JOY...UNSPEAKABLE JOY
So I can sleep peacefully tonight because well for the first time in a long time I feel liberated...I feel like I can breathe...I feel at least for the moment like a human being again with a whole heart and not some jagged piece of obsidian. I feel loved or at least I feel released from whatever this weight is that has been on me....I am literally so overjoyed that I cried happy tears....can you believe it??? Happy tears??? That is normally not even in my vocabulary....I just feel wonderful....it's strange how my moods change so quickly but I am hoping this feeling lasts....I am the only one who can make this happen...I am taking that approach in hopes that the rest of my future will not be fucked up...I am proud of myself, this is a big accomplishment for me....I am actually feeling again...and not just sadness like normally, but a mixture of everything...It feels like a dam has burst inside me and all this emotion just came roaring out and it has been pent up...
I have hurt myself a lot lately....I'm sick of it...no more can I do that....I have to be a man and stop being such a pussy all the time...
It's hard to bury yourself....or yourself as you have known you for so long....I definitely at the end of this all will hold a funeral service.
Well time for bed...I can't believe this feeling...overjoyed
♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥'s
Adam
I have hurt myself a lot lately....I'm sick of it...no more can I do that....I have to be a man and stop being such a pussy all the time...
It's hard to bury yourself....or yourself as you have known you for so long....I definitely at the end of this all will hold a funeral service.
Well time for bed...I can't believe this feeling...overjoyed
♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥'s
Adam