the day after thanksgiving 2009
not sure who said this but i remember the quote well ~ "Life happens while you're busy making other plans." funny how certain things stay stuck in my mind, somehow surfacing at just the right time, there's a mystery i may never understand but i consider it a gift in its own, strangeish way.
bruce didn't tell me on turkey day, but he had been to the doctor earlier in the week because of abdominal pain. the doc had started him on antibiotics since his white cell count was elevated in his blood. well, knowing or not, i knew something was wrong because on tuesday, the very day he went to the doctor, i was as sick as a dog. yep, the whole thing - nausea, total stomach upset, Imodium, u name it i felt it. and no, I WASN'T PREGNANT, so cut that crap out now! odd thing was how quickly it came on, late monday night and through the night into tuesday, despite my home remedies it wouldn't quit. then wednesday i felt better, but had a poor appetite, even on thanksgiving day.
the day after that i get a call from bruce telling me he is on his way to the emergency room, i damn near fainted... he told me he had been to the doc and was getting worse, and, get this, was DRIVING HIMSELF to t he hospital from work (okay, lunacy runs in the genes, calm down cluckies!).
hours later i was still there with him, his pain so bad they actually gave him dilaudid via iv line, finally he slept for a little bit, but i was dragging. he was admitted and i got home around 2 in the morning, wiped out and worried sick. basically from that day on it was literally one thing after another. turns out he had abscesses in his intestines that were infected, if not ready to rupture, and needed surgery. the antibiotics went up triple dose for a few days to kick the infection down a notch, then on december 1st he had his first of 3 major abdominal surgeries.
complications, ongoing problems, 11 inches of intestine removed in a second surgery, complete with a temporary ostomy, the poor guy had lost almost 20 pounds in a month. then a MRSA infection, adhesive reactions to tape, ostomy appliances, in and out of hospitals, more issues trying to get an appliance that would work, finally to the point where he had 2nd degree burns on his abdomen around the stoma... and me there, initially every day, then every other, usually daily visits when he was here in orange county. wiped out, dear God, doesn't describe it. coordinating home care, wound care, handling bills, you name it, i became his leg to stand on, and i would do it again, i love him that much.
some people would say i'm nuts, too devoted, but i can't be any other way. i am that way not only with my family, but anyone i love, some say i am pathetic, a dog that comes back for more even after being kicked. despite the problems over all the years somehow i can still love, family, friends, even when i have been hurt badly. not everyone is that resilient, i know this, and i am not a superwoman, trust me, i don't have a cape, magic lasso or invisible jet. i have paid dearly on many levels, as we all do. we can all criticize one another, dig up the old dirt or pull a low blow, but it doesn't change the endless space in my heart to love. as i get older i marvel at it more because i don't know how this happened to me, maybe it is yet another mystery.
to be continued...
bruce didn't tell me on turkey day, but he had been to the doctor earlier in the week because of abdominal pain. the doc had started him on antibiotics since his white cell count was elevated in his blood. well, knowing or not, i knew something was wrong because on tuesday, the very day he went to the doctor, i was as sick as a dog. yep, the whole thing - nausea, total stomach upset, Imodium, u name it i felt it. and no, I WASN'T PREGNANT, so cut that crap out now! odd thing was how quickly it came on, late monday night and through the night into tuesday, despite my home remedies it wouldn't quit. then wednesday i felt better, but had a poor appetite, even on thanksgiving day.
the day after that i get a call from bruce telling me he is on his way to the emergency room, i damn near fainted... he told me he had been to the doc and was getting worse, and, get this, was DRIVING HIMSELF to t he hospital from work (okay, lunacy runs in the genes, calm down cluckies!).
hours later i was still there with him, his pain so bad they actually gave him dilaudid via iv line, finally he slept for a little bit, but i was dragging. he was admitted and i got home around 2 in the morning, wiped out and worried sick. basically from that day on it was literally one thing after another. turns out he had abscesses in his intestines that were infected, if not ready to rupture, and needed surgery. the antibiotics went up triple dose for a few days to kick the infection down a notch, then on december 1st he had his first of 3 major abdominal surgeries.
complications, ongoing problems, 11 inches of intestine removed in a second surgery, complete with a temporary ostomy, the poor guy had lost almost 20 pounds in a month. then a MRSA infection, adhesive reactions to tape, ostomy appliances, in and out of hospitals, more issues trying to get an appliance that would work, finally to the point where he had 2nd degree burns on his abdomen around the stoma... and me there, initially every day, then every other, usually daily visits when he was here in orange county. wiped out, dear God, doesn't describe it. coordinating home care, wound care, handling bills, you name it, i became his leg to stand on, and i would do it again, i love him that much.
some people would say i'm nuts, too devoted, but i can't be any other way. i am that way not only with my family, but anyone i love, some say i am pathetic, a dog that comes back for more even after being kicked. despite the problems over all the years somehow i can still love, family, friends, even when i have been hurt badly. not everyone is that resilient, i know this, and i am not a superwoman, trust me, i don't have a cape, magic lasso or invisible jet. i have paid dearly on many levels, as we all do. we can all criticize one another, dig up the old dirt or pull a low blow, but it doesn't change the endless space in my heart to love. as i get older i marvel at it more because i don't know how this happened to me, maybe it is yet another mystery.
to be continued...