Darian...

[4new_beginnings]

That name has not passed these lips in four years...four years. Last night after I went to bed I got a message from him asking if he would get a reply back or if I still hated him. I don't hate him. I'm sad...sad because of four wasted years when we used to be so close. Four years of not having heard from him or anyone else. I heard his G-Ma died. I'm sorry about that. She was a nice woman.

It was just so weird. He got on his afternoon/evening and I messaged him. He said he was surprised because he hadn't expected a reply back. He thought I would still hate him...though honestly there's not really a lot of room in my life for hate. I've been happily married three months to the man of my dreams, I've got good friends and my 'kids'. I'm not sure when I stopped hating him, if it was a sudden thing or a gradual thing. All I know is I don't hate him anymore.

I thanked him for having insight where I did not to know we would not last. He said we were a good couple but just had too many differences. That surprised me...and touched me. A part of me will always love him simply because of how much time we spent together as a couple and as friends. Off and on for years.

It just really surprised me...who knows what will happen now?