Jul 01, 2005 01:35
I've decided the most underappreciated part of Phantom of the Opera is Wandering Child. But only in the original version, the 3 part version. In the modern duet version, it can go right on being underappreciated because it's nothing special. The original cast recording though... it's awesome. I still wish I could play the Phantom. I still know, rationally that that's never ever going to happen. I still dream about it anyway.
I got the first season of the Pretender on DVD for my birthday. Also the 3rd season of ER. I had forgotten how much I used to love Pretender. My mom didn't want me watching it, it was back at the way beginning of those TV ratings things in the corner of the screen...and half the time it was rated TVPG, which was fine, but once she saw it was TV14 and didn't really want me to watch it anymore. (I would have been.... 12?.. no, 13, at the time.) Watching it now, it's a little cheesy. You have to suspend some disbelief, I mean, you have to believe that this guy really is a supergenius who can be pretty much anything at all. That's easy enough, I've liked shows with flimsier premises. It's Miss Parker that makes me groan/laugh. She's just about the cheesiest, most cardboard-like character there. (Although she has teasing moments of actually being a character, which is crazy.) Granted, yeah, the show's a little formulaic, but I kind of like that, it's comforting in a way. It's really nice to revisit something I had loved but had all but forgotten about for years. I certainly never taped it - my Pretender-watching days were before my TV-taping days. Just barely... I think I started recording Diagnosis Murder the year or so after.
Allow me to digress for a moment to say, I WANT THAT ON DVD. It's no longer my favorite favorite show, but when I'm feeling down, when I'm feeling... young isn't the right word for that feeling... Like if I'm sick, that feeling where you wish you were a kid so your parents would take care of you? It's a good show for that. It was my show when I was a preteen/teen. All I have is grainy off-the-TV VHS recordings, many from PAX, which I hardly get in, here, so they're pretty bad. The ones from CBS are getting old, so they're degrading. I want it on DVD... they've put much dumber stuff out on DVD. I can't see why they won't do this one!
When House comes out on DVD, I'm getting that, too. Random thought.
I bought 2 more Underworks Double Front Compression Shirts today. I wanted to get them now, so that I can alter them when my parents go away in a couple weeks. (I need unobserved sewing machine time.) I wore my current one to work the other day, and no one said anything. It didn't make my day totally better, but it did make me feel a little better about myself for a while, to be bound. (Even though, as a sort of interim 'please don't say anything or notice I'm different' stage, I didn't tuck myself properly so I wasn't as flat as I could have been.) At least it staved off the "I just want to die" thoughts for an hour or so while I was high on the "I'm really doing something crazy, but good" thing.
Still need to actually work on my costume for the big Harry Potter debut. God, that's going to be a CRAZY night. Not sure I can handle it, but I'm not really being given a choice.
Not getting along so well with my therapist. I think he's full of shit. But I don't know what else to do, at the moment. I just don't think I should feel like killing myself every time I leave there. And yet I do.
costuming,
musicals,
transition,
television,
depression,
passing,
therapy