Fandoms 3 and 4
I have been very strict with myself about the fandom pairings that pop out of my generator (some of the things generated are single Fandom because I inserted a number of *blanks*) - however, there have certainly been a few where I've looked at the combination and gone "How the hell am I meant to write that".
Fandom: Stardew Valley/Women’s Murder Club
Rating: PG
Word Count: 374
“You could look a little less suspicious Lindsay”, Claire chastised as Lindsay watched the villagers go about their daily work, “We’re supposed to be on vacation”.
“Beaches are vacations, cabins in the mountains, hell - even fancy suites in big cities...this...this is the beginning of an eighties horror movie”, Lindsay wished she hadn’t agreed to leave her gun and badge locked in the safe back at the lodge.
“This is rural life”, Cindy was already stretched out on the grass, warming herself under the midday sun, “You’re just too cynical”.
Lindsay glanced at Jill, certain she would get some support from her friend. The blonde-haired lawyer’s idea of a rural vacation generally involved working plug sockets for her hair straighteners and access to the internet. Instead, Jill just smiled sheepishly,
“You’ve got to admit, it’s kind of quaint”, Jill shrugged and Lindsay threw her hands up in defeat,
“Fine, fine. I can see I’m out-numbered”, she sighed, “I’m going for a walk, don’t blame me if the Children of the Corn get you while I’m gone”. She heard their chuckles behind her as her long legs took her up the hill towards the mountainside.
As she neared the top of the hill, she could feel eyes on her. She glanced around and startled at the sight of a man with a shock of grey hair and bushy beard staring at her from behind a tree. Was he wearing a potato sack? As soon as she made eye-contact with him he crept away.
“Don’t you worry about old Linus there”, a voice made her spin around again, her hand automatically going to her hip and grasping at nothing, “He looks a bit scary but he’s harmless - are you the new farmer then?”. Lindsay looked herself up and down, then back at the red-head in front of her.
Biting the urge to ask the woman whether she looked like a farmer, Lindsay shook her head, “No. I’m just here on vacation”.
“Shame - we’re meant to have a new farmer join us soon”, the woman sighed, “Guess we’ll just keep on waiting”, and without saying anything else, the woman carried on her walk. Lindsay rolled her eyes skyward for a moment,
“Yep, definitely going to be murdered”
Fandom: Left 4 Dead/Plants vs Zombies
Rating: PG-12
Word Count: 480
“You’re an idiot”, Bill slammed the door to the safehouse shut and turned on Francis who - as always - looks nonchalant about the whole business.
“Hey, no-one else was throwing out ideas”, Francis shrugged, “Figured things couldn’t get much worse”.
“Much worse?”, Louis was pacing at the back of the room, staring in bewilderment at the item in his hand, “You gave away our guns!”
“They were pretty much out of ammo - we got the better deal here”, Francis began opening drawers, checking them for items, “You want some pills?”. Louis didn’t answer but Francis chucked them to him anyway with a deep chuckle.
“Guns with a few bullets are still much more useful that fucking plant seeds”, Bill threw the packs of seeds at Francis and they bounced harmlessly off his chest.
“We’re going to die”, Louis was groaning to himself.
“The guy said they kill zombies”, Francis picked up the packets one by one, turning them over to read the instructions.
“He also told us his name was Crazy Dave”, Bill’s voice was getting lower as he stalked closer, and Francis began to wonder if the older man was about to snap and start strangling him, “Why would you believe anything someone called Crazy Dave told you?”
“Guys?”, Zoe’s voice emerged through the tension but Francis was too distracted by the imminent threat of harm.
“He didn’t seem that crazy, not considering some of the other people we’ve come across”, Francis began to back away, clutching his seed packets to his chest, “Besides - look at Jack and the Beanstalk - no-one believed him either”.
“I don’t think your fucking seeds are going to lead us to a golden chicken!”, Bill shoved a chair out of the way as he pursued Francis.
“The chicken wasn’t golden it just laid…”, but Louis clammed up as Bill shot him a dangerous look.
“Guys!”, Zoe’s voice was more insistent now and Francis diverted his attention,
“What….the fuck?”, Francis nearly dropped his packets of seeds when he saw what Zoe was trying to show them.
The little plant - although not so little as far as plants go - was up to Zoe’s thigh. It bobbed back and forth in the plant pot Zoe had found, it’s green face staring blankly at Francis.
“The hell is that?”, Bill demanded.
“I don’t know - but look what happens if I aim it at a zombie”, Zoe moved the plant pot to point it through the bars on the window. A gentle pop preceded the plant shooting mini, green cannonballs out of it’s mouth. The first knocked a nearby zombie clean off it’s feet, the second took off the arm of another.
“Well I’ll be damned”, Bill’s voice had faded away to little more than a whisper.
“And we didn’t even have to slay a giant to get them”, Francis beamed as he began to rummage for more plant pots.
Fandom: Stardew Valley/Women’s Murder Club
Rating: PG
Word Count: 374
“You could look a little less suspicious Lindsay”, Claire chastised as Lindsay watched the villagers go about their daily work, “We’re supposed to be on vacation”.
“Beaches are vacations, cabins in the mountains, hell - even fancy suites in big cities...this...this is the beginning of an eighties horror movie”, Lindsay wished she hadn’t agreed to leave her gun and badge locked in the safe back at the lodge.
“This is rural life”, Cindy was already stretched out on the grass, warming herself under the midday sun, “You’re just too cynical”.
Lindsay glanced at Jill, certain she would get some support from her friend. The blonde-haired lawyer’s idea of a rural vacation generally involved working plug sockets for her hair straighteners and access to the internet. Instead, Jill just smiled sheepishly,
“You’ve got to admit, it’s kind of quaint”, Jill shrugged and Lindsay threw her hands up in defeat,
“Fine, fine. I can see I’m out-numbered”, she sighed, “I’m going for a walk, don’t blame me if the Children of the Corn get you while I’m gone”. She heard their chuckles behind her as her long legs took her up the hill towards the mountainside.
As she neared the top of the hill, she could feel eyes on her. She glanced around and startled at the sight of a man with a shock of grey hair and bushy beard staring at her from behind a tree. Was he wearing a potato sack? As soon as she made eye-contact with him he crept away.
“Don’t you worry about old Linus there”, a voice made her spin around again, her hand automatically going to her hip and grasping at nothing, “He looks a bit scary but he’s harmless - are you the new farmer then?”. Lindsay looked herself up and down, then back at the red-head in front of her.
Biting the urge to ask the woman whether she looked like a farmer, Lindsay shook her head, “No. I’m just here on vacation”.
“Shame - we’re meant to have a new farmer join us soon”, the woman sighed, “Guess we’ll just keep on waiting”, and without saying anything else, the woman carried on her walk. Lindsay rolled her eyes skyward for a moment,
“Yep, definitely going to be murdered”
Fandom: Left 4 Dead/Plants vs Zombies
Rating: PG-12
Word Count: 480
“You’re an idiot”, Bill slammed the door to the safehouse shut and turned on Francis who - as always - looks nonchalant about the whole business.
“Hey, no-one else was throwing out ideas”, Francis shrugged, “Figured things couldn’t get much worse”.
“Much worse?”, Louis was pacing at the back of the room, staring in bewilderment at the item in his hand, “You gave away our guns!”
“They were pretty much out of ammo - we got the better deal here”, Francis began opening drawers, checking them for items, “You want some pills?”. Louis didn’t answer but Francis chucked them to him anyway with a deep chuckle.
“Guns with a few bullets are still much more useful that fucking plant seeds”, Bill threw the packs of seeds at Francis and they bounced harmlessly off his chest.
“We’re going to die”, Louis was groaning to himself.
“The guy said they kill zombies”, Francis picked up the packets one by one, turning them over to read the instructions.
“He also told us his name was Crazy Dave”, Bill’s voice was getting lower as he stalked closer, and Francis began to wonder if the older man was about to snap and start strangling him, “Why would you believe anything someone called Crazy Dave told you?”
“Guys?”, Zoe’s voice emerged through the tension but Francis was too distracted by the imminent threat of harm.
“He didn’t seem that crazy, not considering some of the other people we’ve come across”, Francis began to back away, clutching his seed packets to his chest, “Besides - look at Jack and the Beanstalk - no-one believed him either”.
“I don’t think your fucking seeds are going to lead us to a golden chicken!”, Bill shoved a chair out of the way as he pursued Francis.
“The chicken wasn’t golden it just laid…”, but Louis clammed up as Bill shot him a dangerous look.
“Guys!”, Zoe’s voice was more insistent now and Francis diverted his attention,
“What….the fuck?”, Francis nearly dropped his packets of seeds when he saw what Zoe was trying to show them.
The little plant - although not so little as far as plants go - was up to Zoe’s thigh. It bobbed back and forth in the plant pot Zoe had found, it’s green face staring blankly at Francis.
“The hell is that?”, Bill demanded.
“I don’t know - but look what happens if I aim it at a zombie”, Zoe moved the plant pot to point it through the bars on the window. A gentle pop preceded the plant shooting mini, green cannonballs out of it’s mouth. The first knocked a nearby zombie clean off it’s feet, the second took off the arm of another.
“Well I’ll be damned”, Bill’s voice had faded away to little more than a whisper.
“And we didn’t even have to slay a giant to get them”, Francis beamed as he began to rummage for more plant pots.