(no subject)
i still am here
to everyone that reads this and is curious about me and my whereabouts...
as of august 9th i have been going out with my BEAUTIFUL girlfriend alexa.
for anyone that knows her frome me must be my friend, and knows that i care about her alot.
in fact i love her.
now i kno what alot of you are gonna say;
i dont love her
im only 16 how can i be in love
we have only been going out for 4 months and some odd days
or for those of you that dont even care
alls i have to say to that is if its not love then i can say i never will be in love. i HONESTLY have never been happier with my self as a person.
thats not to sat that any of the other girls i have ever had a relationship with(weather for 2 seconds for 2 monthes) you kno who u are, wasnt good. i do not regret any of them but for whatever reason we had to go our seperate ways and i dont hate any of you. the girl i saw shreck 2 with two times but never really saw, willy-yum-yum, the girl who plays gameboy advanced SP,
the girl who wrote "everyone is duh" on my wall, the girl i made out with at that park, the girl i "made out with" just because behind the church,
i started going back to school at clintondale, what a mistake
i got my liscens and my mom gave/sold/lets me use her old car
i dont have a job but im looking,
i have a few peoplo in my life right now i would call friends: melissa jessica boo kyle kowalski
other then that everyone hates me
i dont actually "live" at alexas house but im there most nights
her house is great tho
i love her mom suzanne, shes one of the most AMAZING people i kno and i love talking to her.
sometimes we talk for hours about my life and shes a real good listener. she always helps me out
and tells it how it is.
since me and alexa have been going out i started reading and drawing and a little writing.
alls these things i thought were so stupid i now feel real strong about.
i think drawing is the best
i do some pretty deep things with just markers or a pen.
i found out also that books all arnt just about johnny and his dog and how they saved the world
and that the books we read in school are FUCKING BULLSHIT.
there are good books out there like "Junky" by william s burrows. its about his life and how hes addicted to heroin. its a work of art
alexas mom paints beautiful peices but i cant seem to get in the mood to paint.
i help suzanne around the house as much as i can
with her 2 dogs and 2 kids she has a handful and i feel good knowing i can lighten that burden.
AND alexas WHOLE family likes me, her aunts her cousins and her grandma
i do work for them if they need it for some extra cash
her grandma has a boyfriend maderd, hes a real good guy, he calls me willy.
me and alexas relationship is good, for the most part.
it could be better in some parts, but i wouldnt want it any other way.
ya we fight, we fight alot, buts its always over STUPID STUPID small shit.
and THATS because we are like 2 puzzle pieces that fit so good together we have to find stuff to fight about because stuff that normal couples fight about we dont even have to worry about.
im afraid im turing into a controlling boyfriend tho, not wanting her to wear certin clothes, not wanting her to go to partys,not wanting her to hang out with her friends, not wanting her to leave my side bassically.
but i swear on my life, on my GRANDPAS life that its just me being selfish.
i dont want her to wear some stuff because i dont want guys to look at her, because truthfully if someone did say something to her what the fuck is puney little old will gonna say or do. and it just makes me feel bad if i cant stick up for her.
MELISSA AND JESSICA
about the her hanging out with her friends.
I PROMISE its nothing against you guys
i love you guys alot, ask alexa. i always talk good about you. i do favors for you guys as much as i can and i stick up for you alot.
its not that i dont want her to hang out with YOU guys like with anyone else would be ok, its just when its just you guys, its not me. its not me with alexa, and i get jealous.
im not really sure if you can understand, buts i look at it like this
its not that its time for her to hang out with you guys
its that its just time were me and her are NOT together.
i hope you can understand that.
with all my heart i really do.
i love you guys.
and about the partys
well im sure any guy with a girlfriend can tell you, he never wants her to go to a party ESPICALLY with older guys, and EVEN MORE SO if they have been drinking.
its not that i dont trust her. i kno she would never do anything like that, its the GUSY i dont trust.
i have seen FIRST hand how guys that have been drinking treat girls, or even worse
how guys that havent been dringing treat girls that have.
and when she did go up to a party some guy put his arm around and i flipped out.
the reason i did that was because i just saw some guy putting his arm around my life and if he was maybe too drunk or kinda liked her a little TOO much just grabbing her and doing what he wants with her
and maybe she would of gotten raped or maybe i would be at her funeral the next week.
i just think if IM with her i can protect her.
and if i cant
ill die trying.
me and alexa have SO many memories together too.
you woudlnt even believe.
i kno alot of people think 4 monthes? what is he talking about
well this is how it is
for the last 4 months i have woke up next to the most beautiful girl i can imagine,
i probably spent a total of 20 nights at home since we met.
its wierd too because shes STill as hot as when i first noticed her at coney island.
now shes the girl ill never forget. we have so many times that are perminatly imbedded in our memories for all eternity. I FUCKING CRIED TO HER. ok
i dont cry
even when im sad but i can to her. this didnt just happen once either
she knows what they are
heres just SOME of them all
lansing ninny vic rockey balboa karl napoleon roof ms wensels spillway kowalski's hard rock nibbles baby wood coinstar "run da money" meijers down beaver lee good/bad
oh my lord there is a fucking million
we could never POSSIBLY break up
we both thought, key word thought we wanted to, but it never works we just sleep in the same bed and wake up and its like all our problems are gone, just like our dreams.
she probably thinks im a lunatic for the way i behave when im mad and i dont blame her. altho i throw little temper tantrums i would NEVER IN A MILLION years lay a hand on her, and if anyone did
i would fucking slit there throat.
we just had out christmas party for my moms family
that went well excetp at grace where my grampa cried because he said he missed billy (my uncle that died last year)
alexa has a brother and a sister who are both brilliant.
adam and me played halo 2 on his x box.
i did good for the frist time playing an x box.
adam used to not like me but now we are practicly friends
her sister is SOOOOOOO smart
she didnt believe me that there was sliced chicken but there is
one time her and alexa were fighting and she said something to alexa about me, but i deserved i,
i took away her little sister. i felt bad after that, really i did.
but what i really want is for her to like me
i think she is starting to
but i hope we become friends
i hung out with my older brother the other night
we got dinner
its so weird it was finally like me and him were hanging out, not he was watching me or had to bring me along.
my dads wishing i would make better choices in life and for once i agree with him.
my little brother is getting Girlfriends and talks to them on the phone in my room, maybe thats why the sheets are stuck together.
bottom line is i love everyone in my life.
i wouldnt change ONE thing if i could.
ok
thats all about my life that anyone on her cares to read that dosnt kno me.
this is the most if ever felt for anyone in my life
i love you alexa
to everyone that reads this and is curious about me and my whereabouts...
as of august 9th i have been going out with my BEAUTIFUL girlfriend alexa.
for anyone that knows her frome me must be my friend, and knows that i care about her alot.
in fact i love her.
now i kno what alot of you are gonna say;
i dont love her
im only 16 how can i be in love
we have only been going out for 4 months and some odd days
or for those of you that dont even care
alls i have to say to that is if its not love then i can say i never will be in love. i HONESTLY have never been happier with my self as a person.
thats not to sat that any of the other girls i have ever had a relationship with(weather for 2 seconds for 2 monthes) you kno who u are, wasnt good. i do not regret any of them but for whatever reason we had to go our seperate ways and i dont hate any of you. the girl i saw shreck 2 with two times but never really saw, willy-yum-yum, the girl who plays gameboy advanced SP,
the girl who wrote "everyone is duh" on my wall, the girl i made out with at that park, the girl i "made out with" just because behind the church,
i started going back to school at clintondale, what a mistake
i got my liscens and my mom gave/sold/lets me use her old car
i dont have a job but im looking,
i have a few peoplo in my life right now i would call friends: melissa jessica boo kyle kowalski
other then that everyone hates me
i dont actually "live" at alexas house but im there most nights
her house is great tho
i love her mom suzanne, shes one of the most AMAZING people i kno and i love talking to her.
sometimes we talk for hours about my life and shes a real good listener. she always helps me out
and tells it how it is.
since me and alexa have been going out i started reading and drawing and a little writing.
alls these things i thought were so stupid i now feel real strong about.
i think drawing is the best
i do some pretty deep things with just markers or a pen.
i found out also that books all arnt just about johnny and his dog and how they saved the world
and that the books we read in school are FUCKING BULLSHIT.
there are good books out there like "Junky" by william s burrows. its about his life and how hes addicted to heroin. its a work of art
alexas mom paints beautiful peices but i cant seem to get in the mood to paint.
i help suzanne around the house as much as i can
with her 2 dogs and 2 kids she has a handful and i feel good knowing i can lighten that burden.
AND alexas WHOLE family likes me, her aunts her cousins and her grandma
i do work for them if they need it for some extra cash
her grandma has a boyfriend maderd, hes a real good guy, he calls me willy.
me and alexas relationship is good, for the most part.
it could be better in some parts, but i wouldnt want it any other way.
ya we fight, we fight alot, buts its always over STUPID STUPID small shit.
and THATS because we are like 2 puzzle pieces that fit so good together we have to find stuff to fight about because stuff that normal couples fight about we dont even have to worry about.
im afraid im turing into a controlling boyfriend tho, not wanting her to wear certin clothes, not wanting her to go to partys,not wanting her to hang out with her friends, not wanting her to leave my side bassically.
but i swear on my life, on my GRANDPAS life that its just me being selfish.
i dont want her to wear some stuff because i dont want guys to look at her, because truthfully if someone did say something to her what the fuck is puney little old will gonna say or do. and it just makes me feel bad if i cant stick up for her.
MELISSA AND JESSICA
about the her hanging out with her friends.
I PROMISE its nothing against you guys
i love you guys alot, ask alexa. i always talk good about you. i do favors for you guys as much as i can and i stick up for you alot.
its not that i dont want her to hang out with YOU guys like with anyone else would be ok, its just when its just you guys, its not me. its not me with alexa, and i get jealous.
im not really sure if you can understand, buts i look at it like this
its not that its time for her to hang out with you guys
its that its just time were me and her are NOT together.
i hope you can understand that.
with all my heart i really do.
i love you guys.
and about the partys
well im sure any guy with a girlfriend can tell you, he never wants her to go to a party ESPICALLY with older guys, and EVEN MORE SO if they have been drinking.
its not that i dont trust her. i kno she would never do anything like that, its the GUSY i dont trust.
i have seen FIRST hand how guys that have been drinking treat girls, or even worse
how guys that havent been dringing treat girls that have.
and when she did go up to a party some guy put his arm around and i flipped out.
the reason i did that was because i just saw some guy putting his arm around my life and if he was maybe too drunk or kinda liked her a little TOO much just grabbing her and doing what he wants with her
and maybe she would of gotten raped or maybe i would be at her funeral the next week.
i just think if IM with her i can protect her.
and if i cant
ill die trying.
me and alexa have SO many memories together too.
you woudlnt even believe.
i kno alot of people think 4 monthes? what is he talking about
well this is how it is
for the last 4 months i have woke up next to the most beautiful girl i can imagine,
i probably spent a total of 20 nights at home since we met.
its wierd too because shes STill as hot as when i first noticed her at coney island.
now shes the girl ill never forget. we have so many times that are perminatly imbedded in our memories for all eternity. I FUCKING CRIED TO HER. ok
i dont cry
even when im sad but i can to her. this didnt just happen once either
she knows what they are
heres just SOME of them all
lansing ninny vic rockey balboa karl napoleon roof ms wensels spillway kowalski's hard rock nibbles baby wood coinstar "run da money" meijers down beaver lee good/bad
oh my lord there is a fucking million
we could never POSSIBLY break up
we both thought, key word thought we wanted to, but it never works we just sleep in the same bed and wake up and its like all our problems are gone, just like our dreams.
she probably thinks im a lunatic for the way i behave when im mad and i dont blame her. altho i throw little temper tantrums i would NEVER IN A MILLION years lay a hand on her, and if anyone did
i would fucking slit there throat.
we just had out christmas party for my moms family
that went well excetp at grace where my grampa cried because he said he missed billy (my uncle that died last year)
alexa has a brother and a sister who are both brilliant.
adam and me played halo 2 on his x box.
i did good for the frist time playing an x box.
adam used to not like me but now we are practicly friends
her sister is SOOOOOOO smart
she didnt believe me that there was sliced chicken but there is
one time her and alexa were fighting and she said something to alexa about me, but i deserved i,
i took away her little sister. i felt bad after that, really i did.
but what i really want is for her to like me
i think she is starting to
but i hope we become friends
i hung out with my older brother the other night
we got dinner
its so weird it was finally like me and him were hanging out, not he was watching me or had to bring me along.
my dads wishing i would make better choices in life and for once i agree with him.
my little brother is getting Girlfriends and talks to them on the phone in my room, maybe thats why the sheets are stuck together.
bottom line is i love everyone in my life.
i wouldnt change ONE thing if i could.
ok
thats all about my life that anyone on her cares to read that dosnt kno me.
this is the most if ever felt for anyone in my life
i love you alexa