The X-linked Servitude Gene (Scary Fundies Mark IV)
Long ago-in 1989, to be exact-the Evil Girlfiend* and I attended a public forum, in Salt Lake City where I lived at the time, on whether women should be allowed into the Mormon priesthood. It seemed rather moot to debate an issue on which only God can judge. Still, as recently as 1978 God had changed His omniscient mind on excluding Black males from the priesthood, so perhaps there was some point in expressing hope for greater equality for women, too. Needless to say, the crux of the matter was really the divinely enforced inferiority of women in the LDS Church. Nothing really come out of the discussion, except that opinions were widely-and rancorously-divided; and from the subsequent lack of any celestial weighing-in on the matter, we can assume God wasn't convinced one way or the other, either.
I hadn't thought of the debate-which has undoubtedly been replayed on an annual basis ever since-in ages, but it popped back up, like the headache you thought you'd finally gotten rid of, last week when I received this article by e-mail, with commentary along the lines of "Gosh-isn't it outrageous how women were treated back then?" And all I could think was, Tragically, in some parts of Utah this mindset is contemporary.
And not only in Utah. In fact, the Mormon Church doesn't hold a candle to real Fundamental misogyny. That Housekeeping Monthly article from 1955 is merely the milder, secularized version of this book explaining God's natural order of the household.
It sounds like a coping manual for submitting to that pinheaded, nut-scratching testament to the close relationship between Man and Ape, whom you-accepting your preordained second-class status without question-had the deplorable lack of judgment to marry. If you were lucky; perhaps you had no choice. In neither case do you deserve your pitiable fate.
The Web site doesn't offer much information about the book, aside from "Every Christian wife must, must, must read this," and the excerpt provided doesn't provide much illumination, either. Instead, true insight into the book's message is provided in vast, empty-headed quantity by its readers. The testimonials would be hilarious if they weren't so pathetic. I first encountered the site several days ago, yet I'm still horribly depressed thinking of how many human beings have been utterly destroyed, emotionally and spiritually, in the name of Bronze Age religious dogma. For instance:
I just wanted to write a note to let you know what a blessing your book has been. Months ago my mind was made up to file for a divorce. I was sure that I could live with out my husband and that my girls would be better off with out him for a father. His marijuana use, pornography addiction, pathological lying, and non-support of us had me convinced of it. I was in the process of filing the divorce papers, a couple days before that, my mother gave me “Created to be His Help Meet” and I began reading it. I decided that being a "Christian" woman it was worth while to at least try the Bible's way. I've tried every other way, even followed pastor's advice, my parent's advice, etc., etc., etc, all with the same end result: file for divorce. After reading your book I realized for the first time that God's way is for me to love, respect, honor, and OBEY, no matter what. I now realize that my husband may never change, but that's not what’s important...God wants me to change. For the first time in my 3 years of marriage, I have peace. -E.W.
What's worse, you are required not only to submit to this self-absorbed, philandering, mouth-breathing scuzzball's every whim, you have to do it with a smile:
I can't believe how free I am! I am free in Christ Jesus to walk after the Spirit, the flesh is dead and I am alive in Christ! Praise the Lord! Celebrating Christmas this year with my children with a smile that won't leave my face, serving my 'head' with renewed energy and joy. My husband doesn't notice; he doesn't even really know me (a busy, commanding, visionary that I am happy to help). But I am sure he is enjoying the benefits, all this help without complaint. What is to complain about? I am being led by the Spirit. I used to think "What about my needs?" "Don't I at least get to talk to you once in a while since you are my husband, instead of just taking orders?" "What about a little affection or romance?" But he just doesn't have the time. One night after a very exhausting day I was praying and realized this is God's will for my life: that I be a help meet to this man. But instead of feeling the burden of something I didn't want, I realized God knows best. This realization that to finish in me this work that He started, for me to do and be all He created me to be. I had to live this life and be "deprived" (that's the world talking) of a friendly romantic relationship with my husband. It may always be a master/servant kind of marriage, but Praise be to the Lord, because I don't care anymore. I am free and now when I tell my children to be happy, and when I say "OK" to my husband, "OK, baby, whatever you say. I love you," I am saying it with a happy face. -Laura
She evidently needs more for her "head" than yet another layer of delusions and intracranial lavage. I wonder how many of these "helpmeets" have gone completely nuts and rearranged their appointed Men of God's internal organs with a meat cleaver. Smiling all the while, of course-a gruesome, empty-eyed leer of tooth-clenching derangement broken only by insane cackling, as if someone had strapped Stimpy's Happy Helmet on an animated skull. I read stories like that in the news from time to time.
Funny how seldom Jesus is mentioned in the testimonials. No wussy, New Testament peacenik meek-will-inherit-the-earth philosophy for these all-American hunks of man-flesh!
A friend gave me the Help Meet Book to give to my wife and WOW. I think she read the book in a few days.... I can remember it like it was yesterday, I came home from work, walked through the front door and WHAMMO!!!! My wife looked different. She looked awakened. She greeted me with a big hug, a smile, and a kiss and she said "How was your Day?".... The house was immaculate. The dinner was superb. The laughter and conversation was super.... I will tell you one thing. God Made Man, Man was alone, God Made Woman so Man was not alone. A Help Meet. So, God knew Man needed HELP. So, through all the great things my wife does honoring God, I have straightened my priorities to be head over my wife in everything, from making more decisions, to standing up and becoming a MAN OF GOD. -Kevin
Now the author obviously isn't a Mormon, nor are her kooky fans. Only once or twice in Utah did I meet anyone who was brainwashed to such a disturbing extent. Yet the whole "Help Meet" mentality endures in Mormon doctrine, and certainly remains a fundamental tenet of the Mormon splinter groups living in southern Utah. According to doctrine, a woman cannot achieve salvation without a husband in the priesthood. Similarly, I've read that a Mormon woman's relationship with Jesus is through her husband. Doesn't that sound like a raw deal? There just ain't nothing less satisfying than secondhand Jesus. Seriously, hand-me-down Savior is even worse than used bathwater-even the kind that's all tepid, opaque and scummy. And it's not like there isn't enough Jesus to go around. God is infinite, right? We hardly have to worry about Peak Jesus or anything.
Oh, but wait-the gulf between Man and God is not as vast in Mormonism as it is in most Christian sects. (The mainstream press is all abuzz about Mitt Romney's daring exposé on his own religion, and the notion that we [men] can become gods by our own right has popped up several times that I've read.) God was once human, and if we remain ever obedient to the Church authorities in this life, we may earn passage to the Celestial Kingdom and become gods ourselves. Hence, having known human imperfection, God may not be omnipotent after all. So maybe Jesus, a mere stripling compared to God (the two are distinct in LDS doctrine), isn't as limitless a resource as mainstream Christianity would lead us to believe.
The funny thing is that the large majority of the Mormons I knew were fairly relaxed about gender roles: they'd feel as shocked by those "testimonies" as I was. Now if we can only get the Church leaders and Church doctrine on board with the notion of women's equality.
____________________
*She hasn't been my girlfriend since 1990, and anecdotal evidence suggests she's not even evil anymore; but like President of the United States, the title Evil Girlfiend is granted for life.
I hadn't thought of the debate-which has undoubtedly been replayed on an annual basis ever since-in ages, but it popped back up, like the headache you thought you'd finally gotten rid of, last week when I received this article by e-mail, with commentary along the lines of "Gosh-isn't it outrageous how women were treated back then?" And all I could think was, Tragically, in some parts of Utah this mindset is contemporary.
And not only in Utah. In fact, the Mormon Church doesn't hold a candle to real Fundamental misogyny. That Housekeeping Monthly article from 1955 is merely the milder, secularized version of this book explaining God's natural order of the household.
It sounds like a coping manual for submitting to that pinheaded, nut-scratching testament to the close relationship between Man and Ape, whom you-accepting your preordained second-class status without question-had the deplorable lack of judgment to marry. If you were lucky; perhaps you had no choice. In neither case do you deserve your pitiable fate.
The Web site doesn't offer much information about the book, aside from "Every Christian wife must, must, must read this," and the excerpt provided doesn't provide much illumination, either. Instead, true insight into the book's message is provided in vast, empty-headed quantity by its readers. The testimonials would be hilarious if they weren't so pathetic. I first encountered the site several days ago, yet I'm still horribly depressed thinking of how many human beings have been utterly destroyed, emotionally and spiritually, in the name of Bronze Age religious dogma. For instance:
I just wanted to write a note to let you know what a blessing your book has been. Months ago my mind was made up to file for a divorce. I was sure that I could live with out my husband and that my girls would be better off with out him for a father. His marijuana use, pornography addiction, pathological lying, and non-support of us had me convinced of it. I was in the process of filing the divorce papers, a couple days before that, my mother gave me “Created to be His Help Meet” and I began reading it. I decided that being a "Christian" woman it was worth while to at least try the Bible's way. I've tried every other way, even followed pastor's advice, my parent's advice, etc., etc., etc, all with the same end result: file for divorce. After reading your book I realized for the first time that God's way is for me to love, respect, honor, and OBEY, no matter what. I now realize that my husband may never change, but that's not what’s important...God wants me to change. For the first time in my 3 years of marriage, I have peace. -E.W.
What's worse, you are required not only to submit to this self-absorbed, philandering, mouth-breathing scuzzball's every whim, you have to do it with a smile:
I can't believe how free I am! I am free in Christ Jesus to walk after the Spirit, the flesh is dead and I am alive in Christ! Praise the Lord! Celebrating Christmas this year with my children with a smile that won't leave my face, serving my 'head' with renewed energy and joy. My husband doesn't notice; he doesn't even really know me (a busy, commanding, visionary that I am happy to help). But I am sure he is enjoying the benefits, all this help without complaint. What is to complain about? I am being led by the Spirit. I used to think "What about my needs?" "Don't I at least get to talk to you once in a while since you are my husband, instead of just taking orders?" "What about a little affection or romance?" But he just doesn't have the time. One night after a very exhausting day I was praying and realized this is God's will for my life: that I be a help meet to this man. But instead of feeling the burden of something I didn't want, I realized God knows best. This realization that to finish in me this work that He started, for me to do and be all He created me to be. I had to live this life and be "deprived" (that's the world talking) of a friendly romantic relationship with my husband. It may always be a master/servant kind of marriage, but Praise be to the Lord, because I don't care anymore. I am free and now when I tell my children to be happy, and when I say "OK" to my husband, "OK, baby, whatever you say. I love you," I am saying it with a happy face. -Laura
She evidently needs more for her "head" than yet another layer of delusions and intracranial lavage. I wonder how many of these "helpmeets" have gone completely nuts and rearranged their appointed Men of God's internal organs with a meat cleaver. Smiling all the while, of course-a gruesome, empty-eyed leer of tooth-clenching derangement broken only by insane cackling, as if someone had strapped Stimpy's Happy Helmet on an animated skull. I read stories like that in the news from time to time.
Funny how seldom Jesus is mentioned in the testimonials. No wussy, New Testament peacenik meek-will-inherit-the-earth philosophy for these all-American hunks of man-flesh!
A friend gave me the Help Meet Book to give to my wife and WOW. I think she read the book in a few days.... I can remember it like it was yesterday, I came home from work, walked through the front door and WHAMMO!!!! My wife looked different. She looked awakened. She greeted me with a big hug, a smile, and a kiss and she said "How was your Day?".... The house was immaculate. The dinner was superb. The laughter and conversation was super.... I will tell you one thing. God Made Man, Man was alone, God Made Woman so Man was not alone. A Help Meet. So, God knew Man needed HELP. So, through all the great things my wife does honoring God, I have straightened my priorities to be head over my wife in everything, from making more decisions, to standing up and becoming a MAN OF GOD. -Kevin
Now the author obviously isn't a Mormon, nor are her kooky fans. Only once or twice in Utah did I meet anyone who was brainwashed to such a disturbing extent. Yet the whole "Help Meet" mentality endures in Mormon doctrine, and certainly remains a fundamental tenet of the Mormon splinter groups living in southern Utah. According to doctrine, a woman cannot achieve salvation without a husband in the priesthood. Similarly, I've read that a Mormon woman's relationship with Jesus is through her husband. Doesn't that sound like a raw deal? There just ain't nothing less satisfying than secondhand Jesus. Seriously, hand-me-down Savior is even worse than used bathwater-even the kind that's all tepid, opaque and scummy. And it's not like there isn't enough Jesus to go around. God is infinite, right? We hardly have to worry about Peak Jesus or anything.
Oh, but wait-the gulf between Man and God is not as vast in Mormonism as it is in most Christian sects. (The mainstream press is all abuzz about Mitt Romney's daring exposé on his own religion, and the notion that we [men] can become gods by our own right has popped up several times that I've read.) God was once human, and if we remain ever obedient to the Church authorities in this life, we may earn passage to the Celestial Kingdom and become gods ourselves. Hence, having known human imperfection, God may not be omnipotent after all. So maybe Jesus, a mere stripling compared to God (the two are distinct in LDS doctrine), isn't as limitless a resource as mainstream Christianity would lead us to believe.
The funny thing is that the large majority of the Mormons I knew were fairly relaxed about gender roles: they'd feel as shocked by those "testimonies" as I was. Now if we can only get the Church leaders and Church doctrine on board with the notion of women's equality.
____________________
*She hasn't been my girlfriend since 1990, and anecdotal evidence suggests she's not even evil anymore; but like President of the United States, the title Evil Girlfiend is granted for life.