Entry 15

[41810]

[J isn't a nearly violent enough patient to get tied down or straight-jacketed or anything, but he does have himself a nice, white, padded room, where he's sitting in the far corner, curled up in a ball, in his trusty sweatpants and white t-shirt. He's leaning back against the corner of the wall, his arms down between his legs, fingers curling

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[seesyou]

If the hand is familiar, it is only in the way it moves, fingers first after the soft click of the latch, curling delicately around the edge of the door, but not so long and not so scrubbed lineless. The snow-blind white is now just pale, marked with the usual seams and creases, tipped with fingernails. Then the wrist with a crisp white cuff, then the black of the suit-coat, then another white cuff from the white coat over top of that.

He slides in sidelong, a tall man, as bald as if he never had any hair at all. His mouth is a thin, dark line, and his eyes are pale and remote, focused on the wall just behind J rather than on the boy himself. Across his face, there are two thin scars, joining on the bridge of his nose in a barely-visible x.

His sympathetic smile is a stiff twitch at the corners of his mouth, drawing lines down from the corners of his nose but otherwise touching the rest of his face not at all.

"I heard that you had a small accident earlier today, J."

His voice falls dead on the air like sound after a heavy

[41810]

J splutters when he sees the hand, still sobbing softly from Diogenes' attack, his arms covered in and dripping with blood, the scabs torn open in an attempt to feel real. When Dr. Oliver walks in, stiffly, J coughs on his noises and goes almost unrealistically silent, though his frame still shakes now and again with a soft sob catching in his throat.

"I-I... wh-why are you here? please don't take me away. Alone, alone..."

[seesyou]

"I received a report that you became violent with another doctor. We will be moving to another ward now, J."

For a moment, the distant eyes focus, and it becomes clear that the chilly, faraway gaze is much preferable to being stared through by Dr. Olivier.

"You are bleeding."

[41810]

"O-oh, God," he whispers, uneasily looking away from the gaze uneasily and shifting further into the wall behind him, scratching at his arms subconsciously. "This is worse, this is so much worse. P-please don't take me. Please don't take me away." Then, his voice breaks, and he gives out a soft little sob. "B- Bleed more, bleed more... Found me, found me forever, n-never going to... oh, God, never going t-to let me go..."

[seesyou]

"Put your hands down."

The tone of command is unmistakable even in that softly muffled voice, even without the static screen or the signal beep or the scroll of binary.

"You were given a chance. Many chances. I am finished with waiting."

[41810]

Automatically he freezes, and then his hands just drop, uselessly and gore-streaked, by his sides. "H-he was- he was being-" J starts, whimpering, his head unable to focus on words while Dr. Oliver- no, the Operator, the fucking Operator -is standing there. "He... He was attacking me, goading me, he told me you'd come for me, he told me you'd come and take me and there'd be nothing left but silence and static and he threw me against the wall..."

[seesyou]

"Why should that alarm you?" Another distant parody of a smile, showing a glimmer of teeth no more than a shade whiter than his dry, pale lips. "I come for you frequently."

[41810]

Oh, that was the right thing to say. J shudders with a low sob and curls into a ball, scratching at his arms and trying to force the static in his head away. He knows this is the Operator - he knows it. He can feel it. His skin is crawling. His head is going numb.

"Leave me alone," he says loudly, his voice clear for once. "Leave me alone."

[seesyou]

"What is it that you want?" He tilts his head far over, not too far, but far enough. "Peace? Privacy? An opportunity to keep your thoughts your own? I would love to give you all these things, but you insist upon making our acquaintance difficult."

[41810]

Uneasily, shaking, J struggles to stand, snarling at the Operat- er, doctor. "I said leave me alone," he whispers harshly, glaring. "I never wanted this. I just wanted to find Alex." Unsteadily, he takes a step forward, and then another, gaining more sure footing. "I'll fight you. I'll always fight you."

[seesyou]

Olivier looms, smiles a tiny, frozen smile.

"How?"

[41810]

"Any way I can," J snarls, and launches his scrawny, bloody form at the Operator with a feral scream.

[seesyou]

Somehow, he wasn't expecting that. Thrown off balance, he staggers backward, nearly falling. He catches himself, barely, and gropes for whatever is nearest: J's head and hair and scalp. His nails are short, but sharp, and he digs as deep as he can.

There's a faint sound drowned in all the scuffling, but after a moment it becomes clear that it's Olivier: he is hissing between his teeth, a soft, furious sound that seems to come from somewhere deeper than his mouth.

[41810]

Oh, God. That hurts. J lets out a loud, feral howl of pain and misery, and then there's that godforsaken static, that noise that seems to penetrate his very being and swamp him with... with...

He goes limp, his eyes going dead, and he moans, a low, hurt, scared sound, under his breath. Bye bye, J. Hello, sort-of-masked-man.

[seesyou]

"Much better." The claws release his scalp. "You see how much easier it is this way?" He gathers J's wrists in one long-fingered hand and twists them neatly behind his back, groping with the other hand for whatever restraints are easiest to come by.

"I am sure the move will be temporary. There is an empty room beside Timothy's that will suit you very well."

[41810]

His body crumples as the dOptorator drops him, and he falls to his knees, staring, dead-eyed, ahead, not really looking. He doesn't move beyond how Oliver moves him, swaying slightly but held up by his wrists.