059. Calendar
Title: Calendar
Number: 059
Completed: 4
Rating: PG
Genre: Angst
059. Calendar Eeteuk/Eeteuk
He tries hard.
He always has…
But sometimes…Just sometimes….He wonders if it’s really worth it...
The dark cloud of depression hung over him as he stared out into the rainy night sky, with the stars still twinkling brightly down at him; making him envy the freedom they had.
He wanted to fly away from his problems, from everything he couldn’t do, from the life he had wanted but knew noting about….But…The schedules and appointments and things he was supposed to do; all the things marked down on his calendar in blood red ink, kept him here.
Kept him in his cold and lonely iron walled cage.
Kept him from the freedom he now stared wistfully after.
He longed for it.
He longed for a life where he didn’t have to smile a smile that now seemed so fake he could barely stand it. Where he didn’t have to hide the tears that always seemed to find their way down his face no matter what he did to prevent them. He longed for a life that wasn’t stalked by cameras. Where he had the privacy to do what he pleased and not have to worry about what others would think, or what it would to the rest of the group. It sounded selfish, but he couldn’t help it! It was hard to always be strong for everyone else!
He always said he was the angel without wings…
But really if he’d had wings he knew that by now they’d be long since broken and tarnished.
He sighed and moved to his cold, empty bed and drifted off to sleep as his tears soaked his pillow.
That night he dreamed.
He dreamed that he was standing on a ledge; a ledge surrounded by a desolate emptiness. Curiously, though there was nothing in his bleak surroundings, there was a breeze floating through the air.
He started when he felt something on his back rustle, with a jolt he turned to see what it was but could see nothing but a flash of sparkling, glowing white that vanished when he came to a standstill.
Once more he turned, slowly this time, trying to catch another glimpse of what had floated in his peripheral vision. Once again he missed it.
This time he tried something different; he glanced over his shoulder, slowly turning his head till he could see what lay on his back.
Wings…
A pair of white, sparkling, and slightly glowing wings.
Amazed he reached a hand back to touch them; they were as soft as the looked, and they weren’t from his imagination.
A smile lit up his face, the first true one to show in a very long time, dimples appeared and the smile could blind the sun with the joy it held in its depths.
And suddenly, his surroundings don’t seam to be as bleak and lonely as they were before; all he can feel is elation and joy as he jumped off the edge into the open sky, without looking back at his wings.
He’s flying! The wind rushing past his face the feeling of gliding through the air without a care…
But then he’s falling…
Slowly at first, then gaining momentum; the air rushing past him harshly now, pressing against him in an attempt to force the air from his lungs and bring tears to his eyes.
But there are no tears…
There is only acceptance.
Acceptance of his fate.
Acceptance of the fact that it was too good to be true; especially for him…
He looks back over his shoulder to find that his once spectacularly glittering and glowing white wings were now tattered and torn, broken and weak…
The ground was within his sights now. Coming closer and closer as the seconds passed him by, and a last thought passed through his mind before the void consumed him and everything ceased to exist…
Stupid boy…You should know better…Stupid boy…You should know by now, you can’t fly on broken wings…
~*~*~*~*~*~
This just in: Super Junior’s leader, Eeteuk who had gone missing late last night has just been found and declared dead…
Super Junior’s leader, Eeteuk has just been found and declared dead…
Eeteuk…
Declared dead…
A plate crashing could be heard over the radio announcement followed by the sound of a body hitting the floor and then strangled sobs that kept up for hours.
~ Don’t blame me too much… ~
Number: 059
Completed: 4
Rating: PG
Genre: Angst
059. Calendar Eeteuk/Eeteuk
He tries hard.
He always has…
But sometimes…Just sometimes….He wonders if it’s really worth it...
The dark cloud of depression hung over him as he stared out into the rainy night sky, with the stars still twinkling brightly down at him; making him envy the freedom they had.
He wanted to fly away from his problems, from everything he couldn’t do, from the life he had wanted but knew noting about….But…The schedules and appointments and things he was supposed to do; all the things marked down on his calendar in blood red ink, kept him here.
Kept him in his cold and lonely iron walled cage.
Kept him from the freedom he now stared wistfully after.
He longed for it.
He longed for a life where he didn’t have to smile a smile that now seemed so fake he could barely stand it. Where he didn’t have to hide the tears that always seemed to find their way down his face no matter what he did to prevent them. He longed for a life that wasn’t stalked by cameras. Where he had the privacy to do what he pleased and not have to worry about what others would think, or what it would to the rest of the group. It sounded selfish, but he couldn’t help it! It was hard to always be strong for everyone else!
He always said he was the angel without wings…
But really if he’d had wings he knew that by now they’d be long since broken and tarnished.
He sighed and moved to his cold, empty bed and drifted off to sleep as his tears soaked his pillow.
That night he dreamed.
He dreamed that he was standing on a ledge; a ledge surrounded by a desolate emptiness. Curiously, though there was nothing in his bleak surroundings, there was a breeze floating through the air.
He started when he felt something on his back rustle, with a jolt he turned to see what it was but could see nothing but a flash of sparkling, glowing white that vanished when he came to a standstill.
Once more he turned, slowly this time, trying to catch another glimpse of what had floated in his peripheral vision. Once again he missed it.
This time he tried something different; he glanced over his shoulder, slowly turning his head till he could see what lay on his back.
Wings…
A pair of white, sparkling, and slightly glowing wings.
Amazed he reached a hand back to touch them; they were as soft as the looked, and they weren’t from his imagination.
A smile lit up his face, the first true one to show in a very long time, dimples appeared and the smile could blind the sun with the joy it held in its depths.
And suddenly, his surroundings don’t seam to be as bleak and lonely as they were before; all he can feel is elation and joy as he jumped off the edge into the open sky, without looking back at his wings.
He’s flying! The wind rushing past his face the feeling of gliding through the air without a care…
But then he’s falling…
Slowly at first, then gaining momentum; the air rushing past him harshly now, pressing against him in an attempt to force the air from his lungs and bring tears to his eyes.
But there are no tears…
There is only acceptance.
Acceptance of his fate.
Acceptance of the fact that it was too good to be true; especially for him…
He looks back over his shoulder to find that his once spectacularly glittering and glowing white wings were now tattered and torn, broken and weak…
The ground was within his sights now. Coming closer and closer as the seconds passed him by, and a last thought passed through his mind before the void consumed him and everything ceased to exist…
Stupid boy…You should know better…Stupid boy…You should know by now, you can’t fly on broken wings…
~*~*~*~*~*~
This just in: Super Junior’s leader, Eeteuk who had gone missing late last night has just been found and declared dead…
Super Junior’s leader, Eeteuk has just been found and declared dead…
Eeteuk…
Declared dead…
A plate crashing could be heard over the radio announcement followed by the sound of a body hitting the floor and then strangled sobs that kept up for hours.
~ Don’t blame me too much… ~