Don't read this it isn't important.
yea, well i just felt like randomly posting shit, cuz i just don't care, So all me and Autumn do now is argue, who knows how long this "friendship" is gonna last with all this shit.
blargh, i have pictures of her all over my 'puter and i dunno if i should keep them or what?
i mean... i see them and i think of all the GOOD times that there were, it makes me wonder what the fuck happened then i just get mad, cuz everything ended so reterded....ly... or something... so yea whatever happens happens
im perfectly fine now i guess, i have no intentions of getting back with her, i would have to be an idiot to try that again... oh well i guess i just gain expirience and knowledge from being .... in this drama
umm my crush for julia is still pretty strong, and my crush on sierra is .... well there i guess, especially after last night... i don't know what to do, it's not like it made things weird or anything, but it makes me think of why i would get with her if i did, i don't want it to just be a sexual attraction she deserves better, haha
NEO is helarious he hates the fact that i still want to talk to autumn, its toooooo funny, like the other day when i was writing the letters back and forth he kept throwing shit at me telling me to just cut it off and leave her alone....
it makes me wonder what the right thing to do would be indeed, but im just gonna go with instincts, and if we end up fighting too much or if she keeps saying im being "weird" i think thats just code for "GAY" lmao
then it won't be worth it, she says im important to her, but i dunno, i dont think im any kinds of important to anybody excpet to MAYBE my family, if i could move away to the furthest part of the earth where nobody knew me and i could just live there i would, just until i got to know ppl there then i'd have to leave again hahaha
i don't know if its me that gets tired of ppl , or if im just fxxk in the head
i want to listen to X-JAPAN but my DL software i use is FUBAR so i haven't DL a song in months... not to mention my ADOBE PREMIER is crapped out on me again, which is sad cuz it'd be awesom to make at least one more video to enter to the NDK AMV contest,
i remember showing autumn my AMV"s and she was all like "ow , your so good at that sweety" and she used to tell me that my drawings made her feel so good cuz she really liekd them , it made me feel like i could do anything, gawd im such a loser , its so hard to be modest sometimes... althought i do hate some of my drawings... but i really do love getting my ego stroked which is prolly what gets on ppl's nerves...
but i think that i have the right to hate myself and what i do, i mean its me....
kinda like on "The ONE" with jet li where he says... "how can i kill myself 218 times and be considered "MURDER"?"
yea if you haven't seen the movie then go see it
cuz ur missing out its a great movie
speaking of movies... i need to watch pulp fiction FINALLY, i started watching it last nnihgt but i fell asleep, i had work this morning so i had to get sleep, but it was really funny from what i saw so far... hmm, im going to go play some bloodrayne2 now.
YUP YUP YUP YUP i love having a journal, its kinda releasing and fun, it leets me take up some time...
oki-doki... blargh
........ i want some jello
blargh, i have pictures of her all over my 'puter and i dunno if i should keep them or what?
i mean... i see them and i think of all the GOOD times that there were, it makes me wonder what the fuck happened then i just get mad, cuz everything ended so reterded....ly... or something... so yea whatever happens happens
im perfectly fine now i guess, i have no intentions of getting back with her, i would have to be an idiot to try that again... oh well i guess i just gain expirience and knowledge from being .... in this drama
umm my crush for julia is still pretty strong, and my crush on sierra is .... well there i guess, especially after last night... i don't know what to do, it's not like it made things weird or anything, but it makes me think of why i would get with her if i did, i don't want it to just be a sexual attraction she deserves better, haha
NEO is helarious he hates the fact that i still want to talk to autumn, its toooooo funny, like the other day when i was writing the letters back and forth he kept throwing shit at me telling me to just cut it off and leave her alone....
it makes me wonder what the right thing to do would be indeed, but im just gonna go with instincts, and if we end up fighting too much or if she keeps saying im being "weird" i think thats just code for "GAY" lmao
then it won't be worth it, she says im important to her, but i dunno, i dont think im any kinds of important to anybody excpet to MAYBE my family, if i could move away to the furthest part of the earth where nobody knew me and i could just live there i would, just until i got to know ppl there then i'd have to leave again hahaha
i don't know if its me that gets tired of ppl , or if im just fxxk in the head
i want to listen to X-JAPAN but my DL software i use is FUBAR so i haven't DL a song in months... not to mention my ADOBE PREMIER is crapped out on me again, which is sad cuz it'd be awesom to make at least one more video to enter to the NDK AMV contest,
i remember showing autumn my AMV"s and she was all like "ow , your so good at that sweety" and she used to tell me that my drawings made her feel so good cuz she really liekd them , it made me feel like i could do anything, gawd im such a loser , its so hard to be modest sometimes... althought i do hate some of my drawings... but i really do love getting my ego stroked which is prolly what gets on ppl's nerves...
but i think that i have the right to hate myself and what i do, i mean its me....
kinda like on "The ONE" with jet li where he says... "how can i kill myself 218 times and be considered "MURDER"?"
yea if you haven't seen the movie then go see it
cuz ur missing out its a great movie
speaking of movies... i need to watch pulp fiction FINALLY, i started watching it last nnihgt but i fell asleep, i had work this morning so i had to get sleep, but it was really funny from what i saw so far... hmm, im going to go play some bloodrayne2 now.
YUP YUP YUP YUP i love having a journal, its kinda releasing and fun, it leets me take up some time...
oki-doki... blargh
........ i want some jello