And I'm hearing what you say but I just can't make a sound
so yet again at the risk of bearing my soul...to the world.. i think this is necessary...healthy...so i found out my ex is already caught up with another guy, one that fuks with my insecurities, even though i know im better looking then he is...im hurt...my pain has only been intensified...hes caught up in a new romance that has him blinded to see the torture its causing me and leads him to selfish actions...but in all honesty yes i do belive we are in charge of what we think and feel. but this is like an unpleasent nightmare that i just want to end...my friends, family, and myself have never seen this side of me...how did one individual capture me...how did i let this happen, in all honesty I never thought he would be the would to build me up and tear me down like an old abandoned house. the days go by and my lips go dry and my heart beats madly at the thought of them...being happy, you know i was there once holding his hand,kissing his cheek shaving his back....im trying to get by but this is going to take a while therapist say it takes half the time u were together, to feel better so that means about 5months from now...ouch. what kills me the most is hes out there smilling at the moon, looking right through me and every smile i ever gave him. to walk on by without the slightest tear in his eye, and to the other who i just want to claw out his eyes...touching and feeling everything that was once mine...sadly time is leaving me behind. and while there out having dinner kissing going through the honey moon phase, im here trying to carry around a smile when i feel like im falling apart inside....but i know one day i will meet that special guy, and i will look back and go..WTF was i thinking, just wish that day was today. but just know this kiddos...all good things come to an end...so hold on tight while you can.