did not seem to have too many burdens on their shoulders. He realised where that train of thoughts was going and immediately cut off any possible disturbances that would affect the stability of his mind. He sighed again, remembering what JaeWon told him a few nights ago.
He really needed someone in his life.
"Wait. Stop the car!" He suddenly said, while the building he had just seen earlier held his sight captive.
"Here, Sir?" The chauffeur asked, taking notice of the huge sign in front of him that stated that no vehicle should stop.
"Yes!!"
At the urgency tinting that one word HeeJun uttered, the chauffeur immediately stepped on the brake, sending the car into an abrupt halt. HeeJun pulled the door handle and stepped out of the car, not once his eyes left that building. There was something in it that intrigued his troubled mind. It was as if there was an invisible force drawing him nearer, pulling him closer.
"Sir, it's drizzling!!"
"It's alright.." HeeJun's voice was distant, as if he was in a trance.
"But.."
"I'll go back by myself."
Ignoring the feeble protest from his concerned chauffeur, HeeJun walked towards the white building. Slowly ascending the steps, he stopped in front of the well-crafted double doors. Never in his life had he stepped a foot inside a church and yet, at the moment, he was standing in front of a cathedral with the intention of going in nonetheless. Putting all the random questions popping within his brain away, his hand gently held the silver handle and pushed the wooden door open.
[In my heart, I'll paint a picture
And I swear it's where I'll be..]
Noticing how the sky was painted grey, he allowed himself a small smile. It was as if the heaven knew exactly how he was feeling inside, and made the sky a mirror of his heart.
KangTa took a deep breath and pushed the wooden door open. Stepping inside, he felt the serenity of the atmosphere enveloping him like a lover's embrace. He walked down the aisle, taking note of the parchment of glass-art painted on the ceiling and some portions of the walls. He felt so calm and peaceful inside it affrighted him.
Taking a seat on one of the benches along the red-carpeted aisle, he gazed at the huge cross hanging against the mildly coloured backdrop of glass. Recollection of his past, circumstances of the present and premonitions of his rather bleak future flooded his mind in an unstoppable wave of memories.
He thought of his late father, the authoritative figure in the company who changed drastically to become the most understanding father he had ever seen in his life once he stepped into his home. He thought of his mother, the widow who wallowed in a well of depression since the departure of her husband. He closed his eyes as once again the vision of his once beautiful mother, waking up everyday only with tears streaming her face, emerged within his consciousness. And he felt his heart ache. That well was just too deep for him to be able to pull her out.
He thought of his company, the very firm that his father view as his life, where all his sweat and hard work had been poured into and with the utmost effort he could muster. What kind of a son would he be if he let the company fall in his hands? From that day he stepped up the social ladder, he lost the last semblance of life he possessed. He lost his identity. Everything had been replaced. The fake smiles hurt his jaw, the proper posture hurt his physique, and the forced social gestures hurt his mind..
As he felt his eyes well up with long suppressed tears, he prayed for that little bit of sanity buried within him not to disappear.
He dimly heard the door being pushed open and slowly, he looked over his shoulder when he heard the footsteps approaching him. He frowned when he seemed to recognise that figure. The light shining against the person was creating a silhouette-like effect, and somehow it reminded him of the person haunting his dreams since that day in the park.
When his was able to make out the outline clearer, he stifled a gasp.
/It's him../
[I shall be there
Will you be there?]
HeeJun entered the cathedral, only to be overwhelmed by the feelings that just came hitting him in an un-warned maelstrom. He remembered why he had avoided such places like a plague in the past. Sometimes, the feeling of being in a place so holy was too immense it would leave him astounded. He still could not comprehend his decision of going inside the church, except for the indescribable urge surging within him to do so.
Shaking his head from the absurdity of his actions, he resumed his steps down the red-carpeted aisle between the neat rows of lined wooden benches. He shifted his gaze from the magnificent work of art against the huge crucifix at the back of the church to the lone figure sitting on one of the benches. He slowed down his pace as he somehow felt that the shadow of the brown-haired figure was just too familiar for his own comfort.
He nearly gasped when the exact same pair of deep brown eyes from his vivid imagination was staring right back at him there and then. While his rationale mind was screaming uncontrollably, willing for an explanation for the seemingly eerie meeting to rise, his heart ached at the sight of those liquid pools shielded with unshed tears.
Out of impulse, he closed his eyes with a frown on his features and pulled the startled figure in, enclosing him in a loose embrace.
He did not know exactly why, but he seemed to understand the reasons behind those tears. He was too familiar with that hopelessness radiating from those eyes, too acquainted with the despair reflected in that beautiful face, too accustomed with that faltering sanity he deduced with one look at the brown-head's demeanour. He knew. For he had seen all that etched every morning in his mirrored reflection.
"Don't worry, I'll be here for you.." He whispered, not really able to decide if he had meant that phrase to himself, or to the other presence in the church.
[I shall be there
Will you be there too?]
KangTa was astonished when he found himself within the embrace of that familiar stranger. He was about to protest when the soft, calming voice stopped him.
"Don't worry, I'll be here for you.."
The voice was distant, yet he could decipher the underlying bitterness hidden within those words. While the surprise he felt was more than sufficient to baffle his whole mind, his emotions had already taken control of his whole being. His last peripheral defences broke into irretrievable fragments when he felt the arms tightening the hold on him. Giving the softer side of him complete control, he leaned his forehead on the stranger's shoulder and began to cry.
[I shall be there,
Will you be there?]
"Will we meet again?"
The black haired figure paused mid-step at the question posed to him and turned around to face KangTa. He gave the other person a rather genuine smile and closed the gap between them to place a feather-light kiss on the brown-framed cheek.
"I'm HeeJun. What about you?"
"Chil.. ChilHyun," he managed to answer despite the flush creeping up his face.
"Thank you.."
With another smile as his unspoken answer, HeeJun left the church, leaving KangTa in a daze.
KangTa shook himself out of his reverie and a small lilt of happiness brightened his face as the meaning of that last smile he saw dawned on him. The silent promise he was given had worth much more than it would, had it been conveyed out in words.
In that smile, that warmth that resonated within his sentience, he found the solitude that he had been searching all his life. He knew, with that one look, that he would not need to be alone anymore. Neither would HeeJun be.
He embarked on a journey of no return when he resumed office in his company a few years back. He found his sanity faltering and his life wafting away from his side as each day passed. He thought he had lost sight of his harbour for good when the only thing he could see was the vast, blue horizon of the ocean.
He was glad he finally found his way back home.
/I'll be there for you../
'I'll be there for you too..'
~ END~